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why dont you leave?? istg people on reddit are so stupid
Tell him ok fine if he gets an outside partner so do you and go find you one. When he objects tell him this is the way it is and he can’t do anything about it. Even if you don’t want to step out you can pretend. Stay out at night, hide your phone, make him suspect you are seeing someone. Make him sweat.
Kind of a red flag yeah but might not be aggressive behaviour or troubles with anger issues.
I'm w and I used to punch my wall as a kind of self-harming behaviour because it helped me cope when I got severely depressed or started to disassociate. It helped me to snap back to reality and feel myself.
Obviously NOT good behaviour in any way…but I'm just saying maybe find out WHY he is acting that way.
Ok… I have done this a few times but it never hurts to spell it out one more time.
You can't get into a relationship without getting a bunch of it on you. It like separating two boards that have been glued together. A little bit of one board always goes with the other. So you will be walking around with some of the other person stuck to you for a while. It takes about 3 monthe to six months to get past this in any meaningful way. (I have a standard rule for clients that thay make NO Life-Changing decisions for the first year out of a serious relationship and that year needs to be spent sorting out baggage.)
Moving back from that there are things you can do to keep on track and not backslide:
a.) No Contact with the old flame. Period. Full stop. No emails, texts, phonecalls, messages in a bottle, smoke signals etc etc . Nothing Zip. Zero. Nada.
b.) Memoribilia goes in a box. Outta sight; outta mind. Souvenirs, gifts, used condoms, etc etc all get put away. Preferably someplace not easily accessed impulsively (see: Guideline A.)
c.) Avoid places you have gone before AND places where it is likely that you former flame would frequent. You will probably have to let go the friends as well as you don't need any offers to “help patch things up” or “unsolicited updates” on who and what said former flame is doing.
d.) No emotion-driven entertainment, including chick-flicks, Hallmark Hall of Fame, “can't-live-without-you-themed” music and Romance Novels.
e.) Get da Fuck outta yer House. Do NOT ISOLATE. Identify two new activities that you had not gotten around to because heaven and earth moved around your Ex. The more physical these activities are the better.
f.) Get da Fuck outta yer House. Reconnect with those folks who dropped off your radar because you had assumed that the love of your life was going to be the be-all and end-all of Life as we know it.
g.) Get da Fuck outta yer House. Don't do anything in yer house or alone that you can't do someplace where there are people. At the very least you should be out for brisk walks around the block once a day. Set yourself a goal of saying something to at least two NEW people each day.
Get to work. You got yourself into this pickle. Time to get yourself out.
Any questions?
This that Maury shit
Talk to a therapist before you act out on it. Try to figure out why.
Nah he doesn’t deserve a explanation. Just block him and his friends and move on. What a loser, hopefully he will go to jail again
Hell yes you did. Surprised you waited that long. That relationship was doomed.
I was 23 when I went on my first ever successful date with my boyfriend and I’m 27 now and we are still together. Sometimes it works out. I recommend just being patient, if you really care about him it shouldn’t matter. My boyfriend wasn’t a virgin, but I was. It didn’t bother him at all, and we are still together almost 4 years later.
So what???
Unless your girlfriend suddenly grows a Penis I think you're fine.
Thank you, good luck to you!
Yes, but due to their size, and fan sizes they move air around faster/more completely compared to traditional ovens. There is a performs e difference, they are essentially two different tools when you compare them. There is a bunch of math and modeling on it, kinda interesting.
You and your husband need to address this with your mil before your daughter/other kids hear or pick up on it.
That could be anything racy, nudes, lingerie, anything
With prior approval, no cheating.
Hmmm. Couples can literally end up talking about anything daily. It can go from how the day went for each of you to venting about coworkers or traffic or weather then to movies or food or going off on a random tangent or whatnot.
If you find yourself feeling awkward in a moment of not having a new topic, perhaps you can say a cheesy joke or ponder a weird thought out loud to help get the conversation going again. Or even just acknowledge the elephant in the room. “Oh man, our conversation stalled. Now what?” And laugh. Sometimes that could help make it seem less awkward.
I think if you feel like you need to talk about something serious, you can always ask your partner something like: “hey, this is kind of bothering me and I’d really like to talk to you about it. Is now a good time or should we wait until later or tomorrow?” And then let them know you appreciate them listening to you and that you’re always there if they’d like to talk/bounce something off you too. Hopefully over time, you’ll both get more comfortable doing that.
And just make sure you practice good listening skills. If she feels like you’re only half tuned in or something, she may not turn to you for problems or support in the future. And if you don’t understand what she’s saying, you can kindly explain you’re not fully understanding. Then ask if she can explain it in a different way or repeat it again so you can take it all in a second time. But just be kind about it. And then you can always try to repeat it back to her to make sure you’re good.
You got this!
You need to run as far as you can from anyone who has this kind of relationship with their mother.
I’ve been with my boyfriend for 4 years and he found out 2 years into our relationship that he had a child. He got his ex pregnant the week they broke up and his daughter was born a month before we started dating. The ex only let him know because his daughter started asking about her dad.
When I found out I was super upset. Not with my boyfriend or the child of course, but with his ex for hiding it from him for so long. My boyfriend is amazing and he would have 100% stepped up to be a good dad and might have even tried to make their relationship work if his ex was willing. It was super confusing and hurtful time because I love him so much and it almost felt like he cheated on me even though he didn’t. Knowing that he had a child with another woman really broke my heart. His ex lives 2 hours from his hometown which was 10 hours away from where he and I used to live. My boyfriend was obviously going to prioritize his daughter so he moved and I made the very hot decision to leave my hometown and family behind to live! with him. Some advice I can give after having gone through this for almost 2 years now is:
It’s going to be really confusing for the child at first. They’ll probably be shy and take a while to open up. Try to figure out their favorite foods and activities to do when they come over.
Draw up an official custody agreement. Mediation is great too. My boyfriend originally thought that he and his ex could work out custody themselves even though I advised him to get it legally drawn up and after the first few months his ex started to become very uncooperative and unreliable so my boyfriend was forced to take her to court for custody.
I think it’s nice you want to meet with the ex to talk to her but I honestly think you should leave all communication to your husband and his ex. Speaking from experience, people who choose to not let their child’s parent into their life for many years for no good reason are usually difficult people to work with. Save yourself the stress.
Try your best to make sure his child is having an equal experience to both of your children. If you guys want family photos make sure you include his child/your step child. If you take any special trips for the kids to Disney make sure to bring his child too. I know this sounds obvious but you’d be surprised by some people.
Make sure you communicate with your fiancée privately if you’re feeling uncomfortable or stressed about a situation.
It’s been a rough 2 years but I love my future stepdaughter so much and I love when she comes over. I see a lot of my boyfriends qualities in her which is sweet. Good luck!
OP is a troll. Don’t give them anymore attention. Read through their comments. I’m glad they are being downvoted but hope no one else wastes their time entertaining this bozo.
I think she noticed bro but I’m extremely pessimistic lol
Trust your gut. Just tell her you've enjoyed getting to know her a little but you're seeing someone else now so you have to stop. (a white lie) then ghost her.
If your family would cut your off, thinking that you are a liar, then it would still not be “because of you”, it would be “because of your aunt”. You have no fault in this.
Also I would hope that your mother keeps your wellbeing in mind and that, if you don't want the rest of your family to know, she will keep it to herself.
If you get a good therapist, you will be able to get over this. You will never forget it, but you will be able to move on. And yes, it sucks. You don't deserve this. You didn't do anything wrong. That's why it's so important to not let your abuser win and get help via therapy – and/or cut people siding with your aunt out of your life.
As someone who also had trauma therapy (was caught in a burning building, wasn't great), lemme tell you that there are many different forms of therapy and not everyone is a good fit with every form of therapy. It might require a bit of searching to find a therapist specializing in a form of therapy that helps. And the therapy itself is also rough – and, again, you don't deserve this. But every day you wait and don't get help is a day of your life wasted – a day your predator aunt stole from you. Don't let her steal your life.
In the USA if you buy a house, no matter what your marital status, you are entitled to fair proceedings. The only reason you wouldn't be is personal choice. As long as your name is on the deed you have rights. No matter what the jurisdiction.
My ex did say things to him that were highly inappropriate and he behaved angrily and aggressively when we visited and my brother's new bf was there. He's young but he's old enough to understand and deserved an explanation. I would have much preferred to keep my ex's thoughts about him completely separate but it wasn't an option. My brother already has insecurities due to behavior from other adults in his life and how my ex has treated him has fed into that.
Yeah I’m sure plenty of gay men love it
How long as it been?
Is your GFs sister allergic to you? Why can't you go over and all hang out as planned?
It's disrespectful to cancel plans last minute to extend plans with someone else.
Honestly either call to deal with it or cancel all together and don't go Sunday at all. Let her miss you, then she'll be more willing to spend time.
That and/or he’s been lying to his real, actual girlfriend, who is an entirely different person from OP.
You are right.
if i was cuddling with girls, my bf would def be uncomfortable too (rightfully so).
if my bf was cuddling with other guys i would be uncomfortable as well.
cuddling with your friends like that is weird. i’ve had my girl friends lay their heads on my shoulder or rest their bodies on me, but not spoon and cuddle like that. that’s fucking weird.
This is NOT NORMAL.
If he had the ability to be as silly as me, maybe! But he doesn't even seem to get 'joking around'… I know this was a sarcastic question, but man I wish we could do fun silly stuff like that. He'd just find it awkward.
I do find it exhausting. I'm just numb to the things he says because there doesn't seem to be any rational thought behind it.
Leave him. Don't let anyone bully you into a sexual relationship you don't want. This is a him thing it's not you at all. The fact that he's threatening you means he knows full well is not something you want. Even if you cave you won't be happy, and he knows he can keep pushing, and pretty soon, he will be doing whatever he wants because you'll say yes, so it will never be called cheating.
I love how men never get support on this sub.
I also think it’s important to mention that he probably didn’t want to be a bad host or birthday boy. He might’ve felt obligated to entertain the people his girlfriend didn’t know, since she was technically hosting this. When you’re comfortable with someone, you might not feel the need to keep them entertained cause you know they’re good on their own
Ok, you look for another job and stay in this one in the meantime (unless it turns super toxic.) I hate the cliche but “it's easier to get a job if you already have one”.
Nate deserved it, he's lying to his GF about the circumstances and who gives a fuck what the rest think. Your privacy was violated and anyone not in that camp isn't worth your time.