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Shery , ♥ I’m new here, let’s go with the flow ♥, 19 y.o.
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They're not best friends. They're some kind of emotional affair kind of situation.
well, to me she is beautiful and as very hot as some hot actress, maybe even more, cause she's mine 😉
I kind of never looked down on her concerning looks, I cant complain about her at all!
Go home he isn't good for you and adding kids will only make it worse
You need to go no contact with Mimi, she adds no positive value to your life. Mimi needs to stay off the alcohol.
What did she lie about?
I would say your heart or body signaled you have an attraction or feelings or some kind for this friend if you were “hoping”
but that isn’t cheating….still…take a moment to consider what the moment and feelings mean? It could just be a blip. It could mean something more?
It is not controlling if he is using YOUR CAR. Tell him that if he is using your car, you have a right to know where it is and when you’ll have it back.
What happens when you need to go somewhere and he is out?
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Honey you have to leave him alone. You opened up the relationship because you were BORED, he told you he would leave if he found someone new, and he found someone who doesn’t treat him like a backup sex doll.
What are you expecting? Things can’t just go back to normal, it’s far past that point.
You like the chase, not the prize. You’d just get bored again and the cycle would repeat.
Coerced consent isn’t consent. No is a complete sentence. He’s trampling over your very clear boundaries and blaming it on previous relationships “making him behave like this”.
N to the O to the P to the E. Nope. If he’s like this now, imagine what he’ll be like in the future.
Get rid of him, I say. What benefit is he bringing to you and your life? X
GF needs to know not to buy a teenager clothes – it’s personal taste. Your daughter was very polite about it. Your GF was an AH
My brother's religious representative is literally completely irrelevant to OP's post. Please read what he actually wrote. He WANTS to expose his kids to multiple religions. My brother and I are both really happy with the paths we've chosen in terms of faith, and that should be any parent's goal when they raise their kids.
Are you suggesting that the only positive outcome here would be if all of OP's kids practiced Catholicism? Otherwise I'm not sure what your point is.
Your family suck!
OP. The time to leave is now. Not when you get a job, not when you have an apartment lined up but right now, like today. Start the new year off in a safe place. He already knows you're trying to put yourself in a position to leave and he's obviously willing to do a whole lot to stop that from happening. Please get out before he hurts you.
What do you mean??? I honestly thought this was someone catfishing me at first like someone that already knew me
Lying about infertility isn't great but trying to get somebody pregnant against their will is violence. I would never forgive him.
If my bf did this, i would immediately assume they had a quickie! What else are they supposed to do in her flat? He disrespected you upfront! Its a different story if you were not there (which is also not good!) but you were in the same place and would just disappear! You yourself felt the sympathy of the person who all of sudden approached you. Wake up darling you deserve better!
I was being dramatic
Omg get her a Toto toilet bidet. you don’t have to replace the entire toilet. It will wash and dry her parts and she can use a lot less tp
Oops, missed the NB part. Sorry. But the sentiment stands — OP needs to get over herself.
I presume you've talked to your doctor about this cuz recurrent UTIs is definitely not normal. If you're peeing after sex I wouldn't think you should be getting them all the time whether it's just something with your body and how it's wired or him being basically dirty down there I guess you need to find out the source. Are you just assuming it's because he's not wearing a condom and he has poor hygiene? Obviously you haven't had a chance to rule that out since he refuses to wear a condom. I'm sorry but I would throw out the whole man if this happens constantly cuz he doesn't give a crap about your health.
It's the right response…. it's silly.
Nothing you can do but move on and accept the loss.
You make a move before you develop feelings. You find a person attractive, try to flirt etc with that person. If they seem to flirt back, ask them out or something- but be clear with your intentions from the start.
If you find a person attractive, the worst you can do is becoming their friend and wait until you start to think you love them, then you have invested so much time, energy and feelings in something that you are not on the same page about as the other part.
Sometimes friendships can develop into love, but it's rare and should not be your getgo way doing this, as the likely hood to fail is big and it takes extremely long time before you get to the expressing your interest point.
Don't try to stop crying. Your fiance needs to manage HIS emotions around the fact that you cry.
Crying is a natural human response to having emotions.
I told my ex husband that he needs to just keep talking to me like I'm not crying and continue the conversation.
My boyfriend just hugs me when I cry and doesn't act like I'm trying to manipulate anything by just crying.
My fiance has told me that this bothers him and he wants to have a mature discussion whenever we have a disagreement.
Crying doesn't stop a mature conversation. He needs to get over himself.
OP says he believe they can fix things, but literally why would he want to? He’s falling for the comfort of a routine person when there’s nothing else being offered here.
Sure, as OP says, she’s not a “monster.” But that’s literally it. I have absolutely no understanding of why you would even try to stay with someone when all you can say about them is “well they aren’t abusive.”
She doesn’t offer you any type of emotional support or pleasantry. She doesn’t offer you physical intimacy. She doesn’t offer you any type of financial partnership. She does next to nothing around the house. You couldn’t even pick one of the smallest benefits typically associated with a partner to justify staying. OP had a roommate that he completely financially supports (and honestly spoils.)
OP, I think you’ve made yourself into a martyr. You’ve fallen for that intoxication victim mindset. When you’re in such a blatantly shitty situation, it’s so easy to be “the good guy” without having to do any self-work or introspection. That’s why people often get stuck in these situations.
If you want that for yourself, fine. But you know this is ridiculous.
Furthermore, if you look at statistics, people who are divorced, are more likely to divorce again.
I feel like this is some meaningless statistic created with circular reasoning… people who don't get divorced at all by definition cannot divorce more than once. Of course only people who got divorced are more likely to divorce.
Get a checkup. Low T or thyroid. Then see how u feel.
What is this “my baby” stuff? Is that what you call your ex? Who refers to their exes as “my baby (at the time)”? Genuinely curious, maybe it’s just something im not familiar with.
Yeah, what? I believe the person who commented that their intentions are in a good place, but I find this so bizarre. I feel like “I’m married” might shut someone down quicker than “I’m seeing someone.”
So you dumped him. And I get why.
And now you’re back together.
You’re thinking like you’re in a 4 year relationship, when you’re in a 1 month relationship… with baggage and very hot feelings.
Slow your roll.
I don't do anything to them. I give them a ride and talk to them.
You both need a better sense of humour to be honest. There was no reason for this to escalate to the point it did, and either of you could have prevented that.
He did it on his own. I never suggested it I would feel some type of way as well. Thank you for your advice it has helped. We talked and I left my feelings out of it.
Well grow a backbone and lay down some boundaries you both can agree too. If she can’t compromise then break up and move on. Whining and sounding helpless isn’t gonna help her respect you more.
What are some of these comments telling you to leave him. He just said preferred it, he hasn't demanded that you do it, he just said that's his preferences and what's wrong with that? We all have preferences and as long as he isn't demanding you do it, I don't see the problem.
If you want to make him happy you can try some alternative methods as I certainly get the itchy part and discomfort, I got some new blades and razors to use and other products that help with that, so it isn't an issue for me anymore.
There's no chance of them having kids because they've never had sex and never will.
Maybe? Dude, I've seen less obvious robberies on The Wire.
And then risk the child being abused by the rapist its entire life.
OP this isn’t a you problem, it’s a HIM problem. He has to address these crazy insecurities and you’re unfortunately in the crossfire.
You might find help at /r/LifeAfterNarcissism
I know she enjoyed it because she's told me.
You have to get over that ego of yours. I feel the fact she communicated how she felt rather than held it in and grew to resent you and eventually maybe look elsewhere. It happens man. The fact that you did something about it is also actually very good. But now you are resentful of her communicating how she was feeling. I’ve only been with one woman for the last 28 years. I’m all she’s got and I feel it’s my responsibility to stay reasonably fit and attractive for each other. It’s better that she told you. Truth hurts sometimes. Maybe she could have communicated with more empathy and you guys should discuss that and how it made you feel.
Nope , we live separated. She only comes for weekends. She does not pay rent at my place
Checking her phone is not cool, but I can understand why you want to. You have set boundaries and she keeps crossing it, and disrespecting you and your guys relationship. Best to leave
Your spouse changed, not you. You can’t change your sexuality
Completely agree with what you are saying. I also have communicated this initially. In a second conversation I will be able to address this more effectively without being obstructed by the natural emotional response we both had initially.
I have never ever heard a positive story about dating a social worker. It sounds like she is trying to recenter the attention on herself. She's not anxious, it's basically self-harm… except imagine if someone cut themselves when you had a tummy ache. Intentional vomiting is extremely bad for the body. She needs serious help, and I'm not saying that to be mean. DBT at minimum.
She's in a competition. Let her know that you're not.
If his sister spreads all your private info, don’t tell his sister anything private.
Also what tiktok did you send that would cause him to block you and his own son?? I feel like there’s some details missing here
Your bf needs to stand up for you. If he’s not yelling at his family for saying bad shit about you, then he’s part of the problem.
She’s not a small child so she won’t need that much of a ‘set up’
I can understand why your wife would be upset, I mean that’s pretty life altering
Have you considered counseling? For everyone involved.
This is a big change for her too (child) she just lost her whole support system
You might point out that if she continues she will ruin this marriage. Then she'll be single and she won't be a virgin, either, for the next man. Does she think he would be justified to pillory her over her non-virginity for the rest of her life?
I did message her myself to say he was upset and she replied with something passive aggressive about how weddings are supposed to be about family and that they used to be close but not anymore. I feel like now it’s up to him to communicate with her.
And yes, I appreciate your concerns. We have done a huge amount of work on how we communicate directly with eachother. For the first year we lived together he’d take every small ‘criticism’ as me picking a fight and would become massively defensive/avoidant. Things have improved hugely, however, this has become a bit of a sticking point. I have suggested therapy and we’re trying the Gottman book (7 principles to marriage) and I’ve put feelers out for an live therapist. We’re in the UK and it’s not such a common thing here so harder to find someone.
Lmao nice try vagina spammer
Take your money out and open your own individual account. Your fiancé is financially unfaithful.
I wouldn’t go. They aren’t treating you like family anymore. I’d also ask your mom what prompted her to remove you from their home
The fact that he got so angry about it. Smh.
Sis – block this guy and never look back. You deserve better!
My boyfriend has me saved as ❤️”name”❤️ and I feel like every girl deserves this!!!!! Especially after you’ve asked!!!!
Talk to a lawyer about suing him for half the cost of the IVF.
I’d also very seriously consider it he divorce now, while he’s employed, in case he would try to go for alimony, too, since it seems he has no problem letting you pay his way as long as he has a carrot to dangle.
Careful there buddy, you're 1 letter off
Most of us are probably thinking this. SP was brave enough to say it. ?
Yeah he's not your person OP.
He has more issues than Time Magazine.
She’s not your friend. She knows how you feel and she’s using you to make herself feel better when she’s lonely and is happy to ditch you when someone else comes along. Frankly the way she’s treating you is cruel and the way she treats others is equally as heartless. She’s not a good person.
If all he is doing is looking at the other women and not talking to them I don't think it's worth addressing to be honest.
Its more of a 'how do I measure up to these women he's looking at' that makes you uncomfortable. And that's not his fault.
If you ask him to stop looking at other women that's controlling and it shows you're not secure with what you have to offer him. In my opinion. If he's looking at other women so what, you've been with him this whole time and he's been choosing you instead of all those women every single day. You're the one who he chose, you're the one he desires the most. Leave it alone imo.
I know you said they don’t believe in hiring a helper. But at least try to hire someone to do housework for you guys. It would be so much less stress on you.
lock down your shit so only people you allow see your stuff
so many crazy stalker posts would not exist if the posters did this ???
He's not happy. Don't believe him. If he was, he wouldn't keep trying to be affectionate. Affectionate people aren't happy not receiving it.
My local ER has a closet that sometimes has a few tents in it, that’s basically the extent of their social services.
Could you move to a different city?