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Please stop with the biphobia. It's gross.
Imagine you don’t tell her and she finds out later.
It also isn’t fair to not disclose this about people you on-line with. It should be her choice to choose if she’s comfortable with the relationship knowing your history with your roommates even if you don’t intend to cheat on her. It isn’t fair to hide that and not let her make the choice on what her boundaries and comfort level are. This is the other side of how your choices can sometimes complicate things for yourself.
Oh honey.. he couldn’t be bothered to buy you flowers let alone be faithful. He only wants to stay to ensure you don’t report him.
Let him go and be done with him.
Btw, I wanna say thank you. It helps me to think through it. I also don't want to control anyone and it doesn't sounds right to me. I google it up and search other people experience.
The fact that he told his wife he is moving on and tell her about me should be enough.
I think I would tell him how I feel and let him do whatever with the information. I trust him that he is healing, moving on and have genuine feeling for me.
This sounds like my relationship which is going 6 years and counting. TBH, this sounds like an incompatibility thing – you’re having issues with a core piece of his being. The reason why it works for my partner and I is because I don’t even think about it ever. It doesn’t bother me. It doesn’t occupy brain space for me.
I think you have to decide whether or not you want that dynamic forever or if you want to find someone with a more aggressive personality.
As far as I can tell, a woman liked a post of a man that she's not romantically interested in. This is a non-event.
Lack of experience doesn't matter. My husband didn't have any before we met. And I taught him a lot. The rest came due to experimenting with different kinks and so on.
It's easy to get the best sex possible with a partner you're comfortable with if both of you communicate and take your time to explore stuff together.
I’m so sorry to hear this and my heart hurts for you. As hot as it is now, it will get better, promise. And though this won’t mean much right now, one day you’ll look back and appreciate what you learned during this time and from this relationship.
Honestly, I was in a relationship like this, but I was your partner in this story. I had to end things because I was too tired to try and on-line my life when all my energy went into picking them up. So many things in life are nude, difficult. Relationships shouldn’t be like that. It sounds like he just finally had enough. You could consider therapy as it sounds like lots of this boils down to your self esteem, and you need to learn to be your own person and love yourself again. All the best!
He gets off on patronizing you. It’s why he chose someone 10 years younger.
Can't you get like a cosplay mentor?
So, this might get mixed reviews but…
The first year of marriage is really stressful, even in a happy marriage when it's good stress. It's a very big life change. So it's moving to another country alone without a spouse. High stress situations do align themselves with poorer use of prefrontal cortex…
Points in her favor: She could've easily pretended that that message was nothing and kept the lie going, it at least you alluded to that… but it was her guilt that finally outed her.
It seems (I could be wrong though) from the post and your comments that you've looked through her messages and that's all you've found in the three years since it happened… so it appears she's telling the truth about it being the one guy, and has now gone five times longer without cheating than she has prior to the one (long) episode.
Points against her: It wasn't just sex. It was a whole ass relationship. And it lasted for months..
It took over three years for you to find out, so how much longer would it take to find out about another?
She hasn't blocked him altogether
I agree with one of the most rational commenters: Step 1: make NO decisions right now. Give it a good 6 months. Step 2: individual and group counseling. Non-negotiable Step 3: she blocks him from every platform/ form of communication forever. No goodbye, no explanation to him. Block and be done. Step 4: start working NOW to become independent, so should you decide this was a deal breaker, there are fewer barriers to leaving.
I was the one in your shoes (kinda), 5 years ago. Found out nearly 3 years afterward, while very pregnant, that during the PRIOR pregnancy, a year into marriage, that he was working on a whole relationship, for months, with someone else, right under my nose. Luckily? There was no sex, but near the end, an alone time outing was being planned (or attempted), when a family emergency caused her to realize who his wife was (we actually knew each other) and saw how pregnant I was, and she shut the whole thing down (NOT him). I found out because of imessage and an old iPad being found for FaceTime calls while he was away for a week. There were a few messages that somehow got missed in the deleting all the evidence process from the iPad, then forgotten about…
this discovery, at a time when he had just left for a week and couldn't return to deal with it, was distressing to say the least and after for days of what felt like torture, ragen and devastation on my end, and complete open communication and only remorse on his, I went into preterm labor, and was forced to GTFover it ASAP… so I messaged her, calmly explaining the situation, and that i really just needed to expedite the closure process but to do that i felt i needed corroboration from her to see if there were any other lies. A few small details were different but the big picture items were pretty consistent (but not overly consistent as a jointly rehearsed story would've been). She was also very apologetic and told me how guilty she felt about it are realizing it was me on the other side. And then when he got back, he let/ made me slap him, was perfectly fine with every one of my demands, which ended up with her blocked, and every other female friend on social media who wasn't kin to one of us or over 60 unfriended, and a few other somewhat unreasonable demands, but then again, I was also pregnant, so….
We worked through it. That was 5 years ago. And i don't really think about it anymore.
Or he’s a junkie. Have you seen trainspotting?
He is consistently letting you know that he can and will hurt you when he chooses to. It’s only a matter of time before this escalates even more. Please break up with him, but do it over the phone, he is not safe.
This is a pretty common abusive tactic designed to beat down your self-esteem until you believe you can’t do any better. Because he knows you can do better. And because he knows that you won’t do better if you don’t think you deserve better.
You are in an abusive relationship. But now that you know it you can do something about it.
Give yourself being single as a birthday present this year.
Well after talking to her you can be sure she’s probably texted him asking him wtf So you might be able to get some new info I guess
Worse: she diagnosed her with PPD because they didn't stop by to visit OP after enduring the traumatic birth that had involved 1. Getting induced and then being in labor for THREE DAYS 2. An emergency c-section 3. TWo more days in the hospital.
But, no, it's not that the exhausted, sleep-deprived, probably-traumatized, and (in mom's case) in possibly-excruciating pain parents needed to get themselves and their newborn home safely to recover and bond; no, it had to be PPD causing them to not prioritize appeasing the narcissistic demands of the entitled JNMIL.
It means he’s a shady liar. Sorry bc you love him, but you need to get a grip. They aren’t wondering, they’re on other women he’s seeing behind your back and lying to your face and then gaslighting/blaming you for his lies.
Honestly – I would delete his number and move on. If he wants to get in touch in the future he can, but you will always be unhealthily dwelling on it unless you take positive action.
Lmfao breaking up with you before the concert. Epic. Let her mess up her bag.
Common read the post! It says clearly she brought the cat in and the wife “fell in kove with the cat”!
Yesterday I told Heidi Klum she had to go home because Margot Robbie was coming over. I felt bad but it had to be done.
Sweetie dump this man. He's emotionally manipulating you and is trying to guilt trip you into doing something you said from the start you weren't comfortable with.
Open relationships/polygamy isn't by themselves a problem but they need a degree of trust that your ex isn't capable of.
He doesn't love you really he just likes having you around. Him trying to push boundaries like this is a clear sign he doesn't truly care about you. You're still young I'm positive you can find somebody that truly cares about you and won't push your boundaries like this.