They aren't your child. You don't get to punish them for an argument. If you aren't willing to properly communicate then you are not ready for a serious relationship
Sober here. If she’s an alcoholic and she is drinking then your problems are a lot bigger than you fearing she’ll get drunk and cheat. We destroy everything in our paths when drinking because all that matters is that next drink. You do not want an active alcoholic in your life. You are signing up for misery.
I meant gossip such as “I heard they are thinking of closing our call center!” That's not mean-spirited, it's useful information. My best work friend used to come to me for technical help, but she reciprocated by telling me the accountant was fired for embezzling – when the office was under a strict gag order not to talk of the matter. (It happened on a day when I was absent and all I wanted was to know what was going on!)
My advice is, try to get over it. Really, REALLY try. Because: 1- the novelty will wear off once he can't antagonize you about it 2- you get to focus on all the other amazing sexy things about your partner, like his personality and the entire rest of his body 3- after a month or two you probably will get used to it, which is ultimately good for accepting our partners in their more 'flawed' forms and loving them anyway And most importantly: 4) You have the PERFECT opportunity for a season pass on free mustache rides, which will probably help the whole dryness factor.
There could be a lot of reason he wants to keep it low key! I had a flatmate in college and over time, we grokked that her family was actually absurdly wealthy.
She wore normal jeans and shirts etc but I remember during one winter break, her parents had forced her to buy a Prada trenchcoat and she hid it in the closet. She invited a few of us to her parents' house for a long weekend and one of our roommates was freaking out because they had Picassos in the house. Then when we got back to campus, freakout-roommate broadcasted to everyone that this girl had Picassos, which horrified rich-roommate.
Like, it actually doesn't matter why your bf wants to keep it low key. Maybe he wants to make friends who like him based in his personality, not his wealth. People can also get weirdly antagonistic when they find out someone has a lot of money.
But instead of respecting his wishes based on his life experience, you're using his stuff for clout.
Also just another point to mention — I've been lucky enough to travel a lot, and my life could easily look pretty cool on socials if I wanted it to. However, what would that achieve? If I want to tell my friends I went on a trip, I tell them when I see them. What is your intention when posting this stuff? Do you want people to feel jealous? Do you want to make your life look cooler than it is? I find the most actually at-peace people I've met don't need to post a bunch of edited photos for internet points.
Any weight related changes she is unhappy about, but she is the kind of girl that is VERY body positive. A lot of her friends are bigger, and a lot of the instagram/TikTok/YouTube creators she follows create content centered around accepting fat women and such. In my opinion, it seems like a coping method as she kept gaining more weight herself, but who’s to say.
Aside from that though, she started altering her appearance one step at a time, which I was okay with at first. If she’s obsessed with getting a septum piercing, and I don’t think they’re attractive, I just couldn’t tell her not to get one(maybe this is where I screwed up lol). But slowly she started turning into a different girl, and the lie of me finding that type of girl attractive, just kept snowballing. Like when she wanted to dye her hair, I didn’t like the idea, but hair is temporary. But after she did it once, she just couldn’t stop. Now I just feel stuck, like if I tell the truth now, that I don’t like one aspect of her attractive, I don’t even know how I would began explaining how I’m okay with everything else.
If this happens frequently then yes I would break it off, if this is a one off time then i would have a serious convo about how you felt, the disrespect he did, and the apology he needs to say not only to you first and foremost but to your famuly as well.
well done! proud of him for distancing himself from the MOH & telling her.
too many posted here cheating with MOH, best man etc
Bride to be is most probably super embarrassed/feel humiliated by her friend action to her husband to be so ended up angry – overwhelmed is definitely the main feeling
Thank you for posting. If it weren't for you, I (May 2022) and many others wouldn't have noticed the reposts and deletions under multiple screen names.
What's interesting is that this pattern predates the ex she met in June 2021 and got dumped by in March 2022.
The post I find most interesting is this one that was posted three times, deleted twice, and removed a third time by mod on March 8.
“I hope this doesn’t mean I’m crazy?
For the last year, I e kinda had a Reddit addiction. I started venting about the way my ex treated me and it became a bit of an addiction. I’m over him now but still addicted to posting about what he did. Sometimes I post in the tense as if we are still together so I get responses other than ‘get over him’.
Venting and posting has really helped me. I delete the posts as I panic about him potentially seeing even though the posts are anonymous. I hope he didn’t.
I started posting on forums when I was 12 about my issues, I think I’ve always had trouble being things up to my loved ones as I don’t want to burden them. Someone called me a troll and that I’m obsessive and crazy and it upset me. I feel this guilt now, like wtf is wrong with me
When I was dating my ex, at the time i never posted, like I felt comfortable and nothing crossed my mind until he started treating me bad and that’s when I posted a lot”
In short, I don’t think she’s karma farming but I also don’t think she has anyone she can confide in IRL.
Okay, yeah, those things are weird. I can see why she’s a bit uncomfortable here.
You need to think before you act. If you know you overstep boundaries with female friends, then think before you message. Pause before you hit send. Take a breath when you’re about to lie. Think about these relationships and why there important to you, and if you have even minor lingering feelings for any of these women, distance yourself from them.
That sounds sus af. I’d give her what she wants and move on before you find out something that’s really going to hurt. I feel like she’s straight cappin, homie. Make sure you go no contact and don’t take her back when whatever she’s doing falls the fuck through.
I married someone relatively “normal” no history of drinking/substance abuse. After years he suddenly had a psychotic break. His behavior got increasingly more irrational and after a couple scary events we divorced. He spent the next several years stalking me, in and out of mental hospitals and several brushes with going missing and getting arrested for stalking random families. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia and eventually after several attempts, died by suicide. It was only then that o heard from his family on how bad the last several years of his life got and how at one point he was coming to kill me and then kill himself.
Sometimes I r need to look at situations as black and white. You have to do what’s right for you and staying with someone for the sake of sunk cost fallacy isn’t a got enough one.
He'd probably only consider taking you back of you acknowledge how terrible they are, explain you had a freeze response, and that you are going low/no contact bc he made you realise how toxic they are.
I've ridden motorcycles and motor scooters for over 20 years without any serious accidents. Honestly, I wouldn't date anyone who will prevent me from riding a motorcycle.
Just take a safety class, buy the motorcycle, and save money to go to work.
So I am a firm believer that everything is contagious, calm and chaos included. I would go with:
Im reaching out to share that I will no longer be part of the play I was cast in. While this is unexpected news it is not the end of my plans to find space on the stage. I humbly ask that if you feel inclined you still support my friends who remain casted as I intend to as well.”
If you get a follow up be vague
It was a big commitment and I wasn’t able to fully give what they needed while maintaining the remainder of my life outside the play such as my job. I learned a lot to help better prepare me in the future so I have no regrets from this journey. Thanks for checking in!
One of my past stalkers was my exes current at that time girlfriend. For some reason she was insanely jealous of me. This went on on-line, and on my phone. In all fairness I would not be surprised if ex of mine kept throwing me in her face. Many times I really wanted to let her have it. This went on til one day she made the mistake of doing this while me and a new bf were camping. My bf took my phone called her back, and chewed her a whole new ass and humiliated her then suddenly it stopped just like that.
What the heck were you thinking?
They aren't your child. You don't get to punish them for an argument. If you aren't willing to properly communicate then you are not ready for a serious relationship
You said “he started talking about sleeping with other people (like one night stands and stuff)”.
What does he want? It seems to me that you know what he wants, it's clear. And the proof is that he doesn't pay attention to you: your words.
Like… wtf is wrong with this again. Another smh post
500 days with summer is literally this
Prefect example
Gaslighting and stonewalling – what a combo.
Sober here. If she’s an alcoholic and she is drinking then your problems are a lot bigger than you fearing she’ll get drunk and cheat. We destroy everything in our paths when drinking because all that matters is that next drink. You do not want an active alcoholic in your life. You are signing up for misery.
I meant gossip such as “I heard they are thinking of closing our call center!” That's not mean-spirited, it's useful information. My best work friend used to come to me for technical help, but she reciprocated by telling me the accountant was fired for embezzling – when the office was under a strict gag order not to talk of the matter. (It happened on a day when I was absent and all I wanted was to know what was going on!)
My advice is, try to get over it. Really, REALLY try. Because: 1- the novelty will wear off once he can't antagonize you about it 2- you get to focus on all the other amazing sexy things about your partner, like his personality and the entire rest of his body 3- after a month or two you probably will get used to it, which is ultimately good for accepting our partners in their more 'flawed' forms and loving them anyway And most importantly: 4) You have the PERFECT opportunity for a season pass on free mustache rides, which will probably help the whole dryness factor.
There could be a lot of reason he wants to keep it low key! I had a flatmate in college and over time, we grokked that her family was actually absurdly wealthy.
She wore normal jeans and shirts etc but I remember during one winter break, her parents had forced her to buy a Prada trenchcoat and she hid it in the closet. She invited a few of us to her parents' house for a long weekend and one of our roommates was freaking out because they had Picassos in the house. Then when we got back to campus, freakout-roommate broadcasted to everyone that this girl had Picassos, which horrified rich-roommate.
Like, it actually doesn't matter why your bf wants to keep it low key. Maybe he wants to make friends who like him based in his personality, not his wealth. People can also get weirdly antagonistic when they find out someone has a lot of money.
But instead of respecting his wishes based on his life experience, you're using his stuff for clout.
Also just another point to mention — I've been lucky enough to travel a lot, and my life could easily look pretty cool on socials if I wanted it to. However, what would that achieve? If I want to tell my friends I went on a trip, I tell them when I see them. What is your intention when posting this stuff? Do you want people to feel jealous? Do you want to make your life look cooler than it is? I find the most actually at-peace people I've met don't need to post a bunch of edited photos for internet points.
Any weight related changes she is unhappy about, but she is the kind of girl that is VERY body positive. A lot of her friends are bigger, and a lot of the instagram/TikTok/YouTube creators she follows create content centered around accepting fat women and such. In my opinion, it seems like a coping method as she kept gaining more weight herself, but who’s to say.
Aside from that though, she started altering her appearance one step at a time, which I was okay with at first. If she’s obsessed with getting a septum piercing, and I don’t think they’re attractive, I just couldn’t tell her not to get one(maybe this is where I screwed up lol). But slowly she started turning into a different girl, and the lie of me finding that type of girl attractive, just kept snowballing. Like when she wanted to dye her hair, I didn’t like the idea, but hair is temporary. But after she did it once, she just couldn’t stop. Now I just feel stuck, like if I tell the truth now, that I don’t like one aspect of her attractive, I don’t even know how I would began explaining how I’m okay with everything else.
Be a decent human being, look for his wife, and send her proof.
He's a scumbag and has it well deserved.
If this happens frequently then yes I would break it off, if this is a one off time then i would have a serious convo about how you felt, the disrespect he did, and the apology he needs to say not only to you first and foremost but to your famuly as well.
well done! proud of him for distancing himself from the MOH & telling her.
too many posted here cheating with MOH, best man etc
Bride to be is most probably super embarrassed/feel humiliated by her friend action to her husband to be so ended up angry – overwhelmed is definitely the main feeling
Hey KrKrKr004,
Thank you for posting. If it weren't for you, I (May 2022) and many others wouldn't have noticed the reposts and deletions under multiple screen names.
What's interesting is that this pattern predates the ex she met in June 2021 and got dumped by in March 2022.
The post I find most interesting is this one that was posted three times, deleted twice, and removed a third time by mod on March 8.
“I hope this doesn’t mean I’m crazy?
For the last year, I e kinda had a Reddit addiction. I started venting about the way my ex treated me and it became a bit of an addiction. I’m over him now but still addicted to posting about what he did. Sometimes I post in the tense as if we are still together so I get responses other than ‘get over him’.
Venting and posting has really helped me. I delete the posts as I panic about him potentially seeing even though the posts are anonymous. I hope he didn’t.
I started posting on forums when I was 12 about my issues, I think I’ve always had trouble being things up to my loved ones as I don’t want to burden them. Someone called me a troll and that I’m obsessive and crazy and it upset me. I feel this guilt now, like wtf is wrong with me
When I was dating my ex, at the time i never posted, like I felt comfortable and nothing crossed my mind until he started treating me bad and that’s when I posted a lot”
In short, I don’t think she’s karma farming but I also don’t think she has anyone she can confide in IRL.
Okay, yeah, those things are weird. I can see why she’s a bit uncomfortable here.
You need to think before you act. If you know you overstep boundaries with female friends, then think before you message. Pause before you hit send. Take a breath when you’re about to lie. Think about these relationships and why there important to you, and if you have even minor lingering feelings for any of these women, distance yourself from them.
That sounds sus af. I’d give her what she wants and move on before you find out something that’s really going to hurt. I feel like she’s straight cappin, homie. Make sure you go no contact and don’t take her back when whatever she’s doing falls the fuck through.
I married someone relatively “normal” no history of drinking/substance abuse. After years he suddenly had a psychotic break. His behavior got increasingly more irrational and after a couple scary events we divorced. He spent the next several years stalking me, in and out of mental hospitals and several brushes with going missing and getting arrested for stalking random families. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia and eventually after several attempts, died by suicide. It was only then that o heard from his family on how bad the last several years of his life got and how at one point he was coming to kill me and then kill himself.
Sometimes I r need to look at situations as black and white. You have to do what’s right for you and staying with someone for the sake of sunk cost fallacy isn’t a got enough one.
…outside of adultery or open relationships like the OP’s situation, how would this apply to other relationships? This phrase intrigues me
He'd probably only consider taking you back of you acknowledge how terrible they are, explain you had a freeze response, and that you are going low/no contact bc he made you realise how toxic they are.
I've ridden motorcycles and motor scooters for over 20 years without any serious accidents. Honestly, I wouldn't date anyone who will prevent me from riding a motorcycle.
Just take a safety class, buy the motorcycle, and save money to go to work.
He’s had the exact same amounts saved up as me and he makes 7 times more then me…..
I’d just tell them no but I’m cold like that
So I am a firm believer that everything is contagious, calm and chaos included. I would go with:
Im reaching out to share that I will no longer be part of the play I was cast in. While this is unexpected news it is not the end of my plans to find space on the stage. I humbly ask that if you feel inclined you still support my friends who remain casted as I intend to as well.”
If you get a follow up be vague
It was a big commitment and I wasn’t able to fully give what they needed while maintaining the remainder of my life outside the play such as my job. I learned a lot to help better prepare me in the future so I have no regrets from this journey. Thanks for checking in!
One of my past stalkers was my exes current at that time girlfriend. For some reason she was insanely jealous of me. This went on on-line, and on my phone. In all fairness I would not be surprised if ex of mine kept throwing me in her face. Many times I really wanted to let her have it. This went on til one day she made the mistake of doing this while me and a new bf were camping. My bf took my phone called her back, and chewed her a whole new ass and humiliated her then suddenly it stopped just like that.
You know that's bullshit because it's been two years. So why is he not moving forward with these things he ostensibly wants?