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Model from: jp
Languages: ja,en
Birth Date: 1983-10-15
Body Type: bodyTypeAverage
Ethnicity: ethnicityAsian
Hair color: hairColorBlack
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Screeeeaaaaaaaahhhhhhh!!!!!! OMG No! Why are you reaching out?! The humans will not understand! You are will accept your lonely or they will make you suffer for the admittance. Have you not learned?
If I had an award to give you then you'd have got one. I didn't see the OP but I'm also sick and tired of people recognising someone is an abusive relationship and then being abusive towards them themselves as if that's going to help them leave. They have absolutely zero clue about how abusers work to trap and manipulate their victims into staying and it shows. Either that or they're abusers themselves and know exactly what they're doing.
No, as when we had met we both said we had no children (my son is the result of failed contraception). However my wife and I have fostered many children, we have taken in friends and family members children when they needed it, and adopted two wonderful children. My wife has always been the most giving, nurturing person I know. So it’s hard for me now to accept she would just leave because I have a child.
The things she said in describing those photos to you were aggressively bizarre. I would never, ever show my potential or actual SO photos and point out who I’d had sex with or who I wanted to have sex with. That she did this is borderline cruel. You’ve been dating for a few years? I simply cannot imagine why she said any of that to you. Trying to make you feel insecure or jealous? Whatever it was, it was decidedly unkind.
If you’ve been dating a long time, you know her. Maybe she was just talking & wasn’t thinking – she was talking to you like you were one of her female friends instead of her bf. Or maybe she was playing “mean girl” games with you.
If it ever happens again, it’s more than fair for you to say “please don’t tell me about sex you had with other guys. I don’t want to hear about it.” She’ll push back with something about you being so insecure or she shouldn’t have to monitor what she says around you, and you’re allowed to hold firm. “I love everything about you, but I don’t want to imagine you with other men. If you think that makes me insecure, fine. I don’t need or want to know anything about your sex life before me.”
This has nothing to do with her being your “first” and everything to do with you being a regular human person.
Personally, it's been 3 months and there's been no contact. Best to just leave it and move on. Let the whole relationship be a lesson about learning how to manage your mental illness, and knowing how to recognize these issues before you put yourself into a situation where you could potentially repeat this with someone else.
Apologizing now because you want to be in a relationship again is self serving. Apologizing for the sake of apologizing, because you feel contrition for how you acted without expecting anything from him is a different matter. Right now it sounds like you're only interested in apologizing for selfish reasons.
Thank you.
Would you still love me if I did this completely irrational and life altering decision without consulting you first?
The people who ask stupid questions seem to always expect a stupid answer.
OP doesn't know. That's why he's asking for advice
I suppose if you want to give it a try you could buy a cell phone lock box and ask him to put it in at the beginning of the date. They won’t open until the timer is up so there’s nothing he can do but exercise his patience muscle.
And if he’s not a doctor on-call, it doesn’t really matter if he gets an emergency call. There’s nothing he can do to save someone’s life, so he can just wait for the outcome like everyone else.
It doesn't pass the sniff test and neither will that lingerie when she gets back.
It actually is constructive
I’ve been in a situation where my boyfriend started ONLY wanting to spend time with me if we had a group of friends. I mentioned wanting to spend time with just him, alone. We broke up. Sometimes it’s better to be straight forward with your wants or needs and get the bad news than it is to skirt around and prolong what might be the inevitable.
“I’d really like to spend some time with you a little earlier in the day. Maybe we could make time for dinner or a movie a little earlier than 9pm.”
Lmao so you knew you wanted to marry her less than two years in but are saying it's totally normal and fine for him not to know after ten? Okay. You were only a few years older than they are. It's not like there's some enormous, unimaginable difference between 25 and 29. Both are fully-developed adults in their mid-late twenties. If he doesn't know by now whether he wants to marry her, he doesn't.
And you still haven't addressed him explicitly lying about being ready to propose, which as I said is an equally big issue.
did you say OP shouldn’t marry the guy?
I was responding to you saying “if he gets married now, how do you think that will go?” I'm saying that she shouldn't marry him even if he does begrudgingly propose because he clearly isn't enthusiastic about it.
OPs bf is a creep. So he's trying to use coercion to get her friend into a sexual relationship with them neither of them want.
OP please find yourself a decent man. This dude is disgusting.
Like this commenter stated keep your friend get rid of this useless manipulative man. He's telling you you aren't enough for him. Go find a man that will actually love you!
But opening up a relationship in any case when u don't want to because a partner is forcing it NEVER works out!
He's gross.
Is bi-weekly payments new for car loans? Thought these loans were monthly payments.
Anyway, don't cosign anything. Do not take on any of his debt. If this is his very first car and he just learned how to drive, he should buy used. Right now is one of the worst times to buy a car in decades. If he can't afford the car on his own, he probably can't afford the insurance that's required.
Well done. It should not have taken this long for someone to point this out. It is childish, abisive behavior by a grown married woman who should be more mature.
I'd probably tell him that it sounds like she's being unprofessional while at work. He was there to visit patients. She's there to help the patients, not try befriending the patients family while on the job. See how he replies to that.
I can almost guarantee that he would snap. He's got a thing for her.
OP really needs to read this response. this is very good, level-headed advice. it’s a lot more than I would do because I think I’d kick him to the curb & go no-contact, but this response lays out both options of working it out or breaking up very well.
OP this is worth the read. ??
Trust is a decision made when committing to a relationship that can only be broken with hard evidence. If this is not the case, you have not made this decision yet.
This is abusive behavior and you need to leave before it gets worse. This changes our brain chemistry and it affects us to our core. Abusers will hurt on purpose and then be the charming, overly caring person to save you from what they did to you. This is not healthy. It’s dangerous and it could get worse.
There is no reason to be scares. Problem exists, and is real. Not to mention it a sign for whst you can expect in the future.
If she can't see your point, then you shouldn't waste your time in relationship with her. Do not be afraid of break-up, sometimes it is for the best.
Run. Also wtf wear condoms you are being extremely irresponsible.