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Comment Rule 1: All comments must be on topic and focus on the OP, in good faith. Derailing arguments, fights, and moral whataboutism is not allowed. Advice given must be good, ethical advice. Remember, the goal is to help your fellow human.
To be generous within your means is what you want.
Cheating is never ok. There's no excuse. If you're that unsatisfied with your relationship, end it. Try as nude as you want, you're not going to find a justification that isn't bullshit.
Thank you!
I want to say normal albeit in a gray zone because any usual partner would not be pleased. I would let go unless he starts exchanging body fluids with someone.
RUN
Never tell…it will cause resentment
Thank you so much for this perspective and sharing your experience. This completely breaks my heart but I’m going to look into the narcissistic abuse cycle and see how I feel. I want to say this isn’t us, but I guess I wouldn’t really know while I’m in the relationship. In general, he is a good man, he is not controlling in any way, he loves our dog like our kid, he is so great a gift giving and loves to spoil me with gifts, and for the first 2.5 years he was my safe space and the person who validated my feelings & experiences. That’s why I want to say this isn’t that, but like I said maybe I wouldn’t know since I’m in it. Thank you, thank you, thank you!
No leave! She is already out the door.
Lots of heartache if you stay. Get ready to feel emasculated even more.
She may be her own problem some girls come easy, some come nude, maybe some never come at all.
Go out into the real world and make some ladies come dude.
YOU CAN DOO IT!
Thank you for this. I briefly skimmed through it (will have more time later) but do you know what will happen if someone takes this prescriptions but still drinks?
Yeah I'd want to burn the house down. Parasites gross me out so much even though I know pinworms are not harmful and are REALLY common.
this is less about communication and more about common courtesy. every husband I know – various marriage styles like SAHM or working couples – when the one partner cooks the other cleans. you fall into a pattern. If he recently lost his job, he should have more reason to help. You are being his parent, not partner.
So she wasn’t accused of black face, but cultural appropriation. I’ve heard this comment before, like white kids shouldn’t dress up as Black Panther for Halloween.
I honestly don’t know what the answer is.
Lol there’s no such thing as ugly hard
People say “ugly hot” but you post explained what actually going on. Note: they were talking about celebrities right?
That’s what ugly nude is. Someone who’s ugly but regular people overlook it because the ugly person is famous /rich/ talented so they’d still want to get with them. Put that same ugly person working the cash register at the supermarket and suddenly they’re no so nude anymore ?♂️
Thank you for your input. I've been trying to more or less follow what you advise, though as I said in my original post, it's pretty nude. It might seem odd to younger people that a guy my age would be asking this type of question (as witnessed by another reply I got) but I'm my defence it's never simple navigating the matters of the heart, no matter one's age. Anyway, thanks for your thoughtful reply.
How should I react? He made me cry when he punched the wall and didn't even ask me if I'm ok. He slammed the doors and left the house for an hour and then texted me to ask if it's over.
How should you react? Tell him that your relationship is over. If you don't feel safe saying it face to face, text him.
A clear pattern starts somewhere.
It started the moment he ignored you in favor of his own pleasure.
Time to run a thousand miles.
My point wasn’t about force, it was about stubbornness on your part. You’re swapping being a people pleaser (doing only about what others want) for being stubborn (doing only what you want). When the solution for either issue is caring about both sides, and finding win/win solutions rather than looking to win at the other persons expense.
If this were done to a woman, it'd be revenge porn, and you'd be in jail
Take your parents opinion out of it for a second. Are you happy in your relationship? Does he make your life better? Do you want to online with him or online alone?
Base your decision on that and not on what anyone else is telling you to do
She said no, and you move on. Don’t be creepy.
But that’s what OP didn’t do, tell her fiancée. And we are nearly a week later.
No, he doesn’t get to go along and supervise his girlfriend to make sure she “behaves” around a penis having professional trainer. He gets to put on his big boy pants and get some therapy before she sees the light and throws him out on his ass like I would.
How does your guy function knowing that you are alive in a world with men in it?
Kids who’ve been emotionally neglected stop showing emotion, you traumatized and neglected her and are mad and blame her for how she reacted to your abuse.
There’s also an event log you can generate from the computer itself that shows startups, among other things. Not sure if it can recall something from weeks away though.
If she acts like she does, then what’s the difference? She’ll never consent to a diagnosis. That’s part of the fucking disorder.
He will only respect you if you respect yourself.
Tell him you know something is going on and you will not be made a fool off so you want him gone.
And the fact you now know they have slept together and probably still are,
Either you pack up or pack his stuff up and say you don't care what excuse he comes up with but you are no body's fool and you will not spend the best part of you younger years being cheated on and made a fool of
Sorry mistake
Do they also have to be 10 years younger? Bc you played yourself
I agree! Since when was it solely OP's responsibility to put her bf in a good mood every day? He's taking the piss! And is trying to manipulate her into doing what he wants by referring to his ex's. I highly doubt that they gave him head everyday, or when he tried the same stunt on them he soon ended up being a ex.
Cheers .. yeahh this is what my brain is telling me too .. life is hard enough without this drama
this is from couple to couple different but daily is so much i get head every birthday lol
Dumpster fire. Move along.
Childhood trauma is not an excuse to treat others like shit when you are an actual adult. He's an adult, no longer a child, OP. It's not on him to take care of this trauma – hell I know a lot of people with nightmarish childhoods who don't act like this. There needs to be a moment in which an adult person has to take responsibility for their own behavior. It's pathetic that someone who is almost 30 still thinks that childhood trauma is a free pass to be abusive.
Let me repeat: he's not a troubled child or a teen in a difficult situation. He is an adult fucking man!
He's not taking responsibility for his behavior, trying to push it on “trauma”, which tells me all I need to know about whether he is truly sorry or not. He's not. He's not going to change. He's simply abusive, OP, plain and simple. You fell into the trap of “oh no this abusive man has The Sads and I must rescue him”. That's not how abusive men work, and there is no happy ending here for you. Only further abuse.
It's a tacky thing to ask. Yes, you're both benefiting from the procedure, but A) Like you said, it's his body, B) He will keep the benefit if the relationship ends and C) You've only been together a month.
I can't imagine asking someone to share the cost of elective surgery unless we're sharing finances already. (And even then, it would depend on the surgery).
Ok, well, so then it's not that they think you're a murderer.
Proceed as normal, I guess.
Or, go to a different dating app
Popping in to say that yours is the first reasonable stance on this issue that I've seen. It's fair and equal and seems very appropriate for a partnership without putting either party at an unfair advantage or disadvantage.
I know praise from strangers doesn't mean much but I just wanted to say it's nice to see someone have a healthy approach for this.
Double check your math on that. If split evenly, each person should have contributed $15k to the down payment.
He’s sending mixed signals. I’d let him sort himself out and move on (don’t text him). It’s over
I was a big partier all through my twenties and have literally never cheated on anyone or even come close to it. People who are going to cheat are going to cheat regardless of what activities they're doing because it's a character flaw, not a matter of environment.
Hell, the number one place people cheat is at work.
This. She's probably gonna do shit like this OP. Maybe even more if she's into people looking at her like that. It's her body she can do what she wants. U can't tell her not to. That would make u seem controlling.
But again I'm a woman and as a woman you are under no obligation to just accept it and be happy with it. If it makes u uncomfortable that shes posting stuf like this or even maybe considering posting stuff for OF you can leave the relationship and should. Your boundaries matter too.
There is a huge difference between being controlling and having boundaries that some ppl don't get. You can't tell anyone what to do/ who to hang out with or what to wear when it comes to their own body. She can't request the same from u. That's being controlling.
But if she's exhibiting behavior you personally don't want from a partner or having your friends/family be able to ur gf half nude..can imagine thts quite awkward.. you should break up. Yall have different values. Find yourself a girl who doesn't want her body on display that way. They exist bt don't try to convince yourself ur okay with this and then resent her.
Your feelings matter. There are plenty of fish in the sea just because she's the first you've caught doesnt mean she's the last. You are very young my dude!
I (22f), a recent college graduate, was finally offered a great job that requires me to relocate far away from my partner (21 m) of 2 years. Need advice…
I (22f) currently live! in one of the most expensive cities in North America, and I am struggling to find a full-time job. I moved here to complete a program offered by my university, in which I received a degree that had me specialize in a sought-out software skill. Since graduation, I have been applying to jobs almost every day without many call-backs, and I've been anxious and depressed for many days.
Today, I got accepted for a position that pays me more than any of the jobs that I've applied for. It has a great benefits package, plus it's a training position too. Rather than paying to get a Masters, this gives me the work AND educational experience. This job will also advance my career, and I am extremely lucky to have been accepted out of all the other bright applicants. However, if I were to accept this position, then I have to move away (~15 hour drive). I'm so torn…I should be extremely happy right now, but I think that my relationship with my partner (21m)–whom I've been with for almost 2 years–is going to deteriorate. He has his roots in this city, whereas I have always travelled and lived all over. I see him as my soulmate, and I love him for everything that he is. I envisioned a future with him. A month ago, I have already turned down a fellowship opportunity that would've made me relocate, but I don't want to resent him.
I am extremely torn because…I am content to move anywhere, but he is set on living in this city for the rest of his life. Additionally, he is still in school, so it's already a long-distance relationship.
I have to make my decision by the end of this week…What should I tell him? I would like some perspective as to what I should consider when deciding to turn down/accept this position. Thank you so much in advance.
unpopular opinion but i honestly feel like men are from mars women are from venus might be worth reading. it totally talks about how a lot of men shut down when talking.