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Yeah that's a big red flag. Imagine how he'd be when he gets even more comfortable with you. Move on and find someone better for sure.
First off going by Google maps, IPhone share location and find my phone and such type apps are dangerous for both parties. They are not always accurate and can do some damage to a person’s mental health, relationships and sometimes can cost people their lives. What I want to know is why you felt the need to check her location? Also what if she is at a club? Why is that a threat? I see the issue of the lie. No question there. If she is really at a club she should tell you such. I agree with that. Honesty is a requirement in a relationship but the fact that you checked her location after seeing her message sort of makes me question how well you would have received the information of her being at a club if that is where she truly is. I feel that there may be other things and feelings from the relationship we do not have knowledge of to take into account but I feel you should start by unraveling why you checked her location and didn’t take her word for face value. Now as I stated I have personally known those systems to be wrong and have been on both side of it when they were so please don’t not see it as a fact. Nothing is worse than telling someone the truth to just have them call you a liar and be left without any place to go in the discussion. It makes a person want to not go anywhere, to make sure they have pictures and proof like receipts of where they were with timestamps. And is it a possibility that there is a wine bar in that surrounding location? I don’t want to come off as sounding biased I just want to give you a few things to consider.
do i just text her that its over? that sounds rude and cowardly
It sure is.
but meeting up for breaking up sounds like its not going to end well
Yeah, breaking up with people isn’t easy, but doing it in person shows a lot more maturity.
You're the sum of the five people you spend the most time with. I'd be concerned if my partner was spending time with people in the adult industry. You should tell her you're uncomfortable. I'm sure if you hung out with people in the adult industry she'd be concerned too
Dude, this sounds like what the GF said with more details.
Quit while you are ahead. IMHO, randomly peeing with the dog is weirder than doing it to get the dog to pee.
Lol agree w/ top comment
Because it means that if I trip and fall they would be there to catch me
If he doesn't make you feel good, then why be with him? The whole point of being in a relationship is to be with someone who you enjoy spending time with, who makes you feel happy and give each other support. If you're not getting that, then you are better off being alone.
That's really shitty on his part. He could go to jail for a long time. I'm married and can still do time for doing that to her when she sleeps. A normal reaction would be to call him out for it. Set a boundary unless you don't care. If he did this to you who else has he done this too? You can let it go or call him out on it and if it really burned you up report it to the police. If you do report him make sure you text him to get him to admit to it. Let him know you were awake be really smart about it. Get a confession and you're good to go.
This post is a bait (J told me so)
For all intents and purposes it's just another relationship. Noone goes around and says here's my sugar baby Jan! Here's my sugar daddy Bob! Noones gots ta know!
To him. She can sell it to the other business partner
What if he doesn't offer a fair amount of money?
If you paid attention to the post, this was a possibility in the divorce proceedings
Yes, and at least one party didn't accept the offer. Let's just assume for simplicity's sake there's a 50% chance that OP is the cause for that failure to buy the other out.
What are you talking about the “laws and by-laws of small businesses”? Any business can be sold
Clearly you've never heard of shotgun clauses.
It is not always legal to sell to third parties without the consent of the other current partner.
Did you not read the post because it sounds like you're making stuff up
I did. I just don't take it on face value because OP has a vested interested in making their ex-wife look bad.
Neither wanted to accept a buyout hence why they were both involved.
Hypothetically, would you have accepted a 1$ buyout?
The offer wasn't good. That's why it didn't happen. If OP tried to buy their ex-wife out, it could have succeeded if he made a better offer.
It's almost as if you haven't heard of small business loans based on business' valuation
Lol. Trying to throw your own mistakes back at me. That's not going to work kiddo. I didn't make your mistakes.
Well after 6 years I pretty much noticed the pattern. I had issues I wanted to work with in the relationship, she cried horribly. I bottled up the issue and comforted her, and then nothing really happend in regards to fixing the issue at hand. Then the cycle just repeated when I couldn't bottle it up any more and brought it up again.
Eventually you just don't care how sad they are, because it's nothing compared to all the shit you've had to bottle up for years for their sake.
Hence the reason why in telling you not to bottle it up and comfort them about the self-hatred. Because honestly, you have no clue if this is just a sympathy card they pull, so they don't have to be accountable and work on the issues.
Because this thing right here;
It’s not that they don’t want to work on the issue, but that they get stuck in self hatred for having it happen in the first place.
Is a very easy thing to say to someone, so unless this person actually has made any changes at all in regards to the issues you have brought up before, you should really pay close attention to this particular type of behavior they are displaying.
Seemingly I am asking too many questions about the specific situation and she gets irate that I’m “taking their side.”
I admittedly do give people the benefit of the doubt, sometimes to a fault. I have a habit of asking her “comfort or solutions?” As in, which would she prefer? She then says whatever and leaves.
It’s as though she is punishing me for not blindly taking her side.
You find some self respect and let her go. This simping you're doing is cringe at its worst.
You're worth more than being a side piece and maid, start acting like it.
That is terrifying and there is no way I could stay with someone playing those games.
I see most are giving the gf a free pass here and telling OP that he should just talk to her and that it doesn’t necessarily mean she has any feelings for her ex.
Now all the various suggested scenarios explaining why she reacted the way she did could very well be true, but most are dismissing her responsibility in this situation. She must have known how it would look like to OP. If nothing else her friends must have told her how awkward it would’ve looked. So the onus shouldn’t be just on OP to clear the air. She should’ve approached OP the next day and explained to him why she reacted the way she did.
OP, no I don’t think you should automatically break up with her. Give yourself some time to calm down. But once you can approach the discussion calmly, talk to her. And you have every right to explain how hurt you feel by her reaction, and that you’d like to understand why she reacted the way she did.
Good luck.
I get you but I never questioned it until recently. She knew we were friends and wanted me to know they didn’t have sex. She certainly didn’t want me know that information but I don’t believe she was trying to fool me.
It's been 3 months bro. Adopting pets together is a lil early. Do you live! with them?
Me too and folks wonder why women are opting out of motherhood.
Ha, like I'd know (ok ok I watch Billions and therefore assume I actually know anything about finance)
So he is willing to be rude to your friends and other people, even willing to threaten violence, but this one girl he “doesn’t want to hurt her feelings”? Yeah listen to the people who have experienced dating him, he definitely sounds like a cheater. It’s not like he would start talking and develop such a deep connection to someone where he would be “hoping to date her” during a one day break. They’ve had conversations about being together before. Do you want to be with someone who “hates” to pick between his girlfriend and another girl? His only redeeming qualities are “he’s nice to me and treats me kindly”? Girl that’s the bare minimum!!! Do yourself a favour and listen to the people telling you that you can do wayyyy better. You sound to sweet to go through this.
You could phrase the situation that out of the x-number of women you slept with she was the one you chose. If she can’t leave sleeping dogs lay, and you’ve exhausted therapy, then you may need to divorce because she’s got something mental going on that you can’t solve or fix.
Why are you ignoring the comments telling you to cut off this friend? She has literally chosen to put you and your children in danger, that is not a friend.
What did I do?
Because I loved her focus and clarity. I did not know she will start trying to nag me for doing my job. I am already wearing what she says and fulfill other odd whims she has. But I feel a line is being crossed, if i am in other state and you ask me to drop everything and come only because you want to have a cup of icecream in cafe. atleast let me do my job peacefully.
So essentially he’s confessing that he had feelings for you back then. He wasn’t necessarily so in love with you that he wanted to be with you forever, but really liked you and saw a ring as a way to get to date you. Basically.
You need to ask him if he still has feelings before going any further with this. He very well might just see you as his friend now that it’s been 10 years and you’re adults and everything.
You never dated this guy and he was just going to propose to you? Just like that? Lol OK.
Also, he was (hopefully) what… 19/20 back then? You were 18?
You’re going to throw away what seems like a good relationship, over something that may or may not have happened 10 years ago, with someone you weren’t even in love with, but just had a crush on?
Also, how is he someone you consider a friend and he drops a bomb like this on you, knowing that you’re engaged and happy? How unfair is it of him to do that to you when he never expressed interest in you?
You’d be stupid to even give this a thought.
You’re almost 50. Presumably you’re pretty entrenched in your monogamy. What possible middle ground do you see here?
Ask her to at least wipe her feet as she walks all over you. She needs ‘more time to process’ to get her story straight with her other boyfriend before discussing with you.
Let her know you want to go golfing with her and see how she reacts.
Are you going to end it with him? Please don’t believe him if he says he will change. He’s almost 30. At that point, it’s pretty rare that someone will drastically change their personality
The single easiest way to improve your sex life immediately is to dump that dude out of your bed and straight to the curb.