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Cheesburger Jesus here with a few of my colombian friends, 20 y.o.
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Mid-life crises. Gotta love 'em.
I would advise her that there's a strong likelihood her asking your friend out would damage or perhaps destroy your relationship with your friend. Your mom will then have to ask herself whether she wants to put her silly teenage crush ahead of her relationship with her daughter. At least ask her to give things another week or two to think things through.
But at the end of the day, they're adults and it's their business. There's nothing you can really do. 18-year-old guys are easily distractible and move from one thing to the next very quickly. It's doubtful even if they did go out that it would last that long. If it comes to it, I'd have some tolerance for mom's stupid antics and let her make her mistakes. One way or another, she's going to feel really foolish and you can sit on your high horse and say “I told you so” and you'd be completely right.
The holidays are coming up, might be a good time to get her a smart watch that vibrates on her wrist
It seems like you guys are growing apart. That’s not unheard of in early/mid 20s. I think you need a broader conversation about values and how you’ll chose to live!, fight, raise children, etc.
I know it’s hard but I think you have to consider you’re just moving in different directions as you grow up.
Yeah she had said earlier she had a migraine and a rough day and missed me. I had been trying to show her I love her and am ready to open up and work towards a forever life.
Now I really just don’t want to be here
Doing my best in career regardless or the earning class has NOTHING to do with if I want it in my private life or not
thank you! and you’re right, cant help someone who doesnt help themselves. i think ive just been projecting my expectations onto for far too long and thats why im disappointed. i should come to terms with the fact that he will never be the friend i expect him to be, and hes not gonna emotionally mature just because i nudge. the last time i confront him he got all defensive and just flipped the script. i guess wont throw in the towel i guess, but im just not gonna try that hard anymore.
Around 9 months. I know it seems rushed, I guess I was looking at my friends and their spouses who got married fast and are still together but looks like this relationship is just a red flag.
You sound like a self righteous jerk! Leave and co-parent and live! your life the way you want! Not difficult….find a place to stay and move on
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I stole it from someone else in this sub too!
Wow… so the relationship switches from one toxic behavior to another.
Run.
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If this is something that is just how you are as a person and haven’t tried to change it/ don’t want to change it, then you guys probably don’t match up good.
You swim
then why are you asking if he was upset?
You said he didnt seem to be upset and he got a blowjob outta it.
What more do you want from a FWB? Isnt that the whole point? No strings attached?
How was his first divorce? He probably doesn’t want to repeat that.
Thank you for this response. I was waiting for someone to be a grown up.
People can't really HELP what they're sexually attracted to. It gets baked in there in some funky ways sometimes. They shouldn't be shamed for it. What they CAN help is what they do IRL – are they shitty to real women? Then that sucks. Do they fantasize about making sexy women do whatever they want? Well… so do lots and lots and lots of people… ?♀️
2 kids in 10mos…not twins I’m assuming?? Damn! Your poor body haha ?? you deserve the hottest, best, most luxurious bath ever after such a feat.
Honestly honey- he hasn’t been a father for a month. That would require him to actively take part in raising his child. He sure as hell donated the sperm, but he’s not a father. You’re in physical pain and he sounds essentially useless.
It sounds to me like you’d be better off finding out what your options are. Because even if you decide to stay with him- and I wouldn’t, for the record- trust me when I tell you that at least if you’re divorced you won’t expect help from him.
I've found a woman who actually understands me. Funnily enough, she is emotional enough for both of us!
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She actually got mad when I asked her why she didn't accept my request after she asked me how I knew she had a Snapchat after sending her a friend request so I replied because you didn't accept my Facebook request. Now I'm being called manipulative and a narcissist am I missing something ?
Hold up, o think I must have read it wrong and thought you were pregnant, if you are not pregnant then I still stand with see this a red flag and maybe rethink your relationship before moving forward…
Are you kidding me?
How are you still like “We plan to gave children” after finding shit like that?
I see now. I called him while he's there (this is playing out live! ) to tell him the movie times and I know when I'm down and depressed it can be heard in my voice (even when I don't mean it to be) and he picked up on it and said “whats going on with you?” I said “nothing ill see you later” and he responded “ill be home later”. I wanted to say “um idk maybe bc I cleared out my day for your bday and I'm here alone” but I refrained but tonight is gonna be awkard bc I can feel myself shutting down
Yeah. But for 6 months every time he saw me he asked me out. That’s not something you do when it’s just looks. If I was a guy and a girl rejects me once I would be done unless there’s something more that I feel
OP, some years ago I met a man with a younger son. The mad was perfectly likeable. Maybe a little clingy with his father but I appreciated he needed his Dad and would always be his fathers priority.
I’d never dated a man with kids of his own. I love kids, figured it wouldn’t be an issue opening my heart to another soul, but failed to recognise that some of my personality traits would affect this relationship. I’m territorial, both emotionally and environmentally; as time went on I would get snippy about my things being treated with disregard, I didn’t like that when his son stayed my bf had to give 100% of his attention to him, and I’d get jealous, it was very unattractive and unseemly for someone my age and I dislike what it said about me. I understood his son would always be his priority and that if I couldn’t get my head out of my arse then I was the problem. We broke up because I knew I couldn’t get past it and have avoided men with children of their own ever since.
I don’t believe I’m a bad person, but I know my limitations and refuse to inflict myself on a child. As the adult in your relationship at the time. You should have made the call when your partner started mistreating your daughter; shame on you. You’re meant to be her defender and advocate – if you can’t, who will be?
I have a daughter who is 11 and her father went on to have two children with his new wife, so basically my daughter is like yours in this scenario. Ever since my daughter was little she has been begging me not to make her go to her dad’s. Always says she misses me and just wants to stay with me. I didn’t want to be seen as the bio mum who kept her child from her father, so until recently I have always just made her go. She’s not in any danger there, they’re a nice family and are actually linked through my BIL (her dad is an old friend of my BIL), but I’ve always had this gut feeling that her step mum doesn’t 100% truly accept her, even though on the surface she seems to be nice to her. Anyway so this week I decided that enough is enough and I emailed her dad to say I would like to let her choose if she goes there.
Anyway so you have to be prepared to potentially lose your relationship with your daughter over this, is all I’m trying to say.
She's the love of my life and I don't know what to do anymore, because I can't change the past.
That's the issue here, you went in with the assumption that your past doesn't matter because you can't change it. In relationships, we don't get to make those decisions for other people.
We all have things that we aren't proud of and if we hide it from our partners and they find out 10 years down the line, it's our own fault for hiding it. She would have never dated you had she known this history and you tricked her into doing something through lying by ommission and now are devastated that your lie caught up with you.
I may not sound like it, but I do feel really sad for you, but you should have brought this up 10 years ago and then dated someone else who accepted you for you and all your past.
He sounds lazy. You do all the work. What are you getting out of this? It sounds like you're chasing a man around.
You should probably worry less about what other people think. The standard for engagement is usually about two years into a relationship (often after living together for at least 12 months). But you do need to focus more on making this relationship work and not so much on what your family, society or your friends think. You seem way too invested in the external appearance of things.
i explained everything to my friend they agreed that boundaries have been broken and maybe him and this friend shouldnt talk for a while.
That's not how boundaries work. You have your boundaries and if you find your boyfriend breaks your boundaries then you break up with him.
That's how boundaries work. You cannot tell him that he needs to set boundaries. You can only show him the consequences of breaking your boundaries.
It sounds like this is not a good relationship for you if you are in a constant state of insecurity.
This is something we have spoken about and she has been to individual counseling before but seemed to find issue with them or their approach.
Yes you are the only one who thinks that.
Your need to ask your wife where her head is these days (stop laughing everyone) with respect to your marriage and how do you move forward. You need to think thru the conversation in advance to ensure you have all questions you may want to ask noted. If she talks about your snooping, remember two things: 1. This is far worse, and 2. She left the paper trail. On a family computer.
She's either bonkers or she was trying to bonk someone else that night and you showing up fucked up her plans.
Either way… Find someone better.