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strongly disagree with this. The alcohol consumption isn't the issue here, the being drugged is. If she wasn't drugged then she would have been in the state of mind to control her actions and never would have been in this situation in the first place. Just being drunk doesn't absolve you of responsibility when it comes to cheating
I agree with you on the fact that being drunk doesnt absolve someone of responsibility when it comes to making poor decisions BUT i did want to point out the issue of consent because of how OP describes the guys behavior of how “she was coming on to him” and “he didnt assault her” which was deceitful from the guy who took advantage of her and assaulted her.
Also no depending on the person and amount of alcohol consumed you may not be in the right state of mind to make decisions. We do stupid shit when were drunk, like you and i both said doesnt absolve responsibility but it does raise the issue of consent. Which is my point.
So he went to therapy. What changes has he made to his behavior? Does he still dump out the coffee you make him? Has he started cooking? Does he do an equal share of the cleaning?
You've been telling him for years what you need from him. From what you've written, it sounds like he's done basically none of it. That's not the behavior of someone who loves and respects you.
The issue is, if in 3 years he decides he doesn't want kids, that leaves you at 35 having to start again and find someone whom you connect with who also wants kids. That's not an easy ask.
Not to scare you here, but my husband and I started trying when I was 32 and we didn't fall pregnant until I was 35 (am currently 32 weeks pregnant). It isn't always easy and can take some years. So if you weren't starting until you were 35 (or older), it COULD mean you weren't able to conceive until closer to 40 and while that in itself isn't a huge issue, it is something to consider.
As you grow older your AMH (number of viable eggs you have left) decreases rapidly and a lower AMH sadly means it's harder to conceive as you don't ovulate the best quality egg every month.
Personally if I were in your situation and know what I know now about fertility, I'd be telling him it's a deal breaker for you, you love him but this is a must have for you and if it isn't for him that's ok but you can't waste your time with someone who is indecisive on such a significant important life decision.
I wish you all the best of luck here as no matter the outcome it's not going to be a good situation in the short term.
Sounds like this is someone you'd like to date. For whatever reason, he doesn't want to date you but enjoys stringing you along.
He doesn't want to date you. Stop letting him string you along.