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Hi. So the way I see it, it will be a lot harder to get over him if you don't confront it. I wouldn't admit your feelings persay, but I would casually ask him out. Like just say “Hey we're both single, and like eachothers company, we should go out.” I understand your friends saying not to say anything, but I think to get through it you'll have to ask him out.
Everything else is easy, I guess I’m just not good at handjobs
So now is your chance to do something for him.
You dump him, and tell him that now he’s cheated on all but one of his exes.
We aren’t official. She doesn’t want to date we agreed to be honest and just let each other know if/when we do not want to be exclusive or hookup w other people
Obviously I hope It was a typo… The word aromantic comes from the prefix a-, meaning “not,” and romantic, which in this context means “relating to romance.” The word aromantic is not to be confused with aromatic, which means “having an aroma; fragrant or sweet-scented; odoriferous.”
So what you're saying is you're actually not, infact, aromantic at all. What you are, my dude, is an attention starved child who latched on to the first person who even hinted that they would give you attention. You now don't want that attention, and you're using the term “atomantic” to come across as less of a ass for simply not being interested in her the way you thought you were.
Whether you're a girl or boy has no relevance here. You're still acting like an idiot and you need to end your “relationship”.
It’s a big goal of hers, so she has every right to chase it. And as far as debt goes most of her income goes into school and she gets tons of scholarships and grants
Have they told you WHY they don't enjoy hanging out with them?
Probably because his word should be enough with his partner/wife given that orher forms of birth control exist. I'm not sure why everyone here is requiring that he also has to have surgery in order for his feelings on more children to be valid.
I'm open to having children, but ok with not. My girlfriend does not want to have children. Should she be required to get her tubes tied before marriage like all you people are suggesting for OP?
I feel like you are dragging your feet op. You aren’t going to get her to stop asking. If she does stop asking you should be worried because that when she will be planning her exit strategy and be done waiting for you. You need to have a very honest and open conversation with her and be prepared for her to leave if what you both want out of this relationship is different.
What's the plan for the house when you move? Will it have to be condemned? Are you going to try to sell it? Is there a reason why animal control or health inspectors haven't been called? There's no way that environment is healthy for any of you.
Is it possible to get a tiny place in your new city and commute into the city for the weekdays and only return on the weekends?
Can your current place be cleaned by the guys you see on Hoarders with the hazmat suits? Didn't the people you used to work with complain about the smell? How do you stop that from happening at your new job? Did your daughter never have any friends over?
It doesn’t sound confusing at all. He’s asked for time and you should respect the request. If you’re the one who broke things off and are now coming back, his request is reasonable. Either you’ll wait for him or you won’t, but there’s no reason to accuse him of Plato g games when all he’s done is ask for some time to figure out whether or not he’s comfortable being vulnerable with you again.
I have had gfs do this with platonic friends and friends I’ve had crushes on, and it made me resent them. Never cheated tho ?♀️
OP, this is toxic and a terrible example to set for your kids. They deserve a mother who has a partner that respects her enough to never have the audacity of sleeping with her best friend. What the two of them did was disgusting and at this time you have detached yourself emotionally from feeling pain over your marriage being officially over. Do yourself a favor and divorce. What’s done is done but this was the choice they made the moment they sat down with you and made you make a choice of the unthinkable. Everything ended exactly at that moment because they became cheaters (or possibly have been cheating, I don’t know). But to now give you MORE grief and MORE pain over their selfish wishes not being fulfilled. How pathetic is your husband to say: “bOO hoo! You’re not being nice to me anymore!!” )): Well that’s too damn bad. If I could give you a hug, I absolutely would. Sounds like you’ve been put through the ringer but it’s time to let go and find better for yourself now. Your kids will be okay.
You’re really acting shocked that she might be hurt by her husband and father of her children suddenly bringing up non-monogamy? That’s the kind of thing you bring before even entering an exclusive relationship, let alone a marriage.
Your wife's fantasies quite possibly include a father figure.
Oh, He's weak. I see. And you're so strong that's what gives you the right to call someone weak. Pathetic. You very disgusting after reading most of your comments. I don't see you meeting the “right guy ” with this your stupid way of life
Are you a free thinker type who also gets their advice from a website with boner pill pop up ads?
Idea: Create a group text with you, your wife, both moms, and any relevant siblings.
Write (from wife's phone, with her full knowledge and permission) that she feels so lucky to have so many important people in her life, that she loves her entire family, and will never choose one family member over another. She will sometimes choose one person's advice over another person's, but she makes her decisions based on the advice and not on her feelings for the person who gives it. Add that this is an exciting but emotional time for everyone, and that as a heavily pregnant person she would rather everyone move past this evening's fight, apologize if they feel they can, and continue to lovingly await the entrance of the family's newest member.
I'd only do this from your wife's phone so it will show up on the message as being from her, even if you draft it, so you're not accused of putting words in her mouth.
Will assorted relatives be adult about this? Well, some probably will. But this gets the ball out of your and your wife's court.
As everyone else said. This is the start. Reversal and love bombing. She'll go back to being mad about chores and attention and being her mean self again in no time. This is a common manipulation cycle.
Get her out of your space now. Let her get real therapy on her own and away from you. She's just reversing because the gravy train is over and she can't have that.
Nope. But still just as bad and makes me want to jump off a bridge.
I confronted her and was honest about how I feel and apologized for bottling it all up. I ended my rant with I'm sorry but I love and I meant what I said when I want to spend my life with you. Her response to all that? “I'm not sure where I see our relationship. Part of me feels I've outgrown it.” I asked if her wanted to end things. She said she didn't know. I packed my overnight gear and left for my dad's house cause I don't want to be alone tonight. She didn't even try to stop me or ask where I was going. Fucking coward.
Thanks, I agree, and it isn’t love.
We are already doing therapy, but even if that somehow works which at this point I don’t see happening, I think things that are fundamentally who he is like this family situation will be too much.
I mostly wanted to know if I was expecting something unreasonable but the more I think about it and think back on all the other times he hasn’t treated my family half as good as they treat him or I treat his family (even though they don’t treat me as well), the more I realize the problem is larger than his being rude about my niece and nephew.
What do you think would’ve been different if you had sex before marriage? The reason I’m curious is that she’s a current wife rather than an ex.
Even when we had a little hiccup earlier in the relationship, he gave me a second chance, and i wasn't going to blow it!
That was around the time he developed the allergy.
I mean… what's done is done. Everything lined up with your infidelity/hiccup with your ex. He's not allergic to you. He's stressed out around you.
Just do better for your next relationship.
Whether you have been married 6 minutes, 6 weeks or 6 years, you should not be treated like this. Do not have any children with this man. Please get away with this man. Someone who is threatening to take a knife to you is not someone you can be living with. What you need is support, a bit of therapy, and I congratulate you for having left one abusive partner and realising what danger signs are. You know deep down that you are seeing those same signs now and you have to leave this. Please get out and please update us.
No love. Get out. This dude isn't good for u. And if you are ace you really need to find someone that is gonna be more accepting of you and your needs. Someone you can actually build a life with that's the same.
Him pushing you into shit. Pisses me off and I'm just a stranger. Please take care of yourself and get away from this man nd his emotionally abusive ass.
You never can be sure. Love is the craziest thing we do
I’m coming to this late but I hope you see this message. It’s going to be very hot, but listen to all the people who are telling you to move on, cut the cord and don’t look back. You have to do that. And don’t rebound right into another relationship. Find other things to occupy your time. Get in shape, volunteer, do some thing to fill the hole that’s going to be in your life for a while. Let it heal and then move on. Do not go back to this girl. Never. Never.
I guarantee you that 99.99% of people who have been through something significant in their life that they lost, or got hurt, all of those people eventually feel just fine and even better off. It just takes time. You will get there.
Why did you text him? Frankly I wouldn't even date you for doing that to your friend in the first place, you already proven you have no morals. You already proved that for some cheap thrill you're willing to destroy relationships, so why should your bf be different?
Good on him.
Why did you text him? Frankly I wouldn't even date you for doing that to your friend in the first place, you already proven you have no morals. You already proved that for some cheap thrill you're willing to destroy relationships, so why should your bf be different?
Good on him.