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Model from: in
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Birth Date: 1992-09-12
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One question I do have is did he want to bring her with or not?
One is 100% chance of blue skies, the other feels partly cloudy.
I wanted to give her another chance As im sure ive said previously, i left her after finding out what she did, then she came back saying “Not gonna do it again” I took her back cuz i missed and it was nice that she chose me over that stuff And then last night, she said she did it again and after posting this here and reading the comments, i dumped her hoping we can still be mates Im not prepared to date her again if she could potentially go “Nah im not doing drugs again” while doing drugs again Shes had 2 chances cuz im a nice guy, not having a third tbf
Holy shit. The biggest problem here is wasn’t up front about finances and doesn’t treat you like an equal.
Bounce.
Sounds like this guy needs some therapy.
My mom was 42 and many families Ive nannied for had kids in their late 30s or early 40s. You’re not too old. Go find that special someone who will be your partner in building a life!
There are outliers on either side. One of my ex girlfriends went through the change in her early 30s, “early menopause”. We were no longer together at that time, but were still on good speaking terms, she was devastated that she missed her chance to have children (the traditional way). If OP wants a man to provide her the security to have kids, then she needs a man who's open and honest with her and more established.
That's my first impression as well
I'm not a doctor or anything, but she just sounds like a cunt. That doesn't sound like a “trigger” or whatever. Just sounds like she wants an excuse to make you look/feel less than in front of others. You said it only happens in public right?
You ought to disclose that being trans is a deal breaker instead
99.99999999999999999% of people would look at two people who have vaginas having sex as lesbian. 99.99999999999999999% of people would look at two people who have penises having sex as gay. The fact that one dresses and looks like someone of the opposite gender does not change the fact that their genitals are the same as the person they are having sex with. I don't care how manly or transitioned OP's boyfriend is, they can not have straight sex as it stands.
Leave. Why be with someone u can't make a baby with if u want one. You're wasting her precious time. Or, be cool with adoption if shes open to that. Guess it all depends on whether or not you think she is the woman you want to be with for the long haul.
How do you responses to that?? Run far and away NOW.
Ok, so assuming this is a real question, which I'm not sure it is, just a quick FYI:
You can fuck as many dicks as you please, but some men don't like high “body counts”. You can think that's wrong, but it's a fact regardless. Irrespective of that, even if they're OK with the number of men you have slept with, they don't want to “casually” hear about your sex life.
“He said that I should be staying at home and cooking for him”
Not sure how anyone doesn't break up as soon as they hear some bullshit like this.
You don't get him on board.
You tell him the terms of the marriage have changed, and you let him decide if he wants to accept those terms or leave. You don't have to have sex ever again, but he doesn't have to stay. It's a two way street, not just “your way”.
When the phone stops working, she will get the gist. No reason for additional communication.
He told me he feels disrespected
Did you do anything to make him feel that way?
I originally wanted to go to therapy together but now I’m like…. What’s the point if he doesn’t like ME?
If hes been married to you for 10 years I'm sure there are things he likes about you. I think he has been influenced by some toxic gender ideas. Couples therapy might be a great way to clear up some of his misconceptions and get him back to how he used to be. And if that doesn't work then there is only one option left.
Yep, pretty sure my husband would throw me at them to give him time to escape LOL
Well I've been in 'similar situations' before, but it was a computer, and I was playing games on it.
I'm not sure if it's the lack of time he spends with you or the over all noise he makes that bothers you, assuming the noise. Either way, it's not unreasonable to expect him to respect you. When I was told it's bothering my partner, I made changes so it doesn't. I would expect my partner to do the same for things that bothered me.
A reasonable person would, at the very least, turn the TV WAY down when you were around. Isn't that what partners do, care enough to be considerate for the other person? Otherwise that person is not considerate and in retrospect, honestly doesn't care about your wishes.
So my advice? Don't cope, it's unhealthy. Tell him the above, how you feel about it, and how it's effecting your life. Talk, don't argue, be calm and explain. If he doesn't listen, he can fuck right off. You don't want to be with someone who simply doesn't care about you.
-It happens every few months, in a regular pattern of the same behavior.
-He starts obsessing about some annoyance or minor inconsideration from you, then gets paranoid and passive aggressive about talking about it.
-Can't really explain his malaise and anxiety except by blaming you later. Then has a panic attack and throws a small fit a few days later when avoiding vulnerability doesn't work.
Yeah, this isn't about you.
If you were actually selfish or inconsiderate by default, he'd act miserable all the time and you and he would be arguing about it constantly. He wouldn't be happy the majority of the time.
His behavior is about avoiding feelings of vulnerability and feelings of being alone.
I'd be tempted to say he had some form of bipolar type ii. Not serious enough to effect his daily functioning but serious enough to effect his mood and his perceptions.
Take that with a grain of salt though as Im not a mental health professional. But I think giving it a name helps to understand that it's not about you and not anything you chose, yourself.
WOW – what a complicated and bizarre way to handle a situation. It’s weird that your boss asked to stay at your place. It’s weird that you didn’t mention it to your GF at the same time (because it’s weird). It’s super weird that, after knowing that your were being “put-out” by her being there, your boss still stayed at your place and cost you $400! It’s all just weird as f*ck. Your GF has every right to be upset that you kept this from her, to wonder what the hell you were thinking and to feel that your boss overstepped a boundary. Honestly, her being alone in your apartment at night feels almost more weirdly intimate than if you had slept on the sofa to me. Up to you whether you tell her or not but, for crying out loud…don’t do something like this again.
Thank you ❤️
It's a tough thing to reconcile.
It's a reminder of both something that hurt the one you love AND a reminder of an experience she had with someone before you that you will not have with her as a result.
I would recommend talking to your girlfriend about it. Quite often i feel…out of sorts myself about this sort of thing. I don't always know why.
I revert to talking to my fiance and asking questions to explore and investigate what's bothering me. Always ends up with me better understanding what's wrong and with me being able to work through my feelings.
Good luck
What are the chances that OP’s bf is the special prince who pays to use women’s bodies because he checks notes respects them so much?
about 1.5 years, and I didn't, I got a great job in the US, and I'm already a citizen, so I moved from Jordan to the US and we decided to have a life here.
Being apart made me frustrated, so I had to watch porn and we got about 9 hours difference.
Would it be appropriate after the course?
Do you really want to be trying to date a guy that sees new students every year? Sounds more life a fantasy goal.
You should read Why does he do that? It'll help you recognize manipulation tactics
Sounds like he broke you down and love bombed you which is a very common manipulation tactic
Wait for her to wake up again.
Tell her she has 1 chance to be completely honest with you about it all.
Failure to do that will result in divorce, he friends and family being told that she cheated on you, and you kicking her out, and destroying her art (if it’s not finished it doesn’t have value, and as she’s not working bringing in any money, even if it did, it would belong to you not her)
Then once she tells you, you give her 30 minutes to pack her shit and leave. When she complains that you said 1 chance, tell her yes, and the concession for telling you the truth is that she can take her art.
You then tell her family and friends.
And then file for divorce.
I honestly don't understand why you haven't divorced already.
He says he just wants me to be me, but at the same time he'll let me know what bothers him without really setting boundaries. I really wish he would though.
I honestly don't think he's expecting me to give up any friendships, maybe he'd be happy if I removed this particular friend I talked about, and I would for him, but I would also be very sad about it.
I think his expectations are that I don't flirt or invite flirtatious behavior which I already don't do. Or maybe he really does want me to cut contact with my guy friends but just doesn't want to say it. I really don't know..
Fuck them. Your health is more important than their need to validate by someone eating their cooking, and you’re grown adults. You don’t have to ask for permission to stay in the same room as your boyfriend of several years. He REALLY should have stepped up and confronted them about their ludicrous behavior as well.
Honestly not saying he doesn't suck, a lot, I just disagree with the approach of going into a discussion with the assumption that the other party is acting maliciously.
He 100% was wanting to be unloyal to you and it backfired. Even if not, why would you want to be with someone who wants to go no contact for a while like this? I would never feel safe with a partner like that. You deserve better.
I think that feelings can generally fluctuate, you won't always feel so in love with them (especially if you're not putting in the work to go on real dates like you mentioned in your previous post). Going off of that, the “in love” aspect of love will, after some time, need to be more actively sustained as their presence basically becomes the norm.
Try scheduling some fun date activities, or going on a trip. Bring up these issues with her and see if you can talk through them with her. If you don't communicate, then any relationship you enter into will fail.
It does you both a disservice to just end it now without really trying. That being said, if you really don't think it will work, or if you do try and it doesn't feel like anything is changing, then yes break up with her.
You both are old enough to make your own decisions regardless of what her family thinks beside it is only 3 years gap.
Be an adult and tell her.