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I think you’re overthinking it, friends hold hands a lot. Maybe it’s a cultural difference (non American) but holding hands with a friend doesn’t sound scandalous. I am not convinced that holding hands with someone during a movie is cheating, I can’t recall how many times someone has squeezed my hands when they are scared before.
Uh huh. Good partners don't verbally abused their partners for one bad night of heavy drinking.
Yoga is good at hitting all the muscles of the hips/glutes.
Maybe grab some icecream and some of her favourite movies and ask her if she wants to have a girls night. Then just tell her that you're there for her if she wants to talk
You answered your own question. You don't trust them because you met a couple of bad ones.
Try changing your surroundings and you'll find probably better suited ones that are some values
He said that in the comments, you are just making assumptions at this point and not focusing on what he is saying. How do you know that this isn’t a boundary for her as well? Again everyone could lie we don’t know that we only can judge by what he is saying. What you are saying literally makes no sense.
She sounds like she has a crush on him and doesn’t care about you. You need to talk to your husband and either he block her/ stop taking to her or keep it totally professional
I’m guessing the physical affair didn’t end up being what you wanted/expected so NOW you realize you’ve done wrong.
You’re welcome ❤️
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Hopefully he gets the message in time to take care of it. Please keep us updated
Dude who tf does something like that? That poor dog, your partner sounds horrifying, dump his stupid ass.
Oh, good grief, tell him to grow a couple.
Hey, OP. I hope that you’re able to get your shit together out in Arizona, and fine the happiness that you deserve. Practice acceptance as a way of life, and learn to let go of the past.
Good luck.
Fun fact, high testosterone is linked to lower speed count/quality. He was even more dumb than you gave him credit for! ?
Best thing to do is fix your relationship and be the best and most in love ever. She’ll die that her plan didn’t work.
Care to elaborate? I think you're wrong but I'm curious as to why you think that.
I’m not sure how getting married solves anything as you have said.
He bought the condo before marriage so I would think it would be considered a pre-marital asset. He still isn’t obligated to put your name on the deed once you get married. Soooo…..
I don’t see an issue with “renting” from him for a limited time. But your comment about him breaking up with you if you have your own house is alarming and I would look at this as a huge red flag. He wants to use you to pay his mortgage while preventing you from having your own home. That’s not a sign of someone who cares about you.
Massive age gap? Check.
Adult preying on a teen? Check.
Teen doesn’t have strong relationship with parents or friends or anyone to warn her dating an adult as a teen is a horrible idea? Check.
Actually marrying the older creep? Check.
Creep already has a child? Check.
Wife works and does all housework? Check.
Creep constantly makes adulterous jokes? Check.
Sigh. I have no words anymore. I know Reddit skews things because only people with terrible relationships make the posts, but c’mon. How can OP think getting with someone so old and with a kid when she was a teen was a good idea.
Like even if you’re not a super smart teen, shouldn’t it be obvious the guy is not a decent man?
Several things going on here and I guess you’ll get diverse opinions on this one. First of all, I totally agree with the fact that you (as the sole breadwinner in that household) need to make time for exercising and decompressing a little bit, your wife and kids will be having a NAKED time if you’re not around. Second, why don’t you safe yourself some money stress by creating a schedule with both grandmas so they can help your wife with the children? Paying for a nanny when there’re 3 women that basically depend on your income in the house seems like a waste of money, the grandmas are there to help your wife so it seems like a stretch to have a nanny as well. Third, by reducing nanny expenses you can suggest your wife to use that money to see a therapist, go get a massage every now and then, etc. that might help with her situation and the lack of motivation she’s currently having. Honestly, I think you’re doing your best as a husband, father, son and son-in-law.
Friend from abroad is visiting and she was spending time with her friend.
She did not answer for 2 hrs.
You are so clingy and desperate.
Your clinginess is well past static cling.
Well,past Seran wrap.
You are at about “ booger on your finger that you can’t shake off” level.
Thank you! We’ve talked about moving in together and marriage and kids in the future but I’ve said I want to travel first and he seems quite happy to wait, so I’m seeing that as a positive sign
My (23F) boyfriend (25m) constantly talks about inappropriate stuff and i’m not sure how to proceed.
I feel there is stuff that she does that sort of exacerbate my frame of mind.
Bruh I’m just giving it to you straight – your gf is busy and if thats a dealbreaker you should break it off (nicely) and say things aren’t working out.
Your decision was sort of correct. I presume there was evidence of enough to put her fidelity into question. You don't need to be detective or have elaborate reason for break up. It doesn't even matter whether she was cheating, she was doing things that made you feel she has.
Of course it would easier if you have just said what it was.
Gym shorts bro. At a minimum
Every woman goes through miscarriages or at least a whole lot more than people tend to think. Your MIL sounds emotionally unstable and it is very likely she will get involved in how you raise your child. You need to set naked boundaries and your fiancé needs to be on board with this. She will us her dead daughter (aka foetus) to emotionally blackmail him: I lost one daughter and now you’re taking my granddaughter away, so if you don’t think he can stand up to that, either move or find a different partner.
Yes, you should meet him.
He was upfront about his boundaries and early on, and that's a good thing. And if that's your boundary, then you don't waste your time either.
A pre-nup is like an insurance policy. You don't have to use it if nothing bad happens.
And now he's told you indirectly that marriage is not off the table despite having previously been married.
Dude lol, you’re sending thirst traps (this is what gym bod photos are, I don’t care who you’re trying to fool) with another woman and are shocked your wife has a problem with it?
Hold up a piece of paper with her name and today's date…. Never ever send your ID to anyone.
Nice update. Good luck in finding your next spark!
Yeah, like I'm into clever people but no amount of clever makes up for the kind of deficiencies she has. Why would anyone want to be with someone who doesn't even like them? It's importantly if he's so sub par in her eyes why is she with him? It seems like she enjoys putting him down.
You weren't exclusive, but she was lying about it. For me that is a dealbreaker and I'd be out. By lying, should took away your choice of making a decision if you wanted to date someone that was seeing other people.
I saw your old post where you talk about him having a porn addiction and denying you sex .. ever think that maybe he’s been sleeping with her still and that’s why he won’t sleep with you ?
Btw. Considering he can’t satisfy you sexually and now you find out he’s been cheating on you … even if it was 2 years ago it doesn’t matter, if you guys had exclusivity then he betrayed your trust? Is this guy really worth all this heartbreak ?
I think you should take time to focus on yourself.
What did you mean by signing the paperwork?
Med school is more of an achievement than a marriage. Celebrate you!
Your family keep treating you second because they can. Don't let them!
Yeah, I've been threatened with that so many times I've grown cold to that really.
It's pure manipulation. People experience these emotions and thoughts and they try to cling on to something like it's their property. Say whatever they can to mislead you.
If someone tells me they'll kill themselves I would actually just walk away sooner. If they keep threatening me afterwards I'll inform their family.
From what OP says, they only text. It's every few weeks where most of the conversation is about job searching in their field of work. Sounds more like OP has some insecurities that are popping up. Specially for it to be over someone she doesn't see IR, and where he's read all their innocent texts.
For what it’s worth, I actually don’t think this is a big deal. She would like to spend time with her friends. It’s not one on one time with an ex, he just happens to be part of the old friends group. And it’s normal when visiting friends to stay at their place.
So move far… stop being your own roadblock. No one will cry for you my dude. Move
Yes it does hurt, BUT you are not doing anything wrong to feel guilty about. In fact, you can be a supportive friend and help and encourage him to network with other asexuals, and be part of an asexual community. There is a woman who is perfect for him in every way just waiting to be found by him.
We was just ingaged tho
His choices are see a doctor or deal with his dick tearing on the reg… He should see a doctor. My ex had a thing where his foreskin fused with itself in a weird spot. The fix was circumcision which he did go through with because fuck tearing it every time he had sex.
I do not text my neighbors like that. When he unsent messages..girl wake up and smell the inappropriate. Ask the mom what's up..also bear in mind that you state clearly that you are not upset with her but wanted clarity on the situation and wanted to hear her side. You do not under any circumstance give her time to contact him to see what he said OK?
You dodged a bullet. Keep driving and block his number. You are too old, mature, and busy to be dealing with this bullshit controlling behavior. This is just a hint at what's to come. It starts small, but next thing you know you won't be allowed to leave the house, have to cook and clean, no friends or social life.
He's already covering his tracks by stating that he was “joking” and that she was somehow “offended” by something he said. My guess is he's afraid that OP will find out he was saying something suggestive or was blatantly coming on to the neighbor and he's already coming up with excuses. My money says the husband was coming on to the neighbor and she not only deflected his advances, she changed her schedule (or pretended she did) in order to avoid him.
Your recollection for detail on this tends to give evidence that you did more than just look briefly. You may think you were being subtle, but apparently you weren't. However, it wasn't all that professional for the job advisor to mention it. Perhaps she called this out to let you know how inappropriate it was. The last thing she'd want is to find you a job then watch you lose that job because of the same behavior. Believe it or not it's uncomfortable to be looked at all the time in the workplace.
You tell him that it’s coming from a place I’d love and you can’t date him if he doesnt address this. But tbh it sounds like he’s already been resistant to that!
How long have you been together? Is this worth all this effort and exhaustion?
That’s just unnecessarily rude man, no reason to treat OP like an idiot because she’s in a relationship with a man that tricked her into thinking he was decent
I think it’s likely and ego thing and insecurities. The reality is you took your issues out on her likely making her feel really shitty then broke up with her making her likely feel shitty about herself. So she found someone who made her feel good for a night. It sounds pretty reasonable to me. You were broken up. She was single. If you really want to be with her you’ll have to let it go. She didn’t do anything wrong. If you ever try to make her feel like she did you will have no chance with her at all
You could simply tell him you like the word “curvy” more than you like the word “chubby”. Sounds like he wants to say the right thing to make you feel good, but may need some help knowing what your language preference is. Do him a favor and be direct.
She has known him for a quarter of a century and she has never seen anything like that.
But she did she this:
I tried to be nice and suggested him and his partner come with us and he told me he wouldn't ever want to go anywhere and be seen with a “loser like me”.
NO ONE could talk sh!t about my husband like that to me face and I not stand up and scratch their eyes out. Metaphorically speaking, of course. At the very least your wife should have said a very affronted EXCUSE ME? Apologize or GTFO!
Your wife just let him call you a loser after you graciously invited him and his husband to the trip?? His husband just sat there and let him say this without calling him out on his rudeness?? Well birds of a feather flock together, looks like you need a new flock because all these people are some species of MEAN.
Okay ya, so he is just a straight up liar and phony? You found out he had all these huge lies because you were catching him in other smaller lies? listen to yourself, this is not a trustworthy person.
Even if you got him to admit to everything, you can't trust him farther than you can throw him. He is perfectly fine lying to you about big and small things, that wont just change. it is in his morals and values.
It sounds like a threesome, and some of those day trips where he said it was her and a coworker were also probably sex. With her alone, or her and the boyfriend.
Duh. It’s Jesus.
Please consider the drain this man is on you. You've been with him long enough to know that you need to make a choice between forever dealing with him like this (or worse) or leaving. You have said no, and he pushes. He doesn't care about your feelings. Otherwise he wouldn't still push the issue. You might not be in a place to have a functioning relationship due to things you've dealt with, especially not with someone who doesn't respect you and support you. Don't settle for conditional love.
It's not locked AFAIK… You KNOW he's just using you for sex. I mean, it doesn't appear there is any relationship at all.
If sex is all you want, you do you. But if you want a loving partnership, you probably need to look elsewhere. This guy isn't it.
Wow. So much happened in a couple weeks.
Don't commit to someone after not even 24 hours of having met them for the first time, one. Secondly, this is a lot of emotional power to give to someone whom you barely know. Please try and let these feelings go.
I get that you want something serious, thought she was great, etc., but you're 18. You don't really know what you want.
Third, getting a hotel room the first night you met? I would have gone home after dinner. Seems like there was a lot of pressure from both sides.
Also,
she unfortunately couldn’t stay and I ended up dropping her home at 5.00AM and went back to the hotel.
We ended up meeting a while later around 11.30 or so
What? She couldn't stay over so at 5 AM you drove her home?? But then she was able to meet up 6 hours later? This is wild.
Try and move on, good luck!
Yes it definitely can, but it gets better easier when both people are comfortable with sex.. he has to deal with a lot of hang ups and shame, it’s an uphill battle… good luck tho
I don't, but when I'm looking for something like that, I search it and read the reviews.
He cheated and he’s blaming you so you don’t blame him.
He cheated and he’s blaming you so you don’t blame him.
Get a ring. Propose. Let her get excited. Break up with her and tell everyone you found out she cheated and lied. Start bringing new girl around friend group, and make sure to make passive aggressive comments about how good it feels to have good sex, good communication and someone in your life who isn’t a lying cheat. Enjoy your life.
Pack up her stuff and tell her to go home. Her behavior is asinine and she will escalate. Soon you won’t be allowed to be around friends at all because you don’t tell her what you talked about to her liking so you’ll just stop going. And of course she doesn’t have a job. Who would hire her? She’s a loon.
I think you're right. I've tried so naked on trying to save this relationship but it's impossible when the effort is so one sided. I need to think about an exit strategy, which won't be easy because I moved a bunch of states away from my home state to be with him. First thing I'll do is just save money and try to think of what else I can do. I also need to work on detaching myself from him, which has been easy emotionally because I don't get much love from him anyways to even be emotionally attached at this point. :/ It's funny that you say I'm his punching bag because that's literally what I used to say to him “I'm not your punching bag” literally since we first got together I would say that.
LOL this dude crying to try to get you to let him fuck other girls 😀
If it works he deserves a medal of some sort. Hes so full of shit