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No, this isn't how newly weds behave or how they should. There are some things you should have talked about (and every couple that thinks about getting married) and one of those is managing the money, expectations about lifestyle, kids etc. You didn't, but better late than ever.
You might not go to bed angry, but there are a lot of emotions that go deeper than that for both of you. Sit down with her and communicate all that with her (or maybe try counseling?), without the intention of hurting her or judging her or point a finger to her. Just tell her “Hey, I don't feel we are happy together, but I want to work through that” and lay down the issues you want to discuss. The money, the intimacy, your weight and how she makes fun of you, the chores, everything. If she is willing to listen and actively work on all that for the sake of your relationship, then great! If not, then you will have to put a limit within you on how long you will be able to be in a relationship that physically and emotionally draining.
You need to teach your son that society is not going to change for him and to stop being a wuss. You are enabling his stupid behaviour. If he wants to be trans let him be trans but stop trying to convince the world that they need to change and cater to him. Trans movement is idiotic
Like can’t breath and move for a good 30 seconds pain. I really don’t know. I had fully believe accident but after reading and the comments here as well, I feel like the second time was not.
If you and she can describe what work you've each put in to improving yourself as an individual, to ensuring you can provide a more stable life for your son and what your takeaways are for how to ensure you are falling into the same relationship dynamics that you had 8 months ago? Sure, maybe take it very slow and give it a shot. Until then, nope.
No, cancel any wedding plans you may have. Tell him, if he wants to be with he needs to get over his ex. This means you will intentionally wear things that he asked you not to, and he will do all the things he wasn't doing, because of his.
Essentially tell him to choose, “respect” for his ex or respect for you. Tell him this is a permanent choice he can either discard her or you will have to break up.
Even if he agrees keep it up for some time to see if it lasts. Optimally at least 2 years, since he may put effort temporarily to lure you into marriage, and then revert to his current state.
I have tried to have discussions with him about having kids but he gets annoyed and shuts down the conversation before it advances too far, and I kinda thought he would get annoyed because I was jumping the gun by asking about kids before he even proposed.
In the few short conversations that we had about having kids he told me that he is concerned about my catholic latino family and that the cultural difference would be “too much of a nightmare situation” to raise kids between two different families/cultures.
I agree it’s been impossible for me to not text him multiple times because 1.5 years is a long time to just ghost someone over something this small. But 3 days is irregular for him which is why I think he may be done. I edited the fight into the post too I forgot to mention it
Right! He's also u/AlbertSea894…
are you dumb? no. You don't have to be dumb. Smart people make that choice too….it is the wrong choice to take back someone who went out of their way to cheat on you and then blame you. Guess what is going to happen next time when a problem arrises? I will guess for you. She will cheat on you again and cover it up/lie..what do you do then? you will still love her..I guess you take her back again then and the time after that and the time after that and the time after that….anyways, At the very least someone has to take responsibility for their actions and telling you that “I cheated cuz you were emotionally unavailable” is not taking responsibility. They make a decision to not break it off and pursue their needs, despite what that will do to their partner. It is a conscious decision. One willful decision after another to hurt you…think on that for a bit before you ever take someone back (which by the way isnt worth it).