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It’s not unusual to go on dates with someone you don’t really ‘want’. Know your own value and don’t go chasing phantoms. I know too many couples where they lack intimacy which stems from them never really being a great match
Is OP Nick Cannon?
You either stay together and work through it or end the relationship and move on. No breaks. It never ends well—as you have learned. Thus endeth the lesson.
I'm so confused, OP. You have the internet. Have you never heard of 23 and Me or other similar, fairly inexpensive DNA tests. Like, why wasn't that your first idea? Need someone to google it for you?
I'm confused. Why do you want to continue a relationship with, let alone get engaged/married to, someone who lied, cheated, went no contact for several days? Also, there is no way she was with this guy kissing, making out and “cuddling” for several days without sex. You may think you can read her but you just don't want to see the truth in this situation. Have some self respect and end this relationship.
Your wife is cheating on you, don't bother with the evidence, you won't find it anyway
we are in digital time, the shots are ready in a few days and he hasn't shown you a picture for a month
What are they doing?
Depending on how the size matched him, cross dressing feels like it might be the case. What kind of work hookup has sex in a car and then doesn’t put their bra or panties back on?
Only details that are important on that is its enough to get him mandatory time if convicted. These days with what ordinary drugs are laced with, one never really knows for sure what they’re trafficking. Coke dealers are sometimes unwittingly peddling fentanyl.
I asked her that before. She said “Obviously not. I’m his cousin”
No arguments, but what we were living in before was a room that fit a queen bed without walking space so not much personal space
I mean, we're only getting OP's side of the story her, we don't know if she's off or not?
I think you'd be better off asking in r/marriage or something, not here.
Yeah, all that matters is you and her’s relationship and how you both feel about it.
Or, your game is wack, one or the other. I’m kinda kidding, the first is the adult answer, but you are being a petulant child, so the second it the childish answer.
Do the best with what you’ve got. And be your best shiny happy self. But beyond that, don’t go there with an attitude or bearing that apologises of feels inferior because you have had some hardships. You are a whole person, not an accessory. Treat yourself like one, and expect the sake of others, even if self-esteem is new to you.
No one is ever entitled to sex, even if he does all of the housework and the neighbour's while he's at it.
I don't think dinner and drinks are what this guy is worried about.
You suggest to her specific things you want her to do then go from there.
The pattern of consistently attracting abuse and allowing it to take place is not one that I believe I will never break.
I'm sorry but what the hell?
Abuse victims go to therapy, break this pattern, and live full lives with supportive loving partners. They do this all the time. Every day. This is a psychology problem there are answers and fixes for. This is a common problem they fix. Your low self esteem is like therapy 101, not a complex issue.
Your attitude is not based in reality.
I mean i guess you could try getting re-baptized
I think it restores your purity or something like that
Truthfully, I wouldn’t bother
If she feels this strongly about something like this, it just doesn’t sound like it would be a relationship you’d mutually be happy in long term
It’s like getting mad at you that you broke a bone in your youth and she only wants somebody who has never don’t that…
Just let this one go ?
If it's a dealbreaker for you, break up and skip the cheating part. The second you really consider cheating, this relationship is over.
Future solutions: better job, extra job, move some place cheap.
SIL: obviously the family has let this go on and she does what she wants when she wants. There have been no consequences. If I were MIL, I'd charge money to sit the kid. SIL just drops off and picks up like any other day care. Treat SIL like she is a stranger.
But if you angled your phone away and someone asked you about it, wouldn't you answer honestly? You said he just completely avoided the question. Why would he do that if it were nothing?
This is the biggest red flag in your post:
I felt uncomfortable asking again.
Why would you want to be in a relationship with someone you can't openly talk to? Is this the only time that's been an issue?
Throw out the whole boyfriend… He's broken!
what i’m saying ☠️
Exactly what I was thinking.
You can start with confirming boundaries and establish your position and suspensions. If you feel like you cannot trust him, are you comfortable with breaking up.
That’s because a lot of disorders and chronic conditions are known to be exacerbated by the negative affects of obesity. It’s like complaining of chronic lung issues but refusing to stop smoking, and then complaining that doctors aren’t taking you seriously.
I see this exact scenario over and over..I can only help you for the next time. So here is what you do to avoid this problem again. When someone breaks up with you, you let them go and dont get back together. Its not going to work out the second, third, fourth, hundredth time you get back together. Save yourself the trouble
You're approach to arguing is a major problem. You are a hothead if yelling comes first. I just gotta say that first.
She came to you and told you something incredibly personal that she likely finds super embarrassing. It's a major contributing factor to her lack of initiation. You communicated with her, she communicated back, and now you're pissy. Not reassuring. Pissy. I think you acted like an ass. And the whole “if she lied about this what else will she lie about”? Feels like major overreaction to me.
Ah, so he straight up lied about what a pedo predator he is. Are you really still making excuses to make it work with him?
Yeah it’s all good today… i did leave right out of high school.. I guess just way it was for big families.. my mom had to work outside the home so we had to step in.. I just never understood why boys didn’t have to lift a finger…
Low standards. But I’ve also seen a lot of posts about this same issue by women but man this is a dealbreaker. I know one posted commented on her bf leaving skid marks on the sheets because he slept naked… and there have been others complaining they smelled like ass and didn’t like to give head because of the smell. Before Reddit I didn’t know I had to be so thankful that my husband not only wipes his ass but washes it too. I thought that was standard basic hygiene
Ugh. All of the things he mentioned are ways he thinks YOU should change. You don't have to change who you are for anyone. He's making you feel bad about yourself. Throw him out.
It's nice to see a positive post from here. Almost everything in my feed from this sub is about cheating, distancing, etc.
Thank you to everyone being so nice to me and not just calling me a dumbass for staying.
sometimes they don’t really need a good reason, unfortunately. even though it’s unethical.
To me, even of they had different friend groups I would personally make sure both twins were celebrated. But have completely different friends is the only excpetions
Tell them you're busy. It is your birthday, after all.