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Break up and tell him to date a guy then since he hates women that much.
Leave. Inform the police, get a lawyer, he drugged a 3yo, he shouldn't be allowed any custody
Have you straight out told her it's a turn off? Or maybe next time stop being intimate when she does this?
This made me laugh
He’s just telling it as he sees it, which is a good way to offend people. One needs to know when not to say what pops into their head.
Sticky date pudding?
Same, girl. Which is so sad bc who doesn’t love making out? Making out > beard any day
Yes he does he’s just confused
You don't want to talk about his addiction but those two things can't be separated – you are living with an alcoholic. Even if it's not impacting you now it will. Being strict and honest is necessary.
There is no way it would remain anonymous even if OP told his wife nothing. She knows damned well who her husband wants and who will take him away from her.
OMG ????????????????????????????????????????
Just give him a 3 month proposal ultimatum and move on.
P.s. Do you have reliable evidence that the second address was the friend’s actual home? Or was that yet another guy with (ahem) a couch?
Give me ten minutes and access to the internet and I can show you screenshots of Winston Churchill congratulating me on my successful test flight to Alpha Centauri.
Ooh, op, do this!!
So you were there to witness him not doing coke? Is that your evidence? And even if you’re wrong, he still treated you like shit. Just because he’s angry doesn’t justify his behavior. I would reevaluate the relationship.
Thank you for this. Is there anywhere in writing I could show them that having kids without electricity and water could lose custody? That would help.
I was gonna say, you could argue that in Gatsby, the woman's husband (was her name Daisy? It's been years.), Tom, was a total monster.
It’s either something that helps her swallow being “kept”, or more worrying, she doesn’t really understand money.
The former is worth supporting. The latter can be anything from a nuisance to completely derailing. My ex never understood financials, blamed me for any financial issues even though she chose to take lowering paying jobs than she could have, and is now coming from a completely entitled place in divorce. She always seemed savvy and someone that wanted a fair situation.
I disagree that this isn’t a bill worth dying on. I think it’s worth a frank conversation to figure out what’s going on. The answer may be you continue on to help with her insecurity. It may also be a rabbit hole of trouble.
Then again she may not. She's got a career and wants to advance into hat and has many opportunities in the new city. She's 25 and you were 18. Big difference.
talk to him, tell him straight all your feelings & insecurities & your boundaries beforehand as if you wanna marry him he needs to know, especially on his jokes, what is acceptable & what its not.
“When you are married here's the order of importance of people in your life: Yourself, Your Child, Your Spouse, Everyone Else On The Planet” – this is important to know & practice
There's other ways you can have sex you know. Why not try toys and things like that or BDSM or role play or whatever you're into.
So again, can you articulate the reasoning behind coming to the conclusion that “it's not the same if tis with a woman”?
Open relationship is not a solution, just defers the end a bit.
Get counseling, then divorce.
Sir, I honestly and prudently do not think it is a wise idea to move in with ANYONE after “ALMOST two MONTHS”.
And forgive my cynicism, I truly do feel it's about sex.
Agreed that she wants you to practice with her.
The only another advice I have is if you two have a night or specific time planned, some men find that masterbating in the morning before the event can prevent a 'quivk one two ur done' (which btw, was disrespectful of her to say. Hopefully she learns that at some point and isn't just that disrespectful, but you should watch for signs of this).
I more meant that she should know, as a baseline that the dude is shady af, and that she's not just monitoring him as some quirk… her reluctance is to not want to kneecap her own way of keeping him under a microscope. But I just had to re-read my own comment twice, and this reply twice to kinda be sure I'm making any sense translating thoughts to text because it's after 3am and I'm deliriously insomniatic (not even sure this is a word, but fuck it) right now.
I know this might be an unpopular opinion but I trust my husband more than anyone else on this planet, including my family members. If someone came to me and told me he cheated, sexually assaulted someone, etc unless there's actual proof, I'm not going to believe it and stand by my husband. If there's no photos, no videos, no text messages, or any other way to validate that my husband cheated/sexually assaulted someone, they can fuck off until proven correct. I'm not blowing up my marriage and trusting some random woman. I get “believe all women” but I believe my husband more. He has shown me for almost a decade what an amazing person he is so I'm going to brush off and ignore anyone who says anything like that with no validation behind it. You should do the same with your wife
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Don’t overthink and focus on whether the relationship makes you happy.
I want to hug you. It’s ok. Take this experience and learn from it. You seem incredibly insightful, in tune with your emotions, and lots of women are looking for someone like you!
Cut your loss with her and move on. She sounds confused and she will probably try to get your attention when you stop giving it to her but just move on. She sounds confused.
Yeah you're right, I probably need some time to think about why I get like that, because what he said wasn't even that bad… Thank you for replying