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But relationships are about compromise and caring about what both partners want and need, not just one partner
Weird comment when we’re talking about sexual boundaries.
Doubt you would be out here saying “it’s about compromise” if it was OP asking for anal.
Are we absolutely certain that OP had a baby with this woman? Or is he merely living in the same house as this woman and her baby?
What makes you think “Deal with it” is acceptable behavior and better than throwing towels in someone's face? Why should she be “dealing with” you not being able to meet a very low mundane ask? What other shortcomings and decisions of yours she supposed to just deal with?
Yeah throwing towels is not okay but tbh your phrase is as big of a red flag.
it’s still fresh. it happened last night. he claimed that it was too much drama and he was guilting me for everything. he continued to make me feel like shit but he said “i’m not trying to guilt you. reminder i’m not trying to bring you down”
That’s so good to hear… I know type doesn’t mean love or no love. It’s great to hear other people express their lives.
I think the problem for me is that if I wasn’t her type from the beginning it would be so much easier!! I think it’s rough for me because she changed her type after her most recent fling during a break up we had and NOW I’m not her type anymore. Meanwhile HE is her #1 type.
Can you provide more information as to what a sociopath is like?
To me it sounds like he just wanted to sound cool. When I was first dating my husband, I too wanted to seem cool, so I was telling people that our relationship wasn't serious and blahblahblah.
If he wanted to separate the friendship from his religious beliefs, he would have congratulated you and attended your wedding
Sounds like the one you're not close to is the one who's interested in you and the one you like is playing Cupid.
People have been all sorts of idiots
Reach out to someone you trust nearby. Get away from him immediately. If you are in the phoenix ax area, I will come get you. If not available, get ahold of a domestic violence center in your area.
What? ?
Yeah the little I got here, sounds like OCD.
A roll a day and she doesn’t even work from home? Girls may use more but not by much. The combination of wastefulness and expecting you to deal with her clogs as she runs out the door would be a dealbreaker.
As others have recommended, get a bidet. My husband and I have one and we use one roll a week. Even if you don’t stay together, consider it a gift to the environment and your wallet.
Thanks, I think that’s how I’ll proceed. Recording her would come back to bite me, but walking out of the conversation when it’s unhealthy seems effective. Cheers.
Thanks, I think that’s how I’ll proceed. Recording her would come back to bite me, but walking out of the conversation when it’s unhealthy seems effective. Cheers.
After 5 years, it took this relatively reasonable and innocent extra 30 minutes for dropping someone off at home, for her to utter the words “break-up”.
The problem is not anything that you did or said. The problem is her interpretations of what you did or said, which means it can come up again at any point.
So either she really does distrust you this much, or she was looking for a reason to break up and this was a way to do it and make it look like your fault, to the people that she tells her story to.
So you just have to weigh these things in mind in case you're thinking of getting back together with her.
They are trying to find a way to blame him, make it his fault for her mental health problems. He should have done this, said this, etc. The fact is she could have called, she could have texted, and it's not on him to manage her and her emotions, she's a grown ass adult, bare minimum is managing her own problems.
No, he’s been on one before for 1-2 days several months ago, this was the same length in a different city than that one. But he told me last night he would be gone again for a week this time in the same city in about a month.
I get it and agree. Sometimes these days I feel a bit like 'old man yelling at clouds'. Ironically when I was dating I remember my parents being perplexed – why would I immediately 'go steady' with one girl instead of dating multiple girls until I found the right one to go steady with?
A lot of times this stories are missing a lot of important components. But in your case the best that you could do is to split the parking expenses. I don’t know how you guys do it splitting everything like you are supposed to be one.
Good luck
No it's never worth staying with cheaters. You're young man don't waste time being tied down to her
Simply put the reason why you are bothered, why you are confused and why do you even care is solely down to the fact that you never properly separated from each other, you didn’t actually break up with each other properly.
Because you have children together it makes it all the more difficult because you can’t totally separate and break up with each other in a clean way that a couple without kids are able to.
Because you have kids you are always going to have some sort of contact with each other and a connection for life. The fact that when you did break up and he came to see the kids he stayed over at yours and inevitably you both had sex with each other and basically you went from being together in a relationship to breaking up and being together with each other but just living in different places and you were only broken up in name only.
That’s why you feel like this and it wasn’t just sex between you both because you never had a clean break from each other.
Regardless of what happens now with his new girlfriend, whether it lasts or not or whether he does resume coming back to seeing his kids or not you need to put some significant boundaries in place to protect yourself in the future from this situation happening again and you feeling like this. I would suggest the following few boundaries;
1) He never ever stays over at your place no matter what. It doesn’t matter if he has missed the last train or bus home, it doesn’t matter if his car won’t start, it doesn’t matter whatever other possible reason, He never ever stays over at yours.
2) Any communication that you have with him and he has with you is only to be about the kids and nothing else. Not even a “I HOPE THAT YOU ARE OKAY, I just wanted to let you know that your son is going to his nans this weekend so you can have him the following weekend” so no chit chat and no messages about your kids with a kiss or two at the end.
3) When it’s his turn to have the kids then you either drop them off at your parents house or his parents house for him to collect them and he drops them off back there for you to collect them.
You need to put these boundaries in place to break the cycle and connection between you both so you truly separate from each other
She has to live with herself though.
You can’t sue for defamation if what you stated was true. If you were telling the truth you have nothing to worry about.
Hey man, you're getting a lot of hate and harsh truths here. I'm not convinced you did anything wrong, sounds like you were really taken advantage of and tried to be a stand-up guy after this.
Why not reach out to your ex, don't go into too much detail at first. Just say you miss her and see if she'll talk to you. Hopefully she will.
No matter what, you need to move on from your fiance. This is a mess and I think she did it on purpose
Your managing ONE website? So youre sitting around doing nothing for most of the day?
Depends how much you want a baby and this way there’s no IVF hurdles to overcome.
It is a secret she kept hidden. You seem to think secrets are some dark and deep thing but they aren’t always, they are simply things we don’t tell other people. She didn’t tell him, now he knows and it doesn’t sit well with him. That’s all.
I don’t think he is being judgemental. Reacting to news and having feelings about it isn’t judging her, it’s simply that has this new information and he has strong feelings about it.
1.). Don’t ever stay just because someone says they’ll harm themselves. That’s manipulation and also not your responsibility.
2.) Talk with her and have her cut up her credit card in front of you.
3.) after doing this (if you choose to stay) periodically check her credit report to make sure she isn’t opening more.
4.) Is there a particular reason why she isn’t working? SHE has debt she’s needs to pay off.
It sounds as if you have already checked out of this relationship, even if she were to fix all of the problems you listed. So, if it’s only guilt keeping you there start making plans for your exit. This is harsh but it’s time for her to start adulting. She’ll eventually be okay.
Kewl story troll.
Are you both in relationships? Or are you both single? If so just tell him your feelings.
Lack of personal hygiene is, to me, a complete 100% dealbreaker. I can live with differing standards of housecleaning (although after 43 years of marriage we long ago sorted out who was more likely to do what and it’s worked out well, my hubs is a gem), but personal grossness, absolutely not. And it will likely get worse once he no longer has to worry you’ll leave, since you married him as is, right?
He raped you. Go to the pharmacy and get plan B. Hopefully you are wrong that you ovulated today.
Then call the police. Block him on everything.
Why are you together? That's disgusting ? I'd have dumped her 9 years ago
Lol. That's what a throwaway account is for. This seems like a creepy way of getting someone you may want to date to DM you. Women beware.
But they both already booked tickets so would lose money and I’d feel bad. I’d also like to see them both as it be awhile before I come back to Europe and I wouldn’t be able to pick between them
You didn’t waste 8 years, you got out before you wasted any more of your time. I’m sorry this guy lied to you, but if it’s any consolation this relationship he has probably isn’t healthy nor will it probably last long. I hope you have enough strength to push him away when he comes crawling back. You are better than this
Yeah, cancel the trip and do not meet him in person for any reason. If you can’t find his license under his legal name in his state, he doesn’t have one.
They are available for the public to verify credentials for a reason. He also should be on other publicly available sites, like the hospital website, healthy grades, find a Doc, etc… (I check the licenses of any professional I use. You want to find out if your Dentist has been sued five times).
A ‘Doctor’ with zero live presence or license is a red flag. As are the expensive gifts and him living out of state. You have no idea who this guy really is. But he isn’t being honest and is coming on really strong. He may become dangerous if you confront him.
I wasn’t fine with it and I discussed the previous 2 with my sis (mother of this bride) months ago and she told me it was ‘protocol’ and to get over it.
Just leave, dear god.
Who mops every day? Hugs and kisses aren't duties, either.