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I and his family did all of the things. He visited a doctor. He just eats. A lot. Unhealthy foods. And at night especially.
The other stuff. He is mentally healthy. He became lazy and doesnt care how he looks because he came to the point he thinks i will love him no matter what. Which is true. Love yes. But be attracted? Impossible.
He is just lazy and comfortable. Nothing deeply wrong with him.
Completely disagree tbh – I think it's just case of actually being with the right person who loves you for being you.
Nobody needs anyone in their life who thinks they are NOT “attractive nor interesting.” Nobody! Imagine she wrote this and it was about you. Right? Let her go. Someone else will love having a dependable and loving woman they know they can lean on. She doesn't need your half-assed, pitiful attempt at a relationship.
The cheating is bad enough, but him trying to appear so caring and communicative during the work trip and then being able to go and bang her each night while knowing you were stressed and worried about the relationship is SO disgusting and disrespectful. He's really shown his true colours there. You deserve so much better.
I am having a hot time understanding and why he did this and why he wants to stay. Why not leave if you’re unhappy? Why the affair? How can you feel in love with an affair when you supposedly love someone else?
There are many reasons he'd want to stay. Your relationship is a safety net – a comfort blanket. He would rather be unfulfilled in a relationship than single. They have more confidence being in a relationship than being single. Have you heard how many men say that they notice they get hit on more when they're taken than when they're single? It's the confidence. There's a reason the majority of divorces are instigated by women. Men can be unhappy but they're less likely to pull the plug as they want to maintain their 'not single' status, or they are too comfortable. They end off either not putting any effort into the relationship or cheating, and then the woman initiates the breakup.
Wait until you’re completely over your ex. My rule of thumb is this: If you can talk to him without getting hurt over what you had with him then you’re golden. Otherwise, I’d wait. That’s just my suggestion tho, and that how Ik I’m truly over whatever I had with my ex.
She was looking for any reason to end it bro.. that’s the dumbest excuse for her. She’s already got another guy she’s lined up and was just waiting for something to end it with you. Sorry man.
Tell your wife you're making personal progress that will ultimately help your marriage. Continue your individual counseling until your therapist agrees it should move to joint counseling Your anger and resentment at your wife seem to be misdirected anger at yourself. That has to be dealt with first.
she's fully had every intention of cheating but began to regret her actions
I think it's this, she was in a growing side relationship with him, this may have been the first move he made or maybe not…. it's pretty bold for a first move, going from nothing to fingering doesn’t sound logical, there was almost certainly some physical contact and kissing before this… certainly that day, and probably on other days.
Op it feels like you have written an Essay on him.
Tell that man to get a new personal bank account tf. I wish i would let my mom have unprecedented access to my bank account. Like he has to ask you she needs to ask him. And them y’all can go from there cuz that’s just wild
Or a timeshare pitch with a twist proposal ending.
?♂️
Have a special night of a couple/few special events and just… ask… her…
If the bf has humour, that'll be hilarious!
I just talked to him, he said he was alone bc i got pretty sick a couple of weeks ago and didn't know what to do
Lol they don't owe you anything. Why would anyone put in the effort of doing a video call with someone to ask for their documents (do you even realize how ridiculous this sounds?), especially if that someone is an older person their son only met a few weeks ago online. Their son is a young man and they're protecting him. He should be out and about finding someone his age in his area.
The fact that you're angry at his parents for not wanting to talk to you (let me repeat: after you've known their son live! for a few weeks) only shows their instinct is right on this one. You should move the fuck on, let him move on, and avoid these types of situations.
Question, did you ever confront your partner about the emotional cheating? Or did you just contact her? Does your partner know you talked to her?
Then she was likely a co-owner., which is why it didn’t go to probate and not part of the inheritance. Still, I would get a 2nd opinion from a neutral party, you may have been a beneficiary. You don’t even need to tell your aunt you are seeking legal advice, I would just do it so you know where you stand and what options you may have.
how so!?!
Get out of your feelings my dude, you made a simple mistake that you didn’t know would cause problems for your girl. She told you she has a problem with it, now you know, and you can be more considerate with it in the future. It doesn’t sound like your gf blames you or thinks you’re an abuser, you just accidentally triggered her and that’s all.
Also I hope you’re not showing this guilt and self deprecation to her, because it’s not fair, especially if she’s then comforting you about it
And one last thing, another conversation about boundaries is probably in order I think
This. OP has no idea what he's about to do his gf and what potential impact this will re her relationship to her own body/disability if he goes through with this.
Why not hit up the disability subreddit for advice before you do this? Have you tried other things that are solutions that include her, or did you just not see sex working the way you're used to understanding sex working and then relegate one another to a sexless situation instead of adapting?
A monogamous person resigning themselves to their partner fucking other people because they feel like their disability is a burden on the relationship is a problem and, if it were me, I'd be wondering what part I had to play in my partner feeling this way.
Be comfortable saying “No”. No is an answer and a reason. If he gets hurt by it, it's on him, not you.
Sounds more like he doesn't want you to see a therapist because he's afraid of them helping you realize his extremely inappropriate behavior. I bet there are more red flags than what you've mentioned here.
Define predatory behavior. Because many descriptions I’ve seen on reddit are basically men hitting on women at places that serve alcohol.
No dementia. My grandmother just says stuff without a filter or thinking it through properly. This is how she has been my entire life. I can't change her.
This is exactly what you asked for and really better he happy. If you feel he needs to change again it's possible you need to change. You should probably see a therapist.
I was engaged to him before I learned of all this. 🙁 I just learned about this in Feb 2023, we were engaged Feb 2022…
Since you asked, I work in the med field and we donate medical supplies and money to disaster relief, whether foreign or in-country. I have never felt the need to “chaperone” the donated supplies and go see the unfortunates in person in order to do this.
Nor, if you actually read my comment instead of jumping straight into refuting your own fabrication of it, have I said it needs to stop. There is some voluntourism that absolutely does need to stop, but the sort that OP is engaged in is relatively harmless and probably doesn't result in too much extra work for the staff. But I did say that it should be called what it is – OP going over there isn't needed, nor is it helpful. The money and donated supplies are needed and helpful; having lunch with the kids is basically a payment to the voluntourists for their donations.
She's doing good by donating. She's being thanked for doing so by having an interaction with the poors. This trip isn't “volunteer work.”
Do what YOU want. This is your body and your pregnancy. You didn't baby trap him. He knew the risks and that you weren't on birth control. If you want this baby, figure out how you're going to make it work and have your support system in place. Take him to court for child support.
Wow, kinda sounds like me a few years ago. Unfortunately nobody can make him go, even if you did, without him wanting to go it won't help. Not until he decides it's time. I completely cut out all of my family and quit drinking before I decided it was time. Wish I would have done it sooner.
Women can't be dicks? You sure got me there! And now I want a donut.
Who cares what those people think of this decision. Cut him off ffs
“The term emotional affair describes a type of relationship between people. The term often describes a bond between two people that mimics or matches the closeness and emotional intimacy of a romantic relationship while not being physically consummated” wikipedia. If you are so inclined to be in relationship then you need to stop cheating. The only proper thing to do is cut your friend off completely.
That isn't the question the post is about lolol
I think he's made up. What a stupid story. Look at me, this is how a real man treats his woman.
Yeah it's fucked up. It's abusive and controlling. You shouldn't have a partner like that. It will be nothing but bad for you.
Decided to take a break recently with my (ex?) girlfriend, she said afterwards the moment I walked out the door she decided it was over. I thought it would have been for the best for both of us because it's been non stop arguing/awkward every morning. I've been trying to contact her without blowing her up for the past two weeks, and even though my name is on the lease as well I don't want to just walk in the loft. She finally answered my call today and I literally broke down telling her I don't want to go another day without her, but she said the distance has already done the damage and she's not sure she could continue after the break, during the two weeks I was telling everyone we are separated for a little bit to figure things out, she was telling everyone that we broke up.
I felt it helped, and would have / would be better if we get back together, but in her eyes the damage is done. I guess it would depend on how you each look at it. But also we are 30m and 28
???