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You forgot the part where you ask for advice about a relationship
Thank you for the advice!
Read “Not Just Friends” bc it sounds like he's involved in an emotional affair. It'll give you advice on how to approach the situation.
Yeahhhh, this is why I loathe the “if he said that to ME he'd be in the hospital and I'd be in jail” comments that proliferate online (and in real life)…like the assumption is always that the affronted person is going to win the fight, for some reason.
That’s true but like maybe here is a metaphor idk if it’s good
But,
Let’s say your with your girl
And u get robbed at gun point
It’s not your fault for getting robbed at gun point
But now ur gf thinks ur a pussy for getting robbed
Is it valid if she breaks up with u?
That’s like the perspective situation I’m thinking
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Sounds to me like you don't have a boyfriend I'm sorry but this is how these things happen sometimes take a deep breath do some new s*** and try to forget about him.
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They're 18 Like just leave the relationship and focus on the rest of your life
Look it’s her! It IS irrational to put unneeded stress on your partner if he LOSES HIS JOB. It’s not her place to act like his mother. It’s her place to SUPPORT him emotionally. Your priorities are seriously screwed up with relationships and likely you’re exactly like her with your defensiveness. Word of advice as a female adult professional who makes over 6 figures because you sound like a juvenile – never EVER attack your partner emotionally like this woman did if they lose their job. It can be traumatizing for men also. They also want to apply for jobs at the SAME salary or higher not some Wendy’s job. That’s an absolute joke. Welcome to the real world, kid.
He cheated on you, he hid it, and the only thing he cares about is if you’ll actually enforce any consequences. I’m betting he went to that happy ending massage with the mindset that you might not even be able to leave him over it, but he’ll hide it just in case… He sounds shitty. I would not stay with a man like this, especially considering he’ll be traveling for work again. He’ll be getting a special session from more strangers in massage parlors and hide it again, and I think you know that.
I’m ashamed to talk about this with my bestie because I know what she will say – to leave.
Honestly if someone's objection to using a toy is that they don't get to participate as much thats a vibe, but I reckon you can participate and use the vibrator.
yes to photographic evidence of OP at the club, but is going to a club automatically cheating on the relationship?? Even if he had slipped away to the club to have a drink with his buddy, that's not on the same level as cheating with other women. And there was no evidence of cheating, just the friend making accusations and surprise, surprise, she didn't bother to take those photos. Why would she take photos of him at the club but not of him kissing or holding another woman? telling all this to someone about to have a baby is just cruel, and was seriously malicious. The GF was probably not thinking her clearest anyway, due to pregnancy. But now that the lies have been admitted, GF needs to take a serious naked look at this friend of hers, because that's some major nastiness there, and it caused GF distress while giving birth.
Depends how much you want this relationship.
If it's worth it to you try couples therapy and commit to 10session . Shouldn't be too expensive with insurance.
If it's not that important maybe just bring it up 1-3x tops and if it continues break up.
I've dealt with this and have been this way (when I was 18) and it's just pointless and sours your life eventually.
Someone this irrational. If that's the only flaw maybe she can get over it if she realizes that's not acceptable and it damages the relationship
To me it seems like so many stories about hurt require monogamy for that hurt. I'n not very experienced but to me it'd seem that if those stories didn't contain monogamy, they wouldn't contain the hurt.
Oh geez. What a spectacular coming out. I have no helpful advice I’m afraid.
Look, platonic friendship between opposite genders is possible. It's much more rare than some people would like you to believe, but it is possible. What your boyfriend has is not platonic friendship with this woman. They are fuck buddies and probably nothing laughing at you for falling for his bullshit. Get out now while the gettings good and you still have a shred of self esteem left.
Cheating is normal for shit people, if it was normal he would not hide it, all his friends and your friends would. Run away, and go zero contact this fool is going to just lie to you:
For my own mental well-being I have not asked, and I don’t want to ask. I am assuming that he will never break even and that all of his money is gone. Well, it certainly is now ?
Bro at I entered 28 single af and at 31 I’m married you need to chill. That anxiety will ruin more potential relationships then itll save
Age gap, him not proactively telling you about this, and his constant flirting with her? All combine to say maybe you should be dating him.
Chill the fuck out. You’re only 26. Do you want a partner to share your life with, or do you want to not be single? Learn to love yourself single, dude.
Relationships rarely a have a fixed date of origination and they just kind of drift organically toward either some level of commitment or dissolution. So you can't really fault this guy for keeping his options open prior to getting more serious with you ('cause that's basically just called “dating”). But if he started getting psycho territorial about you immediately that's a huge red flag. Even minus the glaring double standard, people who try to cut their dating partner's off from friends are just insecure, jealous and they don't trust you. That he exchanged some loaded texts with someone else early on in your dating process is infinitely less important than that he seems to believe you're just dying to jump into bed with all your male friends.
You never need a reason to leave a relationship but this is a pretty darn good one. Zero respect, no effort, you deserve way better
Wow, WTF?
r/whatdidijustread
“Every time I invite my neighbor over, she takes a dump on my carpet. I’ve asked her not to do it, but she keeps doing it anyway. What else can I possibly do to stop this person from taking a dump on my carpet? I’ve already tried continuing to invite her over and comforting her after she does it — are there any other options, or am I forced to continue inviting her over and watching her shit on my rug??”
No that's not normal, stay far away from this dude.
I don’t get it… why would he have moved me in if he felt this way?
Because he wants to have a girlfriend at home while still having sex with other women.
We’ve known each other for over 12 years, why does he keep lying?
Because he keeps getting away with it.
Does she complain about other things that you didnt do “first” together?
God forbid you try a new food without her, blasphemy.
This sounds more like religious trauma affecting a marriage, than a marital issue in itself.
I think she would benefit from counseling outside of a religious setting. To be clear… I don’t know if you are religious but having religious trauma doesn’t mean you can’t be religious… just means there is trauma affecting her and you.
You hope a side of him has changed, big difference from seeing it.
You go back to him and he will know that cheating on you isn’t a deal breaker. He will just learn to hide it better next time.
It is such a sweet kind hearted thing to forgive, but it will cause your heart to break . Protect yourself and your kind heart for someone who will care for you like you deserve
Totallly agree.
I'd be sad for a long time too considering what she preferred over me …but all the same, I'd still be ending things. If 7 years of marriage isn't enough for her to love me and want to be faithful to me, nothing ever will be ..for her.
Yes, that’s what they always do. Maybe they believe that they will actually change things in my experience, it’s just don’t true… they always go back to their behavior.
Please, please do not go back. As someone who survived living in a house with domestic violence, I saw this cycle over and over and over and over again. No matter how sincere they seem, do not believe them.
Block him on everything, go no contact, warn your support network and get a restraining order if you must that way if he violates it, he will be sent back to jail.
I know this seems extreme but I saw my mom get beat on and off for like five years. He always cried and begged and showed promise but always reverted back. He almost killed her a few times had I not intervened. Every time she left him, after crying and begging didn’t work, he’d sit outside our house and threaten to drive his truck through it and kill everyone.
My cousin on my dad’s side was killed by her husband. My aunt on my mom’s side successfully left abusive boyfriend and two years later he killed his partner. That could have easily been her…This is literally a life or death situation, please don’t make this mistake.
Please check out the resources I shared on my other comment.
yep. marriage does not magically cure whatever problems a relationship has.
OP, your future with him is not of a wife, it’s a caretaker of the man who acts like a child/teenager and his parents who he will most certainly not be proactive in caring for.
You’re right. This isn’t the first time he’s mentioned not hitting me as something I should be grateful for. The saddest part is that if you’d asked me about this exact situation before I met him I would’ve told anyone to run as fast as they can but for some reason I feel like I let him make me believe that I really should be grateful for that. Thank you for helping put this into perspective
My (M32) girlfriend (F34) wants to be able to flirt with other men.
Break up and she will be able to.
This is a red flag brother. No women is entitled to remaining in a relationship with you. Let this one go. She wants to be for the streets while not being in the streets and that's a redflag.
That's why so many people have problems. They ignore blatant warning signs.
Is he currently living alone or with parents?
I think I may have misrepresented the situation here. This is a person I hung out with every week whilst with my girlfriend, she wasn’t with anybody which I always found odd and she’d told me after I broke up with Boomerang it was because she figured it would end and wanted to try this out when it did. We spend the majority of our days together as is and she spends the night most nights already. This isn’t some social media celebrity that I obsessed over. Unfortunately I was the bad friend for a while and she kept our relationship alive dropping by all the time, baking me things. Idk how I mis-worded myself to the point where people seem to think lowly of her, but she’s a friend and has been a friend. There’s no digital wall to our relationship. I see her nearly every day and she’s been asking to take things to the next level, which led me to posting about it
Like I said in another comment. It was ridiculous for you to agree to and ridiculous for you to stick to. If “standing your ground” over your porn history is worth losing your marriage over, then so be it.
No this is not salvageable and is cruel to him.
As a woman, I agree with both groups. I would much rather someone come up to me and talk to me about class or something causal, maybe something he noticed about me like my glasses or a favorite topic, and then directly ask me for socials or give me his number. giving her your number gives her the opportunity to kindly say no without making thing’s negative or awkward (chicks dig guys who don’t make them feel pressured). I think guys have the most success when they’re direct but soft.
Exactly.. this is so obviously a troll creative writing post.. no one can be this naive.