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Aida, 21 y.o.
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Tell him that he is no longer a choice at all, and wish him luck with getting the girl he really wants.
You can do better than some jerk who negs you.
Silently make an exit plan asap, leave your cats with people you can trust.
I've been there dealing with a narc, you need to get out of there for your health. Seriously.
If you truly connect, I don't see a problem. But bare in mind that males develop until the age of 25, mental development included. So don't expect incredible maturity from your boyfriend and try to be patient.
Just say “guess so” and move on
Ok, there are just some men you have to spell it out for. You have to tell them exactly what you want them to do in all aspects, including in bed, and if you don’t, they don’t think they did anything wrong.
You don't stay with someone because you're afraid of hurting their feelings or the fact that they have nowhere to go. You have many, many valid reasons for jumping this guy. First of all you're not his mother. Second of all his mother didn't teach him very well did she or he just doesn't give a damn. Dump him, he'll find out when he doesn't get another girlfriend for a long long time that hey smell does matter and icky teeth do matter, clean clothes matter. Not making a mess in your own home and living in roaches matters. If you're the only one on the lease kick him out now. He's got to have some friends he can couch there for a while and if he doesn't I guess he'll have to rent a room or get a hotel for a few nights till he figures out his living situation. But again you are not his mother. If you're afraid of how he might react and ask a friend to come over and be on standby maybe in your bedroom while you tell him to get out and that it's over between the two of you. But it's not going to work out, you two are vastly different and many many levels.
My partner works at one such company. There's only two events that SOs/families can attend, and that's the 4th of July picnic and Christmas party. All of the other socializing (1-2 times a month) is employee only.
None of that bothers me, because I'm normally working during them. I have yet to meet his co-workers after three years.
So, yeah, there are some companies that do employee only social gatherings.
Obviously it's someone who knows your workplace.
Secret admirer or stalker at work?
I presumed they were being sarcastic as OP doesn't seem concerned about the abuse
Yep. Major psychosomatic vibes. Especially with how she refuses to do anything. She's definitely ill, but it's mental, not physical. I would be curious to know if she's ever been in therapy or seen any sort of mental health professional, or if the doctors have ever recommended that.