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DonDXGemma, 23 y.o.
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I tried to talk about it with him but he only response was that's “not his thing”. Like I would have a really good outfit and make up on etc, generally just a day where I feel really good and I have to ask if I look good, he doesn't says it on his own. He also only recently started making me compliments because I complained about it..
It honestly sounds like a difference in libido. I'm sure you do feel bad because you didn't know you were upsetting him, but the statements were pretty innocuous.
You guys sound nuts right ?
You can break up with someone without them agreeing to it.
Nearly all breakups are one person who wants to and one who doesn't, that's simply their nature.
Well, you can either prove him right by staying with him, or prove him wrong by kicking him to the curb.
If it helps, as a half Arabic/half American woman you probably physically resemble the Italian women on the show more than Portia, no?
Girl your update… You are delusional
I said it to someone else a few min. ago. I'm on my phone so much, even if I'm busy at work, I make time to whoever I talk to even if it's rising from platonic to romantic love.
“The father of my child” maybe he thinks that the kid isnt his kid
Get a small storage for your stuff…at this point they are just thieving…they have no respect for you or belongings…I don't know what mental illness they have…to me they are just low lives
Let him do the test (out of his own pocket) and leave him. He cheated on you and now he’s questioning your commitment to him? Trash.
I am 70 and my first husband started exactly like this. Punched a wall, then the second time, punched a wall close to my head. The third time, he hit me. Each time, he sobbed and cried and said he would never do it again, but he did. Abuse like this doesn’t get better. It will get worse, and statistically he could kill you.
Make no mistake, this IS abuse. He will NOT kill himself. He is saying this to get you to stay and if you do, you are telling him that this abuse is OK.
You are incompatible. Are you even planning to on-line together in the future? How do you imagine future with her being the way she is?
Yes, you should tell her to cancel her trip to you. Be honest and explain you need more affection than she can give you, and you are just not compatible.
Btw you really should seek partner that lives in the same city as you.
Which is why you don’t go on a break. You say you need a few days of space to come to terms with your emotions etc. you don’t say we go on a break. A break means you are not in a relationship anymore. Unless both parties agreed to a different view.
You're a grown up, do as you please.
The only thing I'd say re the age gap is understand what you each want out of the relationship.
If he's 42 and single, he could either be committed to staying single, or could now be ready to settle down, and either could be fine with you, provided you KNOW the score.
If it's the case that he wants permanency and you don't, you might want to be cautious, because he's getting to an age where he might be possessive and jealous if you aren't ready to settle down.
If he's a confirmed single, understand he's unlikely to change, and you need to not get your hopes up that he will.
If you are both in the same page- enjoy!!
I’m sorry that you’re so stressed out instead of being able to enjoy the excitement of pregnancy.
It sounds like your family just sucks, and I think you have to accept that and control the things that you actually can control.
It does not sound like you’re going to have the bonding experience with your mom that you hoped for, and instead, you were attempts at bonding will just be used to hurt you. That is so unfair and I’m very sorry, but I think you should take that knowledge and use it to protect yourself.
You know that your sister is going to take over conversations, so don’t have conversations that matter to you when she’s around. Don’t spend time with your parents when she’s there. You know your family is going to disappoint you, so don’t ask them for things and keep your expectations really low. You know that they will weaponize information and use it against you so put them all on an information diet. They don’t need to know anything about your pregnancy or how you’re prepping for the baby going forward.
Lean on your friends and your partner’s family for support and to celebrate your pregnancy. You’re going to be a mom soon, which means that you are making your own family, and while it sucks that your family of origin is a big disappointment, look at this as a beautiful opportunity to create something new instead of letting them drag you down.
What does she say? Is she even interested in you more than a coworker/friend?
Thank you for saying that. Everything else is good. His intentions for continuing to see her were purely platonic, while I had to point out to him that she very clearly (to me, not him) still has feelings for him.
The best part of a relationship is learning new things about yourself
The only important things to keep an eye on are red flags and your boundaries.
Something I’d reply with ‘Stop talking about my body unless it’s something nice. This is effecting my self esteem. These comments can last a very long time in my mind. I don’t appreciate this talk.’
This talk is learned behavior and it can be stopped. every time he has something negative to say I would make sure I had a good line about him in my pocket too.
This might not be the terrible thing you think it is. She clarified she wasn't breaking up with you. She explained she was stressed and just wanted her family. After all that training, it might be simply that she wants to have a low-key time with her family. That doesn't mean you're any less important. I understand that you want to be there and you are hurt by it, but here's what I'd do instead: send her a text and say hey, I really want us to celebrate your graduation together, so please let me know when works best for you and I'll plan something. Try not to stress out too much!
Tell her if she plans on being with you long term she needs to get over this immature mindset or miss out on visiting these wonderful places altogether.