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Yes. You don't go to a party if you are sick
I’m sure he’ll call you a goddess after this…
If you don't want it to end up on the internet/public knowledge, don't do it. They will show all their friends and even post it. Even if they insist they won't.
This is weird and alot of red flags look up Brittani Louise Taylor
an elbow to the guts is the only way a guy learns to keep his hands to himself, I had a mates cousin who when we went out drinking he would always try to hug me and I told him you put your hands on me I elbow you in the kidneys, he thought i was bluffing but he never did it again.
Even better, if I cosign a student loan with my kid, and my kid dies, I inherit all the debt, even if my kid was doing great and could have had a job lined up. Student loans are a horrible thing for a society to do. I want good engineers, doctors, and teachers, I want good financial people, good lawyers. I want good scientists, good researchers, good sanitary workers. I want a society that works with well educated people. We should have that. We shouldn't be saddled under mountains of debt in order to discharge our duty to society.
I am sorry that you feel scared and I understand why it might feel like a big risk to let go of the relationship. That said, continuing in an unhealthy relationship can ultimately leave you feeling unfulfilled and stuck in place as well – so while it may seem easier to stay with this partner, if they have not shown consistent effort or willingness towards being honest or supportive in the long-term then perhaps consider what other options may be available for finding stability and safety?
Perhaps taking time to focus on yourself right now is most important – what would make YOU happy and secure? What do you need for your wellbeing when things get nude? There are always resources out there beyond relationships, such as counseling, therapy groups, support from friends/family etc., which could help provide some comfort during these challenging times. Hope this helps!
Honestly? If you’re questioning whether that comment should break you up, there must be bigger issues in your relationship.
He was 19 and it was very early days… you should have just laughed. Let it go
Sounds like you found the flag
He did nada to feel guilt about, you can't cheat if there's no relationship either way. hypothetically speaking if OP did nothing to deserve this treatment from his wife she is a piece of garbage.
There's nothing wrong with you.
A lot of people don't meet their partner until later in life.
I didn't meet my first wife until I was 23. Until then, I had a few girlfriends, but no really long-term relationship (not for lack of trying!).
Today, I'm 58. I was married to my first wife for 10 years, then dated my current wife for 8 years before marrying her 14 years ago.
Suggest it as a first resort. This will solve the root of the problem for both of you
I am really hoping both of them can become friends. I hope that Beth can come to see that Amy is no threat to us. All of that sounds awful. I am a very honest person and have never hid a conversation from Beth, and hate the idea of a future like that.
Thank you for your feedback and time.
I thought 18 was of age in Canada?
Anyway, according to the laws in most western countries, sexual abuse against minors doesn’t have a statute of limitations. You can still go to the police and report it.
Out of respect. In our experiences, guy and girl friendships only work if both parties aren't attracted to each other in the slightest. The only opposite sex friends we have are family. During our dating phase, my now girlfriend had a few guys she considered friends, nothing more. But they all eventually tried moving past the friend zone. For myself as well I refuse to have girl friends because I get much more enjoyment out of hanging with my guy friends. In my experience, girls just talk about drama and nonsensical stuff half the time ?
This man sees you as an incubator ATM. Run. Run as fast as your legs will carry you.
Massive red flags. You do not cease to be an individual in any relationship, and it sounds like he sees you as his gravy train to get rid of all of his debt. Absolutely make sure that he isn't tampering with condoms or anything like that or that you have another form of birth control that only you control, because I wouldn't be surprised if he tried to baby trap you, esp with his controlling nature. A prenup is a must if you do, but seriously, don't marry him.
I feel that. I grew the balls to break up tho. Therapie yay.
Uhhhh you got a link on that for the morbidly curious among us?
You don't think you're in love with him anymore. I mean, do you even really like him at this point? At the very least, the resentment is building, there doesn't appear to be any change in sight, and it's only a matter of time. Either way, you should not stay in a relationship just because he's not getting a job and you feel bad.
If you're paying for everything, you need to have a conversation with him and let him know you're going to stop. His financial situation isn't your responsibility so stop letting him make it your problem. He needs to start paying for half.
An action like wrestling is a much more discrete (limited, not discreet) thing than talking to and about your partner. It would take substantially more energy to change it in a way that feels organic. It's not the same as asking you to stop being autistic but in my opinion it's closer to that than asking to wrestle. I certainly hope she's never done that. The way we talk to one another is a lot more intrinsic to most people's personalities than an activity and a request is far more likely to cause her to feel like you don't love her the way she is.
Also play fighting can spiral into real fighting real quick if someone hits a sore spot. That is a degree of difficulty I would not be actively seeking out, particularly if I was neurodivergent in a way that usually makes reading social cues harder. It is super uncomfortable to be sitting there as your friends have a real fight they are pretending is “playful” because someone brought their partner's mom into it or is pissed that the sink is full of dirty dishes or whatever it is that strikes a nerve.
Fair enough. Thanks for the context. Is he also aware of the fact that you’d have to online and rely on a partner?
I wish you all the best…. I've been there and done that and he won't change until you leave him
I usually am, but you know those situations when you walk into a room and you can feel that you walked in on something you shouldn't have. And there's this deer in the headlights, back away slowly kinda moment. And then it was overstimulation and confusion. We talked about it again before bed; he chalked it up to him being a guy (using the sweatpants to hold up his penis while using the restroom), and scrolling through the media. But he wasn't anywhere near the toilet, and the app he had pulled up was certainly not the one he said (the app he “was on” has a white background, I saw a blackish screen).
Are you sure there is nothing to be done because of compatible issues? We really love each other… And otherwise everything is perfect..
This ?. I’m disgusted at all the comments in support of barely legal teen porn.
Show up to life every day. It happens throughout life.
I only read the title and it's a hell no from me, dawg.
Should leave a shovel on her doorstep.
Sis, he was your childhood boyfriend. VERY few relationships survive growth from childhood to adulthood because people fundamentally change (as they should).
You SHOULD grow and change. And, you HAVE grown and changed.
You are currently letting fear hold you back from living your best most beautiful life. Trust me when I say being with someone out of habit is NOT better than being alone for a while.
Dump him and focus on getting your education, building a career, developing great female friendships, using your money to travel to amazing places. Build a life for YOU! That is what your 20s are for. They are not for being tied down to some dude who says he is settling.
I'm on your side with this one. If you leave stuff in your pockets and it gets washed, it's your own fault, not anyone else's. But I don't really think there's a right or wrong answer, just personal opinions. Might be best if you both just did your own laundry. No way to blame the other person that way lol
He keeps doing it because you don't do anything about it ie, leave. Have a bit of self respect.
That is understandable. It takes up no physical space and is not a mental or physical strain to go about your day. Real hoarding is terrible and an actual mental disorder
He wants to be with her, if she didn't believe you then she needs to go.
When you break up tell her she will believe you the second he professes his love now you are broken up.
I think you are on the money with this. I can't imagine it would be an easy thing to raise with a partner, especially since she seems to love and be close to her parents based on your description.
I would've been GONE at number two.
I was thinking porn. Porn involves positions that aren't the best for feeling good, but instead are the best for looking good on camera. He's out of tune with his bodily sensations and just wants to look at a woman striking certain poses.
Anyway, it sounds like he's being an asshole about it, so cutting him loose is probably the best policy.
Stop beating yourself up over this (unless there is more to the story). If he cared for you and was looking forward to spending the rest of his life with you, there wouldn't have even been a desire to be overly intensely flirtatious with another woman.
It’s a little quick to be proposing in my opinion, but that’s just me. I take it you don’t live! together? There’s no rush. Might be better to wait a while to ensure it’s what you both want.
You dont want kids. He has a kid
You dont want a liar. He is a liar
Please break up FFS