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Yes it’s cheating. I have female friends and colleagues and I have sent very hot pictures to none of them. This isn’t normal behavior between friends in any society.
Even if her friends were planting seeds of fomo/discontent,if the relationship was solid they wouldn't have grown. As they said, there is a lot of change between 19 and 28 and if you weren't growing together, you grow apart.
Same. I lean into it though, it ends up helping me get long-term fwb. I am a full custody single dad ………….so maybe I just rock it right. Single dad life is golden though.
You're honestly considering leaving the most wonderful, patient, sexy, funny, and interesting man you've ever met that you've been planning to marry because he got annoyed with the cats…and of course reddit is telling you to dump him. Nobody is 100% perfect, and if that's what you're looking for, you're going to be that stereotypical single cat lady once your options run out. Be realistic, please. Jesus.
Sunk cost fallacy – don't waste the next lot of years of your life just because you've invested 5 years in this relationship. 5 years in the grand scheme of things isn't a big deal. Youf gf sounds like super very hot work and you don't want to be saddled with that forever.
Get out now if you can't see it working long term.
Yeah she has 2
I understand you're probably a troll but on the off chance you're being serious – yes, break up with him. He deserves better.
YTA divorce asap
I'd tell her that you're still working on resolving your romantic feelings for her and need some space to deal with those before trying to resume a friendship. This scenario is really common btw. Ppl cant just turn their emotions off like a faucet and change the dynamic overnight. Take what time you need and if you find you cant ever just be friends with her, thats okay too
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If it was a question on how he was going to achieve that goal, then I don’t see what was wrong with it. It’s part of a normal conversation to ask questions when someone mentions what their dreams are.
And regarding the cousin, did he ask for help or just mention the gas station? Honestly, in either case I’d consider it a kindness to point out that gas station gifts are thoughtless and overpriced, so he’d get more worth for his money somewhere else. Obviously, if you do say something and you know they are not open to feedback, it’s wise to word it very gently or maybe just watch the crash happen. Just to give yourself less of a headache.
Does your bf ever defend you (regarding comments of your body and you as a person) or does he usually try to just bend to his mothers will to keep the peace? Does he still online at home?
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She also isn’t replying (that I’ve seen) that she’d be ok with boyfriend being there also. If my partner wasn’t cool with me being there I’d not be comfortable with any meeting either. If there’s nothing to hide. Don’t hide it.
JESUS CHRIST DUDE FUCKING LEAVE. You’re not more of a man for taking abuse. You’re not stronger because you can “handle” her. I don’t give a flying fuck how dainty and kind she’s being WHILE SHES NOT FUCKING UP YOUR SHIT WITH A KNIFE TO YOUR THROAT.
Who in your life told you that your manliness is attached to how big and tough you appear because that person needs to burn in hell along with your wife. Fucking get out!!! She not “testing” you, she’s an abusive violent cunt and you are not safe.
This woman will kill you. That much I can say with certainty.
Replace traditional woth misogynic
Gaslight yourself into believing it was a hallucination
U should talk to your sister, whatever your dad did was done and gone but now that he’s trying to work this out and wants to be part of his granddaughter life I don’t see anything wrong in this. I’m on your dads side.
For someone who is supposedly wracked with guilt, you sure seem 100% confident that all your decisions are sound and all your actions are justified.
Maybe people have been vicious because you asked for opinions/advice and then proceeded to be condescending (calling people silly, really?) and dismissive of the overwhelming consensus. You evaded/refused to openly discuss legitimate concerns regarding your children and new relationship and shifted all blame for your affair to your husband (who does sound like a dick, for the record.) Every acknowledgement of the wrong you did was immediately followed by long descriptions of your bad history and mistreatment, aka excuses. Never once did you respond in a way that didn’t paint yourself as the victim.
You would have gotten much kinder responses had you been able to convey a hint that you were actually taking the information in rather than seeking validation for your actions.
I hope it was a lesson you learned from and that you will be more open to the advice/criticisms you ask for in the future.
Thanks, I was about to go to google 🙂
No, not to be mean, but you’re overthinking. I think his behavior is a hint. I highly doubt he wants that talk, could be wrong.
My best advice is to keep other coworkers out of this. This is for you to figure out.
Definitely worth taking notes and keeping the radar up which it sounds like you're doing. Whether it's false alarms or a real issue, it's prudent to keep your eyes open.
You can also ask the question. “So that time you said 'prey', I've just got to know…” A good partnership should be one where you can (and feel free to) ask questions without world war 3 breaking out.
Is your BF white?
I’m sorry but I’ll be honest.
You are too old for him now. He wants someone younger and easier to manipulate. The amount of sex you force yourself to give him (and I won’t even talk about how this is abusive) isn’t enough and he wants someone younger who will “give him ass” as many times as he wants.
I hope you can leave him asap and keep your child because it is clear he isn’t worried about the children.
I suppose I would be remiss if I didn't mention that there are alternatives. You could look into opening up the relationship, but there are too many issues here that would need to be addressed before that should even be broached. In other words, it would just make everything worse.
I also don't get the impression that either of you are the type that would really want that in a serious relationship. I don't know either of you, but I just kind of get those vibes somewhat.
When someone tells you who they really are, believe them.
You ARE a better person than he is, he's too old for you, and he's a frickin' alcoholic. Why are you with someone who can't be an appropriate partner for you? Is he really the best you can do? I mean you ARE settling for a broken older man, and he feels it.
Get therapy. This isn't even a predatory man, it's a younger woman begging to be prey. There's something wrong with you.
Because marriage is more than tax benefits. Child abuse is a crime because you neglect your duty to raise children lovingly . Infidelity in marriage is neglecting a core part of human existence and a betrayal of what should be the highest vow you take . If you cannot be trusted to online by such an agreement you cannot be trusted as a human in any field
Im a poor gift giver and receiver and in the early years with my spouse before we got married, i definitely gave some good gifts and some bad ones reacted poorly to good gifts etc, etc. Long story short, its the thought that counts and its all garbage anyways.
Quick question. So how did your 28 year old husband managed to get a license to practice medicine in Canada?
You are 20, have your whole life ahead of you, and I can guarantee there are men out there who will be compatible with your life and family plans. Just please don’t tell him before you have the abortion, he will do everything in his power to stop you.
You are way too young to put up with a creeper like this. There are millions of men out there that are trustworthy and don't have porn hangups.
No. It’s 6 months in, it should be the honeymoon stage and he’s pointing Percy in all sorts of other directions. He’s not ready or mature enough for a monogamous relationship, try and save yourself from his hurt.
Why are you asking for advice when you know the answer and didn't listen last time.
How would you ever trust this person?
Maybe he decided he doesn't want to be with someone who so easily cheats on their partner.
It might take me 3-4 months to quit and another 8-9 months to show that I have kept up with it.
If this person is important to you and you REALLY want to make it work, you better find an alternative like patches or something and it should take you much shorter than 3-4 months to quit.
On another note, it just doesn't seem like she is particularly happy with you long term so it might be better for the both of you to move on. If her meeting exes makes you uncomfortable and she's not willing to give it up and you smoking makes her uncomfortable and you're not willing to give it up, this might be a disaster in the making.
A good marriage requires sacrifices on both sides. Clearly, neither of you are willing to do this.
Given that my brain is chemically imbalanced and I've been medicated more than half of my life, yes. I do have a very hot time dealing with big emotions. But I have a harder time feeling like a BIG deal was kept secret from me. It doesn't make a girl feel very trusted.
So you’re ok with losing your daughter to your awful bully of a wife? Good choice…..
Very wise of you. Yes, please make a plan. Set money aside and have a deadline for yourself.
But also, I would advise that you put a line in the sand. In your mind there has to a be line where if he crosses it, you'll leave immediately, even if that means you have to ask for the help of friends/family/social services to get by for a while.
You're in a very precarious position, but you WILL get through this. And you will rebuild your life moving forward. Now is the time to be tough, calculating, and adamant. Don't give up on yourself.
nothing in the post or what the gf has said shows that Kate likes op, literally nothing. You (like the gf) blame op for something you just made up? I asked what about this post shows that and you respond with “I think kate likes him” if the gf thinks that kate likes her bf she can like the adult she is, use her words and explain that to her bf and can cut off her backstabbing bff instead of falsely accusing her boyfriend of cheating on her.
i feel like i’m always the initiator or have the idea to do something. just this once i wanted him to do something and he already cancelled once. maybe it’s immature to end it, cause i am. but i know how i want to be treated and i can’t always be the one to force something that is obviously more important to me and they seem not to even remember.
If you can pull her from school and start with an online education from another school that would be ideal.
Also therapy.
Changing schools is also an option.
If you can, get a lawyer, schools are responsible for the safety of those in their care.
They’ll more likely listen to a lawyer.
See also anti bullying groups and talk about your options.
Yes, you are cutting off your nose to spite your face
This is the reality, thank you for the advice, I don't know if I should tell him that I posted this, to let him see the comments and he is so positive that the comments will tell me that I will enjoy it later on.
So why are you against a free, home cooked meal once a week?
I understand your frustration but your girlfriend is definitely very attached to her family. In many respects, she actually has had you auditioning for the role of the man in her life in front of her family. Like it or not, their opinion of you will weigh very heavily in her decision to make a life with you.
If you simply do not have the patience to deal with your girlfriend's family dynamics, it's only been a year so you might want to consider breaking up with her. Giving her her freedom will allow her to find someone who will truly love her and her family who will not consider doing so an unfair burden.
Give some thought to what your priorities should be and make an appropriate decision that will be in both of your best interests.
I wish you the best.
No. As horrible as this sounds I think the only reason she is with you is because she couldnt be with him for whatever reason. Its pretty but a lot of females play along with whatever relationship presents their way. You want to be with someone to who dreams about you and cant stop thinking about the sex you two have