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OP your relationship with your mother is toxic. Excepting this party issue how is your other interactions? Does she criticize you over other things you do? Sounds like she has a chip on her shoulder and she is targeting you. Evaluate everything and if you find your mother being harsh or even constantly negative I would disconnect and go NC. My parents treated me horribly through my teenage years and we had a huge violent fight one day after high school graduation. I vanished and went NC for over five years. I would do it again.
What an awful situation you’re in! “You don’t make me feel like a man” is a red flag to me. Why is it your responsibility to make him feel like a man. That’s totally his responsibility to feel what he feels. If he flips out because you say he takes too long — that’s also on him. At the same time you married a guy and had his kid knowing you were not all that sexually compatible. There are lots of ways to have sex. He doesn’t have to come every time. And neither do you. I wonder if there’s another issue in the relationship that makes him unattractive to you. If there is, it sounds like he can’t hear it. You can’t control what he can or can’t tolerate hearing. If you’re asking for permission to leave him, go for it. Single parenthood is not for everyone. But neither is living with someone whom you feel inattracted To.
That’s how my friend busted her husband – pulled the phone records.
Yep. Unless it's a surprise for mom, you don't tell kids to keep things a secret without it being incredibly suspicious.
She isn’t your gf no more.
To me it would be about consistency. Be in her corner, show her your love and appreciation, be there when she needs reassurance, but don't suck up to her. Don't go over the top trying to make her feel better, otherwise that could feel like pressure. Just be there and pay attention.
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Does your family show affection and love or is this a new thing for you?
Are you secretly hating your boyfriend and wish you could break up with him but his family would be sad?
Break up if you don’t want him to be your boyfriend. Make them sad don’t spend the rest of your life with someone out of obligation or guilt
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Wow, he got really lucky got a naked young girlfriend that takes care of all of us animals that he can have sex with and she cleans too. Do you get my point
But for now call the cops. They will give a temporary restraining order that will last a few days. If your husband contacts you, call the cops to say he’s violating the order and he will list likely be arrested which will give you more time and more evidence for a permanent restraining order (just fyi permanent means a few months to years- I got one for a few years against my sons father and full custody)
You need to get a lawyer. And I hate to be the one to say this, but you might have an issue with going to the police because hit him back. I don't know your area, I really don't, and only someone in your area will know your local police and their beliefs. You could call a domestic abuse shelter if you can't afford a lawyer – sometimes they have people on staff who can advise you on how to go through the police and legal systems. Or a domestic abuse hotline local to your area.
But he isn't going to stop. This is the second time, he is blaming you for “making” him hit your with words. His mother supports him, and his mother is the only voice he cares about besides his.
You are worth so much more than this. You already now that this isn't a situation you can stay in. He is never going to chose to be better for you.
Something is off. Why TF is she taking sexy selfies but not sharing them with you?
100% this OP. Listen to your mother.
Right? There's a reason people are skeptical and critical of age gaps this big…
Naked to get into his head here. It's possible that given how little regard you were showing for his physical comfort, he was just acting to ensure you weren't going to hurt him again.
It's possible that given how little regard you were showing for his emotional comfort, he pushed you out of anger. Which, yes, is extremely concerning.
Either way, you need to figure out what made you antagonize him after you hurt his leg. It's not a healthy dynamic. It reads to me (and probably to him) like you're angry about something and letting it come out like this.
These engraveable words should be required at the planning stages of every single one of these events.
She's your sil's best friend, she's part of their family not just a roommate. It was ONE night 12 years ago and you can't get past that? This is absolutely a you problem. It's not disrespectful, it's not wrong, and it's not that big of a deal honestly. Bringing up her looks is mean and unnecessary. It sounds like you need therapy if this is affecting you this much.
The assholery of some people is just so frustrating. Glad you dumped that piece of sh*t
This guy's got it all figured out
yeah go ahead and divorce her. get your half of that house too my guy, it doesn't matter that you're not on the title.
Want to know why they are afraid of virgins? They don't want to/know how to take the time and care your first time deserves. They are bad lovers and know it. That guy is a giant asshole and you deserve better.
I will urge you to be more open with your next guy. There are lots of great guys out there. I promise they exist. Give them a chance to really know you. You'll be great!
So he's just helping them out, but not really financially. That's an important part of your post that you left out to make it seem worse
I asked what about all the unsent messages? He said those were accidental texts sent when his phone unlocked while it was in his pocket.
Yeah, that sounds like bullshit to me.
He either said something inappropriate, or he came onto her.
Are you friendly with this mom? If you are, I'd just ask her outright while also making sure she knows you're just asking and not accusing her of anything. The only person who seems to be shifty is your husband.
i had actually placed the boundary before. to please give me space until he knew where he wanted to stand in my life and he had broken it out of a want to talk to me for the reasons i stated above he felt it was unfair
Apparently it was promised last year before we met and they couldn't do it at that time.
bets on him hoping she gets the std and then feels too diseased to leave him and find someone better.
Just cycle in the new ones, put the old ones in storage. Pretend you love them. Cmon man.