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AxelXMistyMinx, 22 y.o.
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Let's face it, he might not fall into the actual pedophile official description, but he is a fucking pedo.
You say he's 21…are you sure you didn't mean 12?
My boyfriend said there is inherently a power dynamic in relationships, and that “typically if a man and women want different things, what the man wants is what should happen”
He's actively telling you that he will never see you as an equal in your relationship. This is something you obviously find upsetting, which is valid.
i said women aren’t cars, and he said “it’s an analogy, do u need to pull up a dictionary for what ‘analogy’ means?”.
This is a tactic to undermine you and your feelings. He knows you don't think he meant women are literally cars. He knows you understand what an analogy is. He just doesn't care what you have to say and wants you to feel like you are wrong, he must always be right.
he didn’t answer and began ignoring me
That's another tactic to try and establish control. “You aren't going to agree with me? Fine. I don't agree with you existing outside of the role and behaviors I've assigned you. You don't get to exist as a person until I've deemed you worthy of acknowledgement.”
he got upset and said i always need to argue and can never just be agreeable and nice. i said “i specifically didn’t wanna tell u this because i said i didn’t wanna argue” and he said “yea you do wanna argue always”
He's telling you what he's decided is reality, specifically in a way to paint himself as the victim instead of you.
i got super upset went to leave his room to go to the bathroom, he asked where i was going, and i said “i’m removing myself to prove i don’t wanna argue”. he followed me and told me to go back to his room and i was washing my hands, so i said “you go” and made a swatting motion with my wet hand which got water droplets on him. he said “that’s it, you’re going home” and drove me home.
So he's allowed to ignore you, but how DARE you ignore him???? Just imagine you two married and him getting upset for something stupid and throwing you and possibly children out. If he treats you like this, how would he treat your potential children? (If y'all wanted kids, of course, may not be a factor, but still important to consider.)
i feel fucking crazy, this was last night and we haven’t talked since, and he said he won’t be talking to me until i apologize, and if i don’t we can break up. I love him but i can’t do this for my whole life.
Yeah, thats what emotional abuse does. It makes you feel crazy. You have nothing to apologize for, but he's trying to make you feel like the aggressor when he's instigated everything.
what can i do to express how his behavior was ridiculous ? im horrible at arguing with him because he drives my head in absolute circles.
You can break up with him. Sounds harsh, but its your only option. He drives your head in circles due to the emotionally abusive tactics he uses to try and break you down and follow him without question, just like he warned you he believed was required of you.
You can't reason with people like him, because they don't care.
The characters name is: Yoruichi Shihōin The character is dark skinned Asian
If the character was black I would understand it coming off as bad.
But Kate being black is allowed to have her feelings and people who aren’t black won’t understand.
But the thing is – the character she is dressing up as, is in fact Japanese. She herself, is an Asian person that tans. What is the problem with that?
Don't crash the party like op above said. You'll get thrown, you'll look like a jackass, and it will be embarrassing.
You should probably break up with her.
She will instinctively know you don’t find her attractive, we’re not stupid and guys are really unsubtle about things like this, so all the time you’re trying to pretend she’s a 10 when you’re in bed, you’re destroying her self esteem
Why did you start dating her if she’s not your type? Why didn’t you walk away before it got to this stage?
When you do break up, make the emphasis on your issues: tell her you can’t date until you’ve sorted out your porn addiction. Or tell her you’ve got too much going on in your life to be dating.
Tell her any fucking thing as long as it’s not how repulsive you find her because you will destroy any chances of her loving herself enough to date in the future if you do let it slip.
And in future don’t lie to yourself and “settle” for some poor girl because you want any old girlfriend.
He won't change his mind. He's stalling.
… you are dead on. I needed this reminder. Thank you.
“Held of cheating for a very long time” lol are you a serial cheater?
I think if nothing else, you should perhaps reach out to Gabbie and let her know your wife is sabotaging her career and reputation, and that she can use you as a reference if she wants (or at least know you are not doing this to her).
As for your wife, she sounds like she’s acting crazy if all you said is true. That’s a very serious character flaw that I personally wouldn’t want to deal with, let alone be a person raising my kid.
If your sister or anyone else can vouch for Gabbie, and your gut knows Gabbie is innocent, then maybe you need to end this relationship or get your wife in therapy plus apologize to Gabbie.
Sorry you’re dealing with this. Even if your wife was 100% correct that Gabbie had a crush on you, this is not how an adult deals with that situation.
Thank you. I see all these ppl saying leave her she’s disgusting. Would love to hear the wife’s side if this is real.
You just say hey dad I got to talk to you about something in private. Me and my buddies were fucking around and we took a DNA test and I’m half Chinese. Are you have Chinese too? Is Mom?
Not even the plastic ones!
Along with stopping doing everything, read and also have your husband read the 80/80 Marriage.
yeah he constantly says he does & thinks im not attracted to him bc of sex but i am i just don’t think i have to have sex all the time to prove a point
You can't really change who she is and what she does. In the end it is her life and her body and if she wants to show off herself in lingerie than you can't really do much to stop that.
You can only decide whether this crosses a boundary for you, and come to accept that she is not the kind of partner you're looking for.
This is so laughable this guy thinks taking out the trash and cleaning the litter box as equatable to what he has listed she does. He probably left out a huge number of things she does that he doesn’t even notice.
Has he ever seen a psychiatrist? He doesn't sound stable. I'm not being insulting, I'm being serious.
In any case, follow through with what you said in your last text. Get away from him. It'll take months to stop thinking about him every day, possibly several months, but you need to get him out of your head. Find a guy that doesn't jerk you around like this.
I think I’ve done a poor job at explaining as I was trying not to ramble, so I just want to give a bit more depth here and hopefully answer your questions. – she was the one who invited him to on-line with us. she did so without asking if it was okay with me first and we had only been together a couple months. They were friends, this wasn’t a case of her living with him for my sake. – when we broke up, all of us sat down as a group to talk about what our plan would be and talked with the other housemates about how they felt about it etc. my best friend wanting him to leave was out of protectiveness of me, but I made it clear that I did not want anyone put out. – I stayed with my parents for only a few days, and then came back hence him staying on the couch in the spare room. I only left to go overseas after he had somewhere else lined up to on-line. This all happened over a span of only 2 weeks (I was away for 5 days). – I handed in 2 months of notice, because I didn’t want to put anyone out. Myself and my ex continued to pay rent for this period so that no one in the house would be affected financially by what was going on. – I don’t expect to still be in contact with my ex, that’s poor wording on my part, I was trying to express how it hurts doubly to have lost them both at the same time.
I appreciate your viewpoint honestly, this has been a tough one to navigate and I know there’s things I could’ve done better. As I’m sure you can imagine there are a lot more details that I haven’t gone into in this post.
OP sorry this happened to you but honestly from a stranger I'm proud u actually give a shit enough about yourself to not stay with someone like this lord if u see how many men devalue themselves by staying with partners like this.
You honestly deserve better. I know it hurts and it will because you are human and you cared. But there is better out there for you, u might not see it now but trust me there is. You just focus on yourself and heal!
Stop making excuses for him. It's not his adhd he just doesn't care.
I've dealt with your situation. I will not mistreat my children's mother to make someone else more comfortable. That said, that relationship needs more and stricter boundaries when you have a partner. Open phone policy and you have to let your ex know that if it's not about parenting, she should not do it. Ignoring it works sometimes but she should not be sending it.
GF needs to chill and accept that you have to coparent. It's not always going to be perfect where she can police your thoughts and speech, but she should have input on boundaries. That you initiated the divorce is an Ace for sure.
Finally, you need to come to peace with the idea that you may not be successful dating until your boy leaves home, but even then this kinda stuff is still going to come up.
Done!
OP do you know who Chris Hansen is? Would your girlfriend like to meet him?
Dude why did you even HAVE that video still? Does your ex know? You showed a video of her performing a sex act to someone else—your new girlfriend, no less?
This is the creepiest fucking thing I've ever read. I'm sorry, I know you think it was some “drunken mistake” but you shouldn't have even held onto that video in the first place.
Example: BF makes $50K and you make $250K
Rent is $5500 per month. You pay $4400 and he pays $1100 of the rent per month.
Utilities are $500. You pay $400 and he pays $100.
You are saving $1200 per month and he is saving $900 per month on rent (unknown on utilities).
If you all cook, groceries are split 50/50. Household chores are split 50/50.
What does not letting it go look like?