30 thoughts on “Dean the hard live! sex chat with hottest babes with a Live HD”
OP: “I didn't talk to my kid for three years”
Literally everyone: “Well then that's abandonment”
OP: “Clearly only divorced women think you abandoned your kid when you do something as reasonable as cease contact for three years. I will absorb nothing and continue to ruin my kid's mental health by lying to him.”
I had all of this going on when I was your age. I'm 34 now. I would have people tell me I'm great and I make people happy and I just wasn't having any of that. I did alot of looking inward trying to pinpoint what my insecurities actually were and where they were coming from. It took alot of time, but I just kept on making tiny incremental changes in my lifestyle and thought process. It felt like I wasn't really having to work very hard at this helping me cuz I basically baby stepped my way through all of it. I would say it took me all of the rest of my 20s to get to where I'm at now, some progress came from the changes I made and some came from the series of events that occurred over the 9 years it took to get to 30. And 30 to 34 has been very fun for me, I have been happy about no longer feeling the way you described yourself feeling. You can get there bro, the hardest part was figuring out the exact details of my insecurities. But I got faith in you, and I assure you, if other people tell you that you make other people happy, you do, even if you don't understand how yourself lol
Tell her she's only giving you ten percent. So you're going to go find someone to invest 100% of yourself into. Relationships take more work then any job you'll ever have.
I don't come here to break people down, icomenhere to point out how freaken terrible their lives are objective and by any self respecting person's standard.
It sounds like an abusive situation. But part of this is you allowing it. Tell her to stop speaking to you this way. That it's not acceptable. Tell her that she need to start doing chores. Yes, pregnant women can do chores. You need to stand up for yourself, rather than slink away, otherwise you have left the relationship already.
Ugh. Seriously? Why doesn't everyfuckinbody grow up? There's literally no need in the world for OP to propose. If his gf wants to get married, WHY DOESN'T SHE ASK HIM? For FUCK'S SAKE. IT'S TWENTY TWENTY-THREE.
FUUUUUUUUUCK!
OP, don't reward her childishness or small mindedness by proposing. Instead, have a CONVERSATION WITH HER about her passive aggressiveness, about your feelings, and ABOUT MARRIAGE AND WHAT THE BOTH OF YOU WANT. You need to have the latter conversation anyway before there's any decision for or against marriage.
He's actually super open to me, never hides anything even though it might upset me. I just thought of couple counselling to maybe make him see my side, but after reading some comments, I might seek individual therapy for my paranoid thoughts. Thank you for commenting.
For the record, it sounds like you are poly. Sucessfully poly. I think thats cool that you found what works for you and has made you happy. Not knocking polyamory.
He isn't shutting her down. It's not something for him anymore, but you can talk someone who's gay into being straight or vice versa. You are into what you're in to. Something you may be in to but haven't tried would entice you, not repulse you.
If she brought it up and he threatened to leave if she ever brought it up again, that would be shutting her down. Not consenting is fundamentally NOT shutting someone's conversation down. it's not consenting. Then there's the ultimatum, that's coersion.
Based on my understanding of polyamory, consent is king, queen, and every other royal member involved regardless of pronoun… consent is a key component. OP does not consent, and GF tries coersion…. did consent mattering change or what?
Tbh it was a drunken night and we were hanging out. She was coming on to me strongly. I don’t know if she did it on purpose to get pregnant for a mix baby. Honestly I don’t remember that night.
A 10-20% is a no. She’s trying to be kind. She does not want children. She’s 35 years old and wants a 8 year IUD so she doesn’t have to worry about becoming pregnant. She doesn’t want children. You do. You’re at a crossroads. Children are amazing. And you should be with someone who wants them. And she shouldn’t be pressured into changing her mind if she’s content childless.
This will get buried because I am 4 hours late, but you and your friend are clearly not compatible as adults….and I am being kind to phrase it that way.
I don't know what makes someone ignore a “best friend” when the shit just piles on with the family stuff, but I do know that a “friend” would not participate in ANY prank that brought up the tragedy of a parent's death.
You, your spouse, your family, and your actual friends have come through these challenges to get to the place where you are now. So STOP!!!
Why are you even giving any time to this person? Your wedding, your family life, your friendships, have nothing to do with her.
Stop giving this loser space in your brain – block her, and let her know that if she makes direct contact, you will consider a restraining order. That might seem extreme, but it will keep her well away from you and your actual loved ones.
Sometimes when someone puts you on a pedestal it has the opposite of the intended effect. Some psychological thing I don’t feel like looking up. Either way, it’s unhealthy
If he has no shame staying for this long uninvited and without contributing, then you should not feel one bit shy to speak up and tell him to pack his shit and leave!
Condoms suggest a hookup rather than long term affair. If pregnancy isn't in the picture, she would have done it to avoid STD.
Yes, you should assume she is cheating, but still do some research. Ask her whether she has lent her car to other people. If the answer is no, you should go for a confrontation, without showing your cards immediately.
You know, rather than asking her about the condom, sit her down and drop the bomb, asking her if she has cheated on you. In case of denial, emphasize (lie), that you could forgive her, but if that is the case you need to know. Only if it is still denial, you tell her why you accuse her of infidelity.
Keep in mind, while trying to get truth out of her lying is absolutely a fair game. Once, you reveal your discovery you can explain it made you think she had a one time fling, that you could consider getting over, but not if you are lied about it, and if she denies you are now starting to doubt her a whole.
Naturally, if at some point on the way, a verifiable explanation is found, you should act accordingly/ For example ,if she has lent her to someone you should focus on that before doing anything else.
Even more naturally, if she confesses a “one time fling” you should still break up. Not just because she has cheated on you and hidden it, but because it could still be a lie (that it was only one time thing).
In your scenario specifically, will opening up the relationship ruin it? Yes.
For an open relationship to work, both of you need to be in a healthy, secure place (no insecurities). Both of you need to be fully on board (enthusiastic agreement/consent). You both need to fully trust each other. Even then, it can be challenging to navigate.
And in your situation? You were hesitant saying yes. The situation is already making you anxious. You *both* have trust issues. You admit you are insecure & have abandonment issues.
If you want your relationship to survive, the answer is not to open it up, that will only ruin it.
You two need to sit down & have a deep heart to heart. For both of you, you need to honestly assess where you are both at & what your priorities are. Work out how much time & energy you have to invest in those priorities. You say you have a lot of responsibility, is there anything you can let go of to make more time for your relationship? If not… then maybe the relationship is what you need to let go of.
It has been a year, and you barely met any of his friends, his family members like parents, siblings, and you never even been to his house. He deliberately tries to avoid running into ppl he knows when he's with you. What do you think?
How you never notice these red flags are beyond me.
True. I obviously have no idea, but I think that should the OP confront the.gf/ask her exactly why did she make.that purchase and/or is he not enough for her, i would bet the gf denies it. I imagine she smile and giggle a little bit while placating OP. “No, OP you are perfect! I.just thought i would get something to spice it up”. (Sending OP into a.downward.spiral of suspicion and doubt, like he is now, but on a larger scale). That is why i think the only way he.will get the truth/clarity is.to remain silent. For now. Use.the damn thing once. If.she tries.to.make it a permanent fixture in the bedroom, well, answer.received! Then he can ask her wtf is going on. I dont know…youre right we.will have to see.how this plays.out!
OP: “I didn't talk to my kid for three years”
Literally everyone: “Well then that's abandonment”
OP: “Clearly only divorced women think you abandoned your kid when you do something as reasonable as cease contact for three years. I will absorb nothing and continue to ruin my kid's mental health by lying to him.”
I had all of this going on when I was your age. I'm 34 now. I would have people tell me I'm great and I make people happy and I just wasn't having any of that. I did alot of looking inward trying to pinpoint what my insecurities actually were and where they were coming from. It took alot of time, but I just kept on making tiny incremental changes in my lifestyle and thought process. It felt like I wasn't really having to work very hard at this helping me cuz I basically baby stepped my way through all of it. I would say it took me all of the rest of my 20s to get to where I'm at now, some progress came from the changes I made and some came from the series of events that occurred over the 9 years it took to get to 30. And 30 to 34 has been very fun for me, I have been happy about no longer feeling the way you described yourself feeling. You can get there bro, the hardest part was figuring out the exact details of my insecurities. But I got faith in you, and I assure you, if other people tell you that you make other people happy, you do, even if you don't understand how yourself lol
Tell her she's only giving you ten percent. So you're going to go find someone to invest 100% of yourself into. Relationships take more work then any job you'll ever have.
Oh man that’s wild! I’m glad to hear that worked out for you. Can I ask what you didn’t like about the engagement ring initially?
This post is too vague for any reasonable advise to be given. I suggest you provide a lot more context.
Yes. He is outright telling her, out loud, that he does not want her to feel validated by other people.
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I don't come here to break people down, icomenhere to point out how freaken terrible their lives are objective and by any self respecting person's standard.
Stop being pathetic and adult up. Dump this AH.
It sounds like an abusive situation. But part of this is you allowing it. Tell her to stop speaking to you this way. That it's not acceptable. Tell her that she need to start doing chores. Yes, pregnant women can do chores. You need to stand up for yourself, rather than slink away, otherwise you have left the relationship already.
Ugh. Seriously? Why doesn't everyfuckinbody grow up? There's literally no need in the world for OP to propose. If his gf wants to get married, WHY DOESN'T SHE ASK HIM? For FUCK'S SAKE. IT'S TWENTY TWENTY-THREE.
FUUUUUUUUUCK!
OP, don't reward her childishness or small mindedness by proposing. Instead, have a CONVERSATION WITH HER about her passive aggressiveness, about your feelings, and ABOUT MARRIAGE AND WHAT THE BOTH OF YOU WANT. You need to have the latter conversation anyway before there's any decision for or against marriage.
EVERYBODY GROW THE FUCK UP. ARGGGHHHHHH!!!!
He's actually super open to me, never hides anything even though it might upset me. I just thought of couple counselling to maybe make him see my side, but after reading some comments, I might seek individual therapy for my paranoid thoughts. Thank you for commenting.
For the record, it sounds like you are poly. Sucessfully poly. I think thats cool that you found what works for you and has made you happy. Not knocking polyamory.
He isn't shutting her down. It's not something for him anymore, but you can talk someone who's gay into being straight or vice versa. You are into what you're in to. Something you may be in to but haven't tried would entice you, not repulse you.
If she brought it up and he threatened to leave if she ever brought it up again, that would be shutting her down. Not consenting is fundamentally NOT shutting someone's conversation down. it's not consenting. Then there's the ultimatum, that's coersion.
Based on my understanding of polyamory, consent is king, queen, and every other royal member involved regardless of pronoun… consent is a key component. OP does not consent, and GF tries coersion…. did consent mattering change or what?
Seems she only thought about them because you two decided to have that unnecessary conversation.
Then you have a decision to make. But don’t let anyone risk your babies lives. It’s your job to protect them.
Tbh it was a drunken night and we were hanging out. She was coming on to me strongly. I don’t know if she did it on purpose to get pregnant for a mix baby. Honestly I don’t remember that night.
A 10-20% is a no. She’s trying to be kind. She does not want children. She’s 35 years old and wants a 8 year IUD so she doesn’t have to worry about becoming pregnant. She doesn’t want children. You do. You’re at a crossroads. Children are amazing. And you should be with someone who wants them. And she shouldn’t be pressured into changing her mind if she’s content childless.
This will get buried because I am 4 hours late, but you and your friend are clearly not compatible as adults….and I am being kind to phrase it that way.
I don't know what makes someone ignore a “best friend” when the shit just piles on with the family stuff, but I do know that a “friend” would not participate in ANY prank that brought up the tragedy of a parent's death.
You, your spouse, your family, and your actual friends have come through these challenges to get to the place where you are now. So STOP!!!
Why are you even giving any time to this person? Your wedding, your family life, your friendships, have nothing to do with her.
Stop giving this loser space in your brain – block her, and let her know that if she makes direct contact, you will consider a restraining order. That might seem extreme, but it will keep her well away from you and your actual loved ones.
Don’t be stupid. Dump him. He is using you. Go have sex with the guitarist, it will teach your ex-BF.
Sometimes when someone puts you on a pedestal it has the opposite of the intended effect. Some psychological thing I don’t feel like looking up. Either way, it’s unhealthy
not planning on it for years lol
If he has no shame staying for this long uninvited and without contributing, then you should not feel one bit shy to speak up and tell him to pack his shit and leave!
ask stupid questions, get stupid answers
never ask any question that you dont want to hear the answer to
also
Am I a hypocrite for hanging up on her over this?
yes you are.
once you cheat, you should move on.
TURN YOUR KEY MOIRA
Condoms suggest a hookup rather than long term affair. If pregnancy isn't in the picture, she would have done it to avoid STD.
Yes, you should assume she is cheating, but still do some research. Ask her whether she has lent her car to other people. If the answer is no, you should go for a confrontation, without showing your cards immediately.
You know, rather than asking her about the condom, sit her down and drop the bomb, asking her if she has cheated on you. In case of denial, emphasize (lie), that you could forgive her, but if that is the case you need to know. Only if it is still denial, you tell her why you accuse her of infidelity.
Keep in mind, while trying to get truth out of her lying is absolutely a fair game. Once, you reveal your discovery you can explain it made you think she had a one time fling, that you could consider getting over, but not if you are lied about it, and if she denies you are now starting to doubt her a whole.
Naturally, if at some point on the way, a verifiable explanation is found, you should act accordingly/ For example ,if she has lent her to someone you should focus on that before doing anything else.
Even more naturally, if she confesses a “one time fling” you should still break up. Not just because she has cheated on you and hidden it, but because it could still be a lie (that it was only one time thing).
The boyfriend was wrong for what he did but OP stayed with him under certain conditions which he accepted and is abiding by
Sure his wording might not have been the best but she’s being unreasonable here
Looks like you don't really need advice. Call a lawyer, today.
In your scenario specifically, will opening up the relationship ruin it? Yes.
For an open relationship to work, both of you need to be in a healthy, secure place (no insecurities). Both of you need to be fully on board (enthusiastic agreement/consent). You both need to fully trust each other. Even then, it can be challenging to navigate.
And in your situation? You were hesitant saying yes. The situation is already making you anxious. You *both* have trust issues. You admit you are insecure & have abandonment issues.
If you want your relationship to survive, the answer is not to open it up, that will only ruin it.
You two need to sit down & have a deep heart to heart. For both of you, you need to honestly assess where you are both at & what your priorities are. Work out how much time & energy you have to invest in those priorities. You say you have a lot of responsibility, is there anything you can let go of to make more time for your relationship? If not… then maybe the relationship is what you need to let go of.
It has been a year, and you barely met any of his friends, his family members like parents, siblings, and you never even been to his house. He deliberately tries to avoid running into ppl he knows when he's with you. What do you think?
How you never notice these red flags are beyond me.
True. I obviously have no idea, but I think that should the OP confront the.gf/ask her exactly why did she make.that purchase and/or is he not enough for her, i would bet the gf denies it. I imagine she smile and giggle a little bit while placating OP. “No, OP you are perfect! I.just thought i would get something to spice it up”. (Sending OP into a.downward.spiral of suspicion and doubt, like he is now, but on a larger scale). That is why i think the only way he.will get the truth/clarity is.to remain silent. For now. Use.the damn thing once. If.she tries.to.make it a permanent fixture in the bedroom, well, answer.received! Then he can ask her wtf is going on. I dont know…youre right we.will have to see.how this plays.out!
Sounds like you both work and have decent incomes. Have you considered hiring help? A nanny or housekeeper?