It seems like he was not okay with you being a stay at home mom for several months and him taking over as the sole income earner, and is now passive aggresively letting you know, and trying to “even things out”.
It seems like you need to have a discussion about this, and for him to have better communication if something is bothering him.
We online with our parents. No she stays at home most of the time, her friends come over at our place most of the time and she never comes late home. She doesn’t obey me, she listens to me.
I hope she can get the helps she needs. If I'm not taking meds on a semi-regular basis (along with using lists, reminders etc), nothing would ever get done haha!
IMO a healthy relationship not working out emphasises that there were active attempts to try and turn it into something bigger. I agree that his lack of communication is one of the main culprits here.
I'm not sadist and it discomforts me to see pain in anal vids. I've assisted in bdsm with my partner, where she is clearly enjoying things like wax play.
Causing your partner pain for your pleasure is a strange line with abuse, respect, and love. How are they compatible?
What you said regarding the numbing gel and him not wanting you to prepare for anal is a red flag or stop sign in my books.
Do what you feel good about, not just neutral or willing to tolerate. Communicate that clearly to him.
He can have his porn fantasy, but don't let him cross your boundaries.
I normally just lurk on this sub but your relationship sounds so much like my younger brother and his wife that I found it quite upsetting.
You hear people say relationships should be 50/50 but I disagree, relationships should be 100/100 whenever you can give it. It's ok to dip on occasion, no one is perfect all the time, but you support each other through those times.
What is she giving? Because at the moment it sounds like about 180/20. For 5 goddamn years. That's absolute crap from a life partner. She's gonna burn you out and then move on to the next sucker.
Why should I take his last name. He’s not changing his name. And my dad has never once been bothered but the fact him and my mom have different last names.
I’m definitely not hyphenating I already got 2 middle names i don’t need 2 last names on top of that
You’re 18…. Who cares ? Like. So… So. If anything simply ask. And if you’re not cool with that dynamic express that but don’t make a big ass deal about it… fwb … long distance …. he doesn’t owe ya much explanation. You don’t owe that suspicion too much energy. Be 18… if you’re not comfortable then on to the next.
Are these searches on mainstream porn sites? If so, it might not be that much of a concern mostly because that’s a common category with actual adult performers and tends to fall in line with western/American perspectives of youth = beauty (but still adults).
If he is searching places all over the place across various sites, I would have more trouble gauging this.
Just move on. She might be letting you down easy, and she might have feelings but have chosen not to act on them, and you might never know which. All you know is that she's asked for the friendship to end, so let it go and move on.
That kind of makes them both shitty in this situation. Her for sending that video and causing more issues, and him for sleeping with someone he knows wants a relationship from him when he had no intentions of anything beyond sex. Sounds like he used her feelings, and she was all too happy to jump in because she thought she’d finally got what she wanted. Even though it’s not cheating and he’s cut her off, I don’t personally thing I could move past that. Just because he at best showed a serious lapse of judgement, and at worst deliberately preyed on those feelings so he could get off. There’s nothing wrong with him sleeping with someone else when you were broken up, it’s specifically the fact it was her.
That's insanely rude of you to attempt to gatekeep how I'm processing something stressful. Out of proportion or otherwise, it doesn't change how I feel in this moment. I'm trying to get advice on how to move past it, not to be forced to feel worse. Thanks.
That literally means you do not trust him. You can chalk it down to your insecurities if you feel thats what needs working on but you're kind of answering your own question.
I do trust him that doesn’t mean I’m not insecure.
No, you don't. Its both your insecurities and where they come from. You can't trust someone and just blame your insecurities for looking through your phone. That means you literally do not trust them.
After reading this post i thought u were the woman, yikes bro. Grow a pair
Damn I'm sorry to hear. Does he even go down on you or anything?
It seems like he was not okay with you being a stay at home mom for several months and him taking over as the sole income earner, and is now passive aggresively letting you know, and trying to “even things out”.
It seems like you need to have a discussion about this, and for him to have better communication if something is bothering him.
We online with our parents. No she stays at home most of the time, her friends come over at our place most of the time and she never comes late home. She doesn’t obey me, she listens to me.
Same here.
I hope she can get the helps she needs. If I'm not taking meds on a semi-regular basis (along with using lists, reminders etc), nothing would ever get done haha!
IMO a healthy relationship not working out emphasises that there were active attempts to try and turn it into something bigger. I agree that his lack of communication is one of the main culprits here.
Cowardice not denial.
Seriously you need to break up immediately. She’s going to ruin you
I'm not sadist and it discomforts me to see pain in anal vids. I've assisted in bdsm with my partner, where she is clearly enjoying things like wax play.
Causing your partner pain for your pleasure is a strange line with abuse, respect, and love. How are they compatible?
What you said regarding the numbing gel and him not wanting you to prepare for anal is a red flag or stop sign in my books.
Do what you feel good about, not just neutral or willing to tolerate. Communicate that clearly to him.
He can have his porn fantasy, but don't let him cross your boundaries.
Make up sex/hate f**k tonight and kick her to the kerb in the morning ….
I normally just lurk on this sub but your relationship sounds so much like my younger brother and his wife that I found it quite upsetting.
You hear people say relationships should be 50/50 but I disagree, relationships should be 100/100 whenever you can give it. It's ok to dip on occasion, no one is perfect all the time, but you support each other through those times.
What is she giving? Because at the moment it sounds like about 180/20. For 5 goddamn years. That's absolute crap from a life partner. She's gonna burn you out and then move on to the next sucker.
Ahahah girl… Valentine’s Day is coming up. Do you
Why should I take his last name. He’s not changing his name. And my dad has never once been bothered but the fact him and my mom have different last names.
I’m definitely not hyphenating I already got 2 middle names i don’t need 2 last names on top of that
recently?
oh boy.
It does not have to be recently to have leakage. It happens.
You’re 18…. Who cares ? Like. So… So. If anything simply ask. And if you’re not cool with that dynamic express that but don’t make a big ass deal about it… fwb … long distance …. he doesn’t owe ya much explanation. You don’t owe that suspicion too much energy. Be 18… if you’re not comfortable then on to the next.
Look up Woody Allen adopted daughter wife. Yep.
Are these searches on mainstream porn sites? If so, it might not be that much of a concern mostly because that’s a common category with actual adult performers and tends to fall in line with western/American perspectives of youth = beauty (but still adults).
If he is searching places all over the place across various sites, I would have more trouble gauging this.
Just move on. She might be letting you down easy, and she might have feelings but have chosen not to act on them, and you might never know which. All you know is that she's asked for the friendship to end, so let it go and move on.
Prioritize yourself. He just miss having someone that cleans after him.
That kind of makes them both shitty in this situation. Her for sending that video and causing more issues, and him for sleeping with someone he knows wants a relationship from him when he had no intentions of anything beyond sex. Sounds like he used her feelings, and she was all too happy to jump in because she thought she’d finally got what she wanted. Even though it’s not cheating and he’s cut her off, I don’t personally thing I could move past that. Just because he at best showed a serious lapse of judgement, and at worst deliberately preyed on those feelings so he could get off. There’s nothing wrong with him sleeping with someone else when you were broken up, it’s specifically the fact it was her.
You can come up with an excuse for anything that way.
If a dude can't handle rejection like an adult that's his problem. Doesn't mean you should actively lie to people and encourage that behavior.
Especially if he's a greatly appreciated friend, unless that's a lie too.
I was stabbed but feel guilty for looking at the wounds?
That's insanely rude of you to attempt to gatekeep how I'm processing something stressful. Out of proportion or otherwise, it doesn't change how I feel in this moment. I'm trying to get advice on how to move past it, not to be forced to feel worse. Thanks.
I've never had anyone ever comment on my lazy eye.
Your family might be crazy but your boyfriend is very immature. Looks is not everything, find yourself a real man.
You're going through a breakup. Of course you're going to long for him.
Ah yes of course, because no woman has ever tried going after a man’s assets that she had nothing to do with him receiving. Just say you hate men.
Kids are a two-yes situation
That literally means you do not trust him. You can chalk it down to your insecurities if you feel thats what needs working on but you're kind of answering your own question.
I do trust him that doesn’t mean I’m not insecure.
No, you don't. Its both your insecurities and where they come from. You can't trust someone and just blame your insecurities for looking through your phone. That means you literally do not trust them.