my (38f) husband (39m) booked a 10k vacation package without telling me
Hi there, I'm going to try and keep this as short as I can.
Apparently, my husband booked a $10,000 vacation package back in 2020 without telling me. It's a 3 night “bungalow over the water” thing at the Sandals resort in Jamaica; we're supposed to go this December. He put $2500 down on a deposit and it's non-refundable. He waited until the last possible second and told me about it this week. If we end up going we're going to need to throw even more money at the trip and book airfare and get passports.
He's trying to pitch it as a “once of a lifetime experience” that he booked for our 20th wedding anniversary and his 40th birthday… but it's really all about him. I'm not a big fan of traveling at all- it just gives me more anxiety than it does any relaxation. My most hated travel destination is the beach; he knows this very well. This is a vacation he wants to take more than anything, not me.
Thinking about spending this much money on such a short vacation, to somewhere I don't even want to go, makes me nauseous. It's a waste of money. I keep thinking about how much better off we'd be putting that money anywhere else. He says we can cancel if I really want, but the deposit will, of course, be gone. All the while he's saying this he gives me these puppy dog eyes like I'll be crushing his dreams if I say cancel it.
I've talked with my friends and family about it and they just tell me that I should be happy that he did it. I'm not happy that he did it. He made a huge decision without consulting me or considering my preferences; I feel manipulated to say we'll go. I feel like I'm between a rock and a naked place. Should I just pretend to be happy and go?