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Im sorry you’re going through this, also for your sister and husband. Your sister needs someone who can be a safe space for her to release if she’s ready. Try not to label her mentally ill before she gets actually out of total control over her mind. The drugs that was prescribed to her since she was 16 is not in her favor (at least for the long term as you can already see). Life is stressful and the new generation is living under so much pressure due to being exposed and connected to the whole crazy world and news through the unstable technology humans are building. So careful labeling her mentally ill, she just needs love. You’re limited and u can only provide love if you take care of yourself. I advise you to consult with a professional yourself and im sure ull be able to find balance with your relationship. Thank you for reaching out for help. Much love!
I cannot name a single woman who has not been repeatedly harassed, raped, groped, etc. We can't stop this. All we can do is make it public every time. Speak up. Tell someone. Yell out loud. Only the “good” men can ultimately stop this by calling out the bad men.
You’re clearly not trying enough like he’s trying to work it out with you but you’re being difficult
Yeah i wanna give it week. I will update if he's live! again
Please my love, leave him. You need to feel safe with your partner.
I think I am finding all sorts of potential friends in this thread.
Your father made his bed, let him lay in it
With you inlaws not being straightforward, I agree with the above comment .. be gentle but direct, don't dress it up. You need to be clear. I adore my inlaws we holiday with them spend 2 or 3 days a week together for meals or whatever… we had to temporarily move in this last 6months while waiting for a house to be sorted. It is hell ?
Lol, what a bitch. You mean your EX boyfriend right?
You said manic episode. Is he Bi-polar? If so could he be in Psychosis? Definitely not making excuses for his behaviour. But his meds may need adjusting or he needs mental help.
19 and 15?
My last therapist suggested group therapy but I don’t think they would agree to do it so I guess there’s no use in trying to mend.
I think I plan to cut them out for the most part. And I think you’re right. I already have feelings of being a burden and knowing I left them with even more pain will just add to it.
A friend of mine is now a judge, before that she was a public defender, and before that an assistant county prosecutor. She mentioned once that they take seriously when there's evidence of someone killing or abusing animals, as that behavior correlates with breaking other laws. If the police won't help, look around for other options, like the anti-cruelty society and such.
I don't have much advice but holy fuck
Lol why are you trying to nitpick my post? Regardless, I mention that it was another girl after saying he recorded me without my consent. Honestly when I typed this post I already had proof he’d deleted the pictures and videos of me so yes I was disturbed by it, but it was no longer the focus of my attention because I can’t travel back in time and stop him from doing it in the first place. I posted in the first place because I’m genuinely perplexed by all of the above. I don’t say it here, but in person I told him he needed to delete the picture of the other woman as well because I doubt she knows he still has it on his phone. I have no ill will towards the other woman, a major reason it’s even mentioned is so people have the context necessary to understand him then claiming to have feelings for me
Does your job pay more than his / do you contribute more than 50% financially towards shared bills?
If so, your commute is benefitting him, and he should carry some extra weight.
If not I would say your commute really has nothing to do with your chore division. Your job is your choice and it doesn’t get you out of doing your share of chores.
That said, you also don’t have to do chores on his schedule. If you want to relax a bit after work that’s totally cool. Tell him that. Take 30 mins or an hour and then do your chores.
It may also be worth revisiting the cooking schedule. Maybe he cooks some days and you others?
Unhappy or unfaithful men cheat. You can do better.
What you do is you dump him. Obviously.
I can't believe you're seeing this as “throwing away a year”. A year is nothing. Nothing at all vs your health.
Wake up.
I mean yeah… she 100%, will! I would bet on it! IMO this is deeply manipulative. And this type of open talk doesn't really resolve issues with people who are this manipulative. It only tends to work with people who are operating with good faith.
The OP still should say it, tho. But then he has to not react to the upcoming vomiting IMO, as comforting her during that moment will annulate everything he just said.
OP, you need to learn to ignore it. The same way you don't react to a toddler having a tantrum. That is the crucial part here, not the communication, since again – communication works with people who are operating with good faith, not with super manipulative people.
I am assuming that you writing her thesis for her isn't allowed by the college / uni? If so I would tell her that you will be telling them and sending them screenshot of all the messages if you don't receive the money by Friday. Degree's can be withdrawn.
Girl, you're SO young. I remember when I went to college and left behind my boyfriend. I knew it was unrealistic to keep that relationship going. College is going to open your eyes in many ways. Do NOT stay in town just because someone you dated in 9th grade is there. If it's meant to be, you can deal with a 2 hour drive. That's nothing.
One of my first jobs was at a restaurant and restaurants are known for everyone banging each other. I never did but it’s common. Maybe I would if there were more people she slept with there than people she hadn’t.
Iam sorry it ended like that. In the end its better for you, i wish you the best mate
No victim of abuse is “asking for it.”
At the end of the day I want to marry him. I have a neurological thing where I black out if more than 20 people are looking at me! So I prob won’t even remember the ceremony tbh Even if we had the wedding I want, we’d have to do a Catholic do-over or it would be invalid to his fam and hang over his head. My family and church accept me no matter what and don’t look down on the Catholic thing. So it would be harder for him I would greatly prefer a courthouse elopement at this point lol. Weddings are stupid
Yes. But dhe doesn't seem to discuss with him first.
But says: I want to do that and that.
Which may be the problem here.
Oh, the memories of the horrible feeling of anticipation, looking around for drug paraphernalia. finding mysterious items, esoteric and vaguely suggestive. Everything is sus but you want so badly to believe that they are finally telling the truth.
Turns out they only admit what you can prove… trying to love them is a fools game.
Trying to disentangle from them, despite the perils of attachment.
Forced to do mental gymnastics. Who are you gonna believe, I used to ask myself: what they said, or your own eyes? finally, I decided I had enough.
Better to walk away and grow self-respect, instead of a head filled with confusion. i dipped a second before he sucked me into a dry husk
He doesn't want an equal, mature, loving talking relationship with you, he wants his teenage bit to keep her mouth shut, be eye candy, put out on command and worship him while he hangs out with his bros.
That's what happens when men in their late 20s date girls in their teens. They're not looking for a mature relationship.