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From your description I get that he's under more stress in general than the average person, but nothing would make the behavior you describe acceptable, nor that stress something that should be your burden to bear. When my wife or I are under excessive stress and dealing with frayed nerves, we can sometimes snap at each other, but generally the impulse is to seek comfort from the other person, not assign blame and start fights. The former CAN be exhausting for the person providing comfort, but the latter just makes things more stressful for both of you and solves nothing.
That is to say, you were 100% in the right making this sort of ultimatum, as others have said you have got to follow through, and hopefully if he DOES go to therapy he can learn to deal with things in a way that will be better for both of you.
Thank you for this. This gives me a lot of hope. I'm really willing to set aside my fears and make this work. I believe he just needs a bit of time but he's still willing to patch things up since this is our first big fight. I have faith that we will overcome this problem.
I appreciate this a lot ?
Not sure if mine counts as a break since we both wrote with each other everyday and said we still love each other. But he left the apartment for a couple of weeks. It felt nice to get some distance to try to understand yourself and get some space. It also made the spark come back I feel like, I realized how much I missed him and wanted to be with him. It was vey nude though and a risk is that it can go the opposite way and you drift apart more.
the man told u to ur face that u are not in his future. he told u, to your face girl, that he is gonna marry, like marry marry, NOT YOU, but another girl. girl.
I would type that out and hit send. Unless it was an affair or something, I don’t really see this as a situation she should be making about herself. Obviously she’s going to feel something about it, but you’re totally just in how you’re feeling.
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I think due to how the dating world works atm, a lot of guys feel like they should be happy with any female attention they get. I guess they feel very devalued by it all and there for tend to accept more then they should.
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Lol, I feel for this guy. This shit sounds exhausting.
I am going to repeat my request that you please stop contacting me about this. I have not downvoted you but have already requested once that you not continue speaking to me about this. Because of reddit being reddit, I am unable to block anyone but I feel extremely uncomfortable with how dismissive you're being of me & acting as though those beliefs are beliefs everyone holds.
Depends on where you live!. I can only list pros I see:
Commitment. This is how you say you're serious and committed for the long term. You can do that in other ways, but this is the most standard. Comfort and trust in your partner. That can come in many ways, but this is just a big reassurance. Taxes and expenses. This largely differs depending on where you are, so I'm talking about mine. Lending or giving a lot of money requires taxes; that can include paying for someone's rent and utilities. You can give a couple hundred here and there without legal things, but when you move into thousands over a year it becomes problematic. Married couples are each other's closest relatives and can transfer almost any amount of money back and forth as a gift (up to like 30-50k a year, I think, but that's massive money where I live so it doesn't apply in 99% of the time). Kids. It's easier to have children when married. Both when it comes to government support, finding childcare, finding a school, and just documents. If you have children first and then get married, you have to remake most documents which can take months. Also, if you're not married, the man can hardly care for the child 1 on 1 in public. So no walks, trips, and can even be nude to look after things back home. Medical reasons. If something happens to your wife/husband, you're the first person on the list. If you're not married, you wouldn't be allowed into the hospital to see the hospitalized partner in many cases. The more serious the reason, the less chance you'll see your partner. Finances when buying things together. Here you're either married or you're alone financially, there are no partnership laws no matter how long you on-line together. So if you're buying a house together, you better spend extra 10% of what you'd pay for the house for extremely expensive lawyers to put up contracts or be married.
Lol. Not even your “reality” is your own reality. All that schooling and it looks like you still haven't learned anything. What a waste of time and money.
Is this satire?
Honestly, it's very nude to flow with the natural calming of the initial romantic surge. This also happens if you're in person. It's just easier to doubt your partner when you know you can't drive over to their school or house and SEE what they are up to. I would say that 20 messages a day is still A LOT. Maybe set a very low number, in your estimation, and YOU stick to that, and see how the deprivation makes you feel. I don't know her or you, but this is vaguely suspicious behavior to me, a stranger. I wish you all the very best.
Why don't you go out with the guy who is texting you and see how your boyfriend feels.
We agreed to being exclusive two months in =\
This might be controversial but: Not all feelings are valid.
Her having an irrational hysterical response to a general life annoyance is a her problem
but…he doesn’t care enough about you to get your name right? he doesn’t care about your feelings either. he prioritizes his female friend over you, his girlfriend.
the fight should have ended in a break up. that would be the best outcome.
Wow thank you. I have realised quite how manipulated I have been from the comments on this thread. Very grateful for the wake-up call for for you taking the time to comment ?
Waaaaooow… ? sorry, this kind of blew my mind. Its not a troll post is it? No? Okay you are 19 and he is 20 you are way to young to lay down that kind of ultimatum. Why not grow a little together see if you two actually fit together yeah. Also work a little, gain a little experience some money yeah…