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Model from: lk
Languages: en
Birth Date: 1992-05-16
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
Eyes color: eyeColorBrown
Subculture: subcultureRomantic
Unpopular opinion: you guys shouldn't get married.
Look. Everything he has said, even partially, you have also said exist.
You are financially unstable. You have communication issues that haven't resolved themselves. He doesn't want to just slap on a “married” sticker and hope that fixes shit. It doesn't. Hell, if anything, things cost more when you get married.
The wedding. The honeymoon, the new place because the old place doesn't have room for future babies, etc.
Marriage, just like having a baby, doesn't magically fix real issues in a relationship. It's been eight years and y'all are having issues that a lot of couples work through one or two years in. He has a sensible head and doesn't want to rush in with a Shakey bedrock to marriage. You at least want a plan in place for the future instead of trying to focus on what is wrong now.
You guys have the time under your belt but it sounds like you two are pretty incompatible in how you see your future working, let alone what's important in the near future. Either get to a couples therapist yesterday, or just split before y'all waste even more of each other's time.
You're not a bad person. I didn't read a single response that even implied that you are. I know from personal experience how difficult it is to deal with the end of a marriage. Please take care of yourself.
He may not have specifically said that he was at the end of his tether. But you've been physically present for the entirety of the relationship. You directly observed how much your spouse was putting into the marriage and how much he was receiving. He needed you to be there for him and that should have happened before he pulled the plug.
.
So “living in (double) sin” is okay, but “making honest men of each other” is a problem? That’s some really impressive mental gymnastics. Hopefully he sprained something.
So he said he thinks he’s smarter than you, are you going to prove it by staying with him?
Sorry, I meant replacement *for* the mommy.
She is far too young to have these issues. She's going to need significant therapy and possibly medical treatment. She's not in a place for a relationship right now, and may not be for years if ever.
Are you prepared for a lifetime of this? Of constantly subordinating your wants and desires to another person? Because that's where this is headed. And the toll of constant sexual rejection is going to take a toll on your mental and physical health. And how long before you start to resent her? What happens then?
I would end the relationship.
The swinging offer was decidedly out of left field: but why in the heck did your husband blame you for it? ? I mean I imagine you got home, still weirded out, telling him about this like it was weird because “Uh, I really just needed to take a piss, thanks but no thanks!” And yet, he’s freaking out on you?
You brought the sexy popcorn, didn’t you?
(Good looooord)
There’s nothing to work out. You’re completely incompatible
Yessssss
OP in 3 years “my fiancé’s dog mauled our baby and she thinks I’m a monster for letting the government euthanize her baby”.
This is woman is playing with fire.
How am I supposed to have any real intimacy with somebody if I have to hide my true feelings? I want to be accepted for who I really am. I dont want to go through life lying to people and hiding things. Id rather die alone.
This seems like one of the easiest decisions you could make.
All of this made more sense when I noticed your explanation that she is white and he is blue. My immediate instinct is she rejected him and either has chosen to keep her distance and made this up about work, or the work thing is true but she probably (not definitely) doesn't actually want to start anything with him. Mainly because this is similar to how I would handle it if a married man approached me. I don't think you necessarily need to be worried about her, she said “see you around!” implying that she doesn't have plans to spend any time with him. But the unsent messages set off alarm bells for me even before I noticed the context of who is who.
You're definitely not unreasonable for being suspicious at the very least. I hope I'm wrong but I couldn't ignore this and I think you should at least keep it under review or press him for more information. You might find he drip feeds you some truths to try and get you to drop it. If that happens, there's likely more he isn't telling you.
I'm sp happy that you and your cat are safe
He has been an assict, he is an addict and he wants to stay in this still.
So his choice is clear.
OP, why chose someone rather than your own safety! And instead chose HIS comfort and addiction?
WHAT do you know what he did over all those years you havent found out yet?
Get yourself checked for sexually transmittable diseases, btw. HIV, HPV, etc!