I want to say this as delicately and kindly as possible.
Relationships are weird, Marriages ARE FUCKING WEIRD.
You need to see a therapist and work through your issues. While I will concede that the circumstances with which you discovered the sexual dynamics of your parents marriage in a very traumatic situation, you have repeatedly stated that your parents have been open with you about their relationship (some of the things described even being too personal) yet you continuously made attempts to force them to halt the word but functional dynamic that brings your parents happiness.
You were/are so singularly focused on how you are perceived, what you believe “normal” is, that you would rather live in a car and remove your parents from your life with zero regard of the pain and harm this has on anyone else but boo-hoo crybaby you.
What I think is the crux and irony of this issue is the fact that this was such a shock to you means that your parents did a pretty good job providing you with a “normal” life. Bruh, you’re literally marrying your Highschool sweetheart at 22. What life experience do you merit to know what a “normal” marriage is? Especially after what sounds like more than 22 years of marriage.
I’ll end with this, cutting out your family on the merits of only the intimate details of their marriage and recycling the same pain is a cheap and stupid poison that will make you a bitter and angry husk of a person. THIS WILL EFFECT YOIR MARRIAGE, YOU ARE BRINGING ALL OF THIS BAGGAGE WITH YOU. Get help.
u/ThrowRA_orangutan If somebody really likes you, they will make it very obvious and will show up for a date! They'd also never send you mixed messages. She is not the girl for you. Move on.
I don't, my local gym had 1 female trainer, a year prior to that it had none (and that's only as long as I was there so who knows). Also, OP says she's training for a specific sport so that limits trainers.
But seriously, you're suggesting chaperoning? Ick.
You’re having these emotions now. So you should speak to them now. Delaying things only causes more resentment and tension. And it’s also not fair for her if you bottle a ton up and then pour it all out at once…. Especially on what’s supposed to be a romantic getaway.
Thanks! We’re actually pretty successful and have been with many women together! And it’s definitely not every time, just something we both enjoy! I really appreciate the support!
Let him go. Not just based off of his accusations but the mania that seems to be behind it. He went from 0-100 REAL quick and doesn’t even seem open to listen to reason. He’s 28. He’s too grown to be acting like such a child and you’re too young to settle for it
I think he's either trying to use you very mild and awkward live experience to eat at your self esteem and make you think badly about yourself Or He can't watch teens in anything without sexualizing them and he thinks that's normal enough that you must be doing it too.
This guy is waving some gigantic red flags right in your face. I’d encourage you to take a step back and really think about what a healthy relationship/partnership looks like. Because I believe that you’ll find that it doesn’t look like the one you’re in now.
Ummm, that’s not accidental and you’re not being paranoid. I don’t think it’s off limits to ask her. Clearly they’re talking about more than just the kids, so you’re well within your right to ask imo. I don’t think there’s any reason to be accusatory towards her tho, she’s not the one who owes you loyalty.
Then you need to make sure going forward, when he is honest, you reward him for the honesty by thanking him and managing how you feel calmly, instead of punishing him for it by causing a fight. I speak from experience on this (the honesty factor thing).
It isn't turning into it: it IS a physically abusive relationship. Her being a women doesn't change that. As a woman, she's being a raging c u next Tuesday.
It will impact your child. You need to make a record and gather evidence of her abuse, otherwise if/when you do leave her it may be difficult to gain full custody of your child. Your child is in danger with this woman.
Take your head out of the sand and tell your partner to keep his comments to himself.
doesn’t sound like his intentions are good at all tbh. that’s just what he’s telling you bc he knows you’ll buy it
I want to say this as delicately and kindly as possible.
Relationships are weird, Marriages ARE FUCKING WEIRD.
You need to see a therapist and work through your issues. While I will concede that the circumstances with which you discovered the sexual dynamics of your parents marriage in a very traumatic situation, you have repeatedly stated that your parents have been open with you about their relationship (some of the things described even being too personal) yet you continuously made attempts to force them to halt the word but functional dynamic that brings your parents happiness.
You were/are so singularly focused on how you are perceived, what you believe “normal” is, that you would rather live in a car and remove your parents from your life with zero regard of the pain and harm this has on anyone else but boo-hoo crybaby you.
What I think is the crux and irony of this issue is the fact that this was such a shock to you means that your parents did a pretty good job providing you with a “normal” life. Bruh, you’re literally marrying your Highschool sweetheart at 22. What life experience do you merit to know what a “normal” marriage is? Especially after what sounds like more than 22 years of marriage.
I’ll end with this, cutting out your family on the merits of only the intimate details of their marriage and recycling the same pain is a cheap and stupid poison that will make you a bitter and angry husk of a person. THIS WILL EFFECT YOIR MARRIAGE, YOU ARE BRINGING ALL OF THIS BAGGAGE WITH YOU. Get help.
u/ThrowRA_orangutan If somebody really likes you, they will make it very obvious and will show up for a date! They'd also never send you mixed messages. She is not the girl for you. Move on.
Can you do an image search for his profile picture, and see if it turns up any “generic profiles” with different names?
Somebody who knows about social media – can this be done?
Get off your backside, grow a pair and go talk to your son. Make the effort any normal parent would. My god, what even is this post?
Hell no
I don't, my local gym had 1 female trainer, a year prior to that it had none (and that's only as long as I was there so who knows). Also, OP says she's training for a specific sport so that limits trainers.
But seriously, you're suggesting chaperoning? Ick.
Look for another doctor. That one sucks.
Yeah.. I was stupid and desperate
Tell him, “they aren’t jokes and you are not funny, you are just being an ashhole. Knock it off.”
You’re having these emotions now. So you should speak to them now. Delaying things only causes more resentment and tension. And it’s also not fair for her if you bottle a ton up and then pour it all out at once…. Especially on what’s supposed to be a romantic getaway.
Thanks! We’re actually pretty successful and have been with many women together! And it’s definitely not every time, just something we both enjoy! I really appreciate the support!
Genitals look like shit. It's where stuff comes out. Who cares what yours look like.
Talk to him. He needs to know that it's rude/offensive af.
Let him go. Not just based off of his accusations but the mania that seems to be behind it. He went from 0-100 REAL quick and doesn’t even seem open to listen to reason. He’s 28. He’s too grown to be acting like such a child and you’re too young to settle for it
Talk to a divorce lawyer and bring all your informantion.
Then talk to friends and family to get support ready for you and kids.
Then kick him out or move out when you serve him papers.
Be strong. You got this.
I think he's either trying to use you very mild and awkward live experience to eat at your self esteem and make you think badly about yourself Or He can't watch teens in anything without sexualizing them and he thinks that's normal enough that you must be doing it too.
He sounds unpleasant.
This guy is waving some gigantic red flags right in your face. I’d encourage you to take a step back and really think about what a healthy relationship/partnership looks like. Because I believe that you’ll find that it doesn’t look like the one you’re in now.
Ummm, that’s not accidental and you’re not being paranoid. I don’t think it’s off limits to ask her. Clearly they’re talking about more than just the kids, so you’re well within your right to ask imo. I don’t think there’s any reason to be accusatory towards her tho, she’s not the one who owes you loyalty.
I hope you’re right. If I decide to reach out I’ll wait until I’m not actively emotional, because I don’t want to make things worse.
Then you need to make sure going forward, when he is honest, you reward him for the honesty by thanking him and managing how you feel calmly, instead of punishing him for it by causing a fight. I speak from experience on this (the honesty factor thing).
It's a dogwhistle.
Something is “based” if it follows their bigoted ideology.
In this case she is “based” because she is Asian and alt right morons think that all Asian woman are meek and subservient towards men.
It isn't turning into it: it IS a physically abusive relationship. Her being a women doesn't change that. As a woman, she's being a raging c u next Tuesday.
It will impact your child. You need to make a record and gather evidence of her abuse, otherwise if/when you do leave her it may be difficult to gain full custody of your child. Your child is in danger with this woman.