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Crack.
People give extra attention at the beginning of relationships then often get complacent once comfortable.
Yes. That's why I'm telling him this was a horrid idea.
For some ppl this is stuff of dreams.
I’m good, Joey. Thanks for asking
Thank you so much!
A-Fucking-men.
What the other girl is doing is shady as fuck, but she doesn’t technically owe OP any sort of loyalty or consideration. Her boyfriend, on the other hand, absolutely does and has completely dropped the ball.
Your concerns are totally valid. Just talking is innocent, but doing so while deliberatedly ignoring the SO is not. And sending intimate photos is a thousand times more inappropriate.
The worst part is that your bf is aware of all this… and he doesn't care. Clearly he feels flattered by the other girl's attention and in his mind he can get away with it.
Whether you are willing to end the relationship is on you. But it seems impossible he'll drop her, after your previous requests have been disregarded so nonchalantly.
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I’d bet that if you tried harder to help him in the kitchen, he’d be whining about you taking over and pushing him out. It doesn’t seem like you can win with this guy.
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Well you’ve put up with this for 15 years, do you really think he’s going to change?
This is him.
Either learn to work round it or leave him if you can’t.
How about you don’t act like his mother? Stop setting 80 alarm snoozes for him. Stop using your phone as backup.
If you’re not working at the moment, stop asking him to do stuff in the morning. Just do it yourself.
When you do get a job, just do the important things like feed the cat then go off to work and let him sort himself out. If he’s late for work, he’ll get written up and that is on him. He’s an adult.
Texting people as you (without your consent) would be where I would absolutely draw the line. She’s your wife, not your keeper. You’re absolutely entitled to boundaries and privacy. But what are you worried for her to see/read?
Lol bad troll
“Hey, I love the idea of getting a gift for Valentine’s Day but I’m really not interested in toys or lingerie. You kind of mentioned them before and I just wanted to make sure you knew so neither of us ends up disappointed.”
He’s never changing. If this is a deal breaker then leave now.
He is hoping you will just leave him alone and start doing it yourself. It’s understandable because you still haven’t left him.
White knight syndrome. The worse she treats you and act like a victim, the more you will eat it up. Maybe not now, maybe not even by your own choice, this will end. You can either end it now on your own terms or wait until she find someone new and leave you permanently. In any case, this is dead. You know it. I know it.
How was the exact comparison like? What adjectives were used? Was it said with a playful tone or could it have been rude? Does the other person in this other situation not conform to the beauty standards or could they be insecure?
Things such as comparing your hands is not weird but your rib cage?
The guy who invented wonder woman made it work. But I'm sure it's a rarity.
She hit the jackpot with you. You’re paying the majority of her monthly expenses 2 months into the relationship and now you’re willing to pay child support for a child that isn’t yours. She’s most definitely a gold digger and you are oblivious.
Huge red flags. I'd leave him.
I'm sorry you are going through this, OP. I will tell you if I was in your shoes I would drop him immediately. Trust is vital in a successful relationship and he has destroyed that trust. If you continue on this relationship it is likely he will just do it again.
You are young and you can find someone who will treat you right. Don't settle on people who are going to go behind your back and see other people. That just shows you how little he thinks of you. You can seriously do better.
Is he neurodivergent or a bit awkward? Also, sometimes people are suspicious of people that are genuine and well intentioned, like “there's no way they're that nice, they're up to something.” My bf is a very emotionally intelligent and empathetic person and he's had people point-blank ask him why he is so nice and that it's weird.
I could see why an LGBT crowd would be more accepting, being a group that has a harder time being accepted by others. It's probably really refreshing for a straight man to be so kind and understanding, but others might not appreciate or relate to that.
Update.
My girlfriend messaged me tonight apologizing profusely for her behavior and saying she was in the wrong. She also said “Please don't leave me.”
I thanked her for the apology and said that I would still like for us to take some time out.
I honestly did not expect to hear from her so soon and it was a pleasant surprise. We agreed to take things slow and go from there.
Thanks for everyone's differences of opinion on this matter.
Giving her the benefit of the doubt here and nothing physical happened.
It seems like she’s developed a rather unnaturally strong affection for this guy. He may or may not be reciprocating, but I seems like she’s obsessing over this guy and trying anything to talk to him more- including adopting his interests.
I would bet that nothing has happened yet, but if it were to continue, I think your wife would start throwing herself at him.
Oh good lord, there are so many red flags here, it looks like an old Soviet Parade…
Emotionally cheating, jumps right to the tear works, all the usual protestations……
She absolutely had other intentions.
i dont “trawl for older men” at work. i’ve always been nothing but respectful and professional to him, and it’s not like i sleep around with every dude that’s 15+ yrs older than me at my place of work. he’s the only guy there i’ve had even a slight interest in, honestly.
and i dont know why my age preference is such an issue to strangers on reddit, when its of no concern to literally anyone in my personal life. i’m a grown woman with a career and a stable life. ive had successful relationships with older men, it’s not like im some young gold-digging party girl. my child’s father is 16 years my senior.
my question wasnt if he’s too old for me. i dont have an age limit. age quite literally means nothing to me, as long as the individuals are consenting adults. ive been a consenting adult for almost 10yrs now.
If that's the case I just wish he'd be honest about it.
This is so helpful. Thank you so so much.
it's his dick and not yours. So thats that. But I am a guy and If my dick gets hurt all the time I would want to change that. Being a little less sensitive can also mean you can go on longer…
Yeah he’s not going to stop, he’s just going to make sure you don’t find out
Indeed. And I'm sure you've learned from your mistake. I quit cigarettes 4 years ago. It's not easy but you can do it. So I'm not judging at all. Mistakes happen. But depending on who she is she may not be willing to wait for the next one. Some people just dont have it in them to work it out.
OP better tell her to go and prepare for divorce
we didn't want to break up over something as small as clothes
It only starts with the clothes….
You're 28. You know what to do. Leave! He's an asshole and you allow him to treat you like shit.
A threesome isn't a need. It's a want. If she says that she needs to have a threesome with 2 males, would you be willing to accept that? If not, you don't have the right to expect her to agree to a threesome with another woman.
Take a sex break.
I would tell him hoe you feel. Make it know to him how it’s not fun anymore and how you want him to change
Feeling insecure about your partner raising something they want to do with you because they haven’t done it with you yet is a freak out. You can’t handle her having a fantasy when it’s literally something she wants to do with you. How do you expect her to communicate any type of fantasies with you if you get so insecure over the idea of anything the two of you haven’t yet done together?
Thanks, check my updated OP for the outcome 🙂