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Obvious ragebait
He’s lied about every other thing already, why is the protection bit the part you’re hanging on to? He’s a liar. He’s probably lying about the protection too. Get tested and get rid of the std that is your current boyfriend.
A lot of people have zero interest in being with or dating more than one person at a time. It doesn't mean he won't reinstall Tinder if you guys don't work out.
i’m not meaning to sound any type of way at all, i’m only 19 i just turned 19 and made a mistake. which is why i came to reddit, i want help or advice i don’t understand why you feel the need to call me names at all, just simply tell me the facts without callin me names. it’s disrespectful i’m trying my best.
Some Said Here I could send her to shrink to get it Sortet…
I am 5ft and my partner is 6ft 3. He goes on top and he goes down on me. This douches height is not the issue and don't let him fool you into believing that.
I would have a conversation with him saying that you feel he doesn't reciprocate what you put in. That you'd like him to go on top sometimes or hell even doggy. That you make sure he has foreplay but he skips your turn. That you're making sure he's pleased and he has no concern for your satisfaction. Or if you don't wish to bring it up first next time you have sex don't give him the foreplay part. When he asks why say you don't want to. If he keeps pushing say he didn't answer your questions either. I realise it's petty but simply asking him doesn't seem to be resonating with him.
Want to change her type? It's easy. She has chosen you. Your own lack of confidence in being who you want to be is the only thing that cam really turn her attraction to you off.
Be exactly who you want to be and be so confident in yourself that her type will slowly change back to being exactly who you are. You just have to give her a stable, amazing, happy relationship.
If that isn't enough then she isn't worth keeping because she has to many issues of her own.
You haven’t done anything wrong, so you have nothing to worry about. 2. It sounds like it’s more his issue than yours if he’s not willing to sit down and talk about things properly. I understand people have been hurt and that could make it nude to open up but that doesn’t dismiss him from at least trying to communicate with you. You’re feeling anxious and lost and he’s just burying his head in the sand thinking about himself and his feelings. A relationship needs communication and empathy. He needs to step up respect you enough to have a proper conversation about it with you.
No u
This is a toxic relationship. Just go.
My ex said something like that to me during an argument. Needless to say I thought he'd be happy with the 180 I did emotionally. I kept my heart away from him so he would have to be bothered. He wasn't happy and well now he's my ex. You can't have it both ways.
im the same way. My partner changed his routines to accommodate me because he knows its important to me.
I said that's what he sounds like… not what i think…
I definitely suggest having a candid convo w his ex. My ex is very charismatic, charming, persuasive, etc. I had no idea he was a abusive until a month into our marriage and I didn’t agree w him on something. Talk about a shock.
Next time tell someone “hey could you brush your teeth real quick?”
I agree with the other comments. Good information and great advice.
Once you leave, block her on everything. Do not respond. If she shows up to work, your house, family's house, call police. If she threatens suicide, call police. If she keeps up dangerous behavior, get a restraining order. Keep all of this crap documented and you will have it much easier.
You can do this. You deserve better. None of this is your fault. Take care of yourself.
He is not your boyfriend any more
I know you're right but can you please elaborate? I want to hear your opinion
True thanks
Im sorry. Its checking once in a while rather and not stalking. Idk Im just sensitive when it comes to relationships
Yep. So if he can’t convince her, they both need to find out where this is coming from. Because if it wasn’t this neighbour it’d be, and will be, the next unlucky woman that wanders near him.
“Financially, we are already struggling to cope with 2 babies, when wife finishes maternity leave, I have no idea how we will cope, childcare in the UK is expensive enough with 1 baby, with 2 then it costs significantly more than her salary, but she is ambitious and wants to go back to work as well.”
They are already struggling and she hasn't even gone back to work yet. It will be even worse when she does.
Acne and violent?!?! What in the abusers handbook is that shit? RUN.
The anime Nana has an amazing depiction of a couple who broke up and caused each other pain, neither got true closure but always wanted it, months later one they’re both in separate relationships and they run into each other and catch up, they put on happy faces but they end up leaving and hiding how upset they are. I think your situation is like this; it’d just bring up painful memories and complicated yearnings. As others have said: It’s not worth it. I can understand considering it and even wanting it: it’s not worth it.
Because he doesn’t want you involved in his life at all. He doesn’t want to get messages from you at all. That is the only way to accomplish that. He doesn’t want to maintain any relationship with you.
You’re not going to try and make contact with him, are you?
Wait wait wait. Let me get this right. You have friends who PRETEND to kiss in photos and that made HIM HAVE SEX with two girls?… And they're supposedly toxic and not him? And he needed to have sex with two girls just in case you felt the urge to do the same?
Do you realise how stupid his logic is? Dude is a loser.
You need to leave and call animal control.
The post: my gf cried over her ex in front of all our friends, publicly embarrassed me and made me feel like she doesn't love me.
The comments: you are a horrible person. You need to 100% consider your GF's feelings. Your own feelings do not matter here and in fact I hope she breaks up with you over this because you don't deserve her.
OP, check this sub out plz
Your best answer is thanks for breaking up with me and making me realise you're a dick.
Honey. Just because he “had it wires than you” dirsbt mean your problems are t valid and shouldn't be spoken about. If he doesn't want to be there for you for your problems but expects you to be there for his and had the nerve to tell you your the one in the wrong and makes you come grovelling back, you are better off without that dumpster fire.
He's selfish and will always be selfish. He will never see you as an equal and as someone who needs to be listened to, he will always prioritise himself in the relationship.
Seriously thank him and move on!
Read again!!!
You both seem poor at communication, but excel at passive aggression. The phone does work both ways, but effort is always appreciated.
so it wasn’t really a horrible thing in our mind, and we didn’t really consider it abuse.
A clear effect of what your parents did, it has messed up your sense of morality and you're repeating their behavior.
I genuinely can't fathom what kinda of person you have to be violent to a toddler. Hitting your children is gonna do more damage than good for them, it's not like that's an obvious thing to understand.
You need to understand the difference between fear and respect.
Yeah, I'd tell her she's right, my dick is too small for a pussy the size of the Grand Canyon!
When you decide to stay with a cheater, two things need to happen; first, then need to work to regain your trust by being fully honest and transparent. Second, you need to actually allow yourself to trust him again. If you can't, no one would ever blame you. But that means you should just end it now. Healthy relationships can't work without trust.
Obviously I'm not here saying you should trust him immediately. But if he does in fact show you that he's made an effort to be someone you can trust, you can't just hold things over him forever. We're putting the cart way before the horse here, but it's something you need to consider.
Finally, you should ask him why he did what he did. And don't accept any cookie cutter answers like I was drunk, or I don't know. Being drunk isn't an excuse. He knows why it happened. Good luck.
“If we don’t have sex, I’m out of this relationship” isn’t a threat, it’s a statement of fact.
I'm very conscious of the fact that our brains work in very different ways, and I try very nude every day to empathetically, kindly and calmly, meet him at his level. I never raise my voice, I never curse. I probably do sound condescending sometimes when I'm irrititated, but I promise you I'm trying.
When I said “let me do it”, I meant “let me do it and you watch” which is how we solve a lot of these things. Sorry if that wasn't clear. Please explain to me how that was toxic. And how do you think I should respond to him “tuning me out”?
Her answer is bizarre and, tbh, unreasonable. But here's what you should do:
Text her a once or twice during the day to say hello, check in, or let her know what you're doing, or send a pic of the dogs or whatever else you're up to. Don't necessarily expect a reply. The goal is just to touch base, stay in touch. Also, give her a phone call at once a day, probably at the end of the day, to catch up briefly.
If she texts you first, then respond to it in a timely manner when possible.
To me, that’s a non issue. In my house, we both do our best. We both empty the pockets before throwing something to the basket and whoever ends up doing laundry still checks them anyway.
The bottom line is, I don’t want to break the washing machine, destroy the clothes in the load or scrape the tissue remains from it.
I think you're probably right. I do proactively sing her praises at any opportunity and shut down an implication she has an easy ride. Not just for that reason, but it's a consideration.
You are most welcome. Remember, you are not alone.
Turn the spotlight away from sex for now. Tell him you want to get to know him better and sex can take a back seat.
Dump him. He's a parasite. And a grumpy one at that.
I have so many concerns about this relationship. The “she's using you” camp has already been covered, so let me hit this from the other side:
so we took things very slow as I didn't wanna push her. So for about a year I was there for her
Okay, so you were friends for a year.
Well I told her them or me so she stopped talking to them.
Why are you so adamant about her not having any contact with someone she shared a child with? Her ex and his mother are presumably some of the only people in her life that have strong memories of this child, and it seems strange to have such strong feeling about keeping her away from them, especially at times such as the anniversary of his death.
So after the year and a half we officially get together
You gave her an ultimatum – when you weren't even “officially” together – that she could either have you in her life or the father of her deceased child.
I even got a picture where she went out to eat with her ex and his mom
Did someone see them out together and send you a picture, or were you following them?
But no matter what I do I can't get her to open up to me and talk to me anymore… Its like she doesn't even care…
I worry that it seems to her – as it does to me – like you're isolating her from people she's close to, and maybe using your financial support to manipulate her into a more serious relationship.
Before you got to her reaction I was going to say you’re a dickhead, but her response blows what you did out of the water. Leave her, she cheated and did it intently to hurt you. You’re a bit dumb for your actions but she’s a fkn hoe
She got burned out just like you said she would. Maybe she still loves you but is numb from all the stress and medicine. Still, if she can't reach those feelings it's like she doesn't have them at all. Only a lot of time and de stressing will tell but i doubt you'll be having a lot of fun together until then.
You’re just gonna have to talk to him about everything. What if he doesn’t even want an open relationship?
So much this. I don't need to know every tiny nuance of my partner's relationships – actually I don't have time I have like a job and hobbies. That should apply to everyone.
He is my boyfriend and we just started dating 3 days ago.
We did talk earlier. We talk all day everyday usually. On Thursday we talked and he told he would have a late night and he would call me later hence i was waiting. I talked to him right up to when I left for the night on Friday.
I understand it’s important to him and we’ve been doing it for the past couple of months just fine so I feel like two unintentional “slip ups(?)” shouldn’t cause this much reaction. I get being annoyed but anger seems to be a little much here.
Depends on your relationship with him. You might want to get more information about alcoholism first. As best you can, answer this quiz as if you were him. If thinking through what his answers might be makes you more worried, then probably he has a drinking problem.
You can decide then if you want to try to help him or withdraw from the relationship. If you decide to stay then you would probably benefit from being in a support group.
Depends on your relationship with him. You might want to get more information about alcoholism first. As best you can, answer this quiz as if you were him. If thinking through what his answers might be makes you more worried, then probably he has a drinking problem.
You can decide then if you want to try to help him or withdraw from the relationship. If you decide to stay then you would probably benefit from being in a support group.
Depends on your relationship with him. You might want to get more information about alcoholism first. As best you can, answer this quiz as if you were him. If thinking through what his answers might be makes you more worried, then probably he has a drinking problem.
You can decide then if you want to try to help him or withdraw from the relationship. If you decide to stay then you would probably benefit from being in a support group.
Depends on your relationship with him. You might want to get more information about alcoholism first. As best you can, answer this quiz as if you were him. If thinking through what his answers might be makes you more worried, then probably he has a drinking problem.
You can decide then if you want to try to help him or withdraw from the relationship. If you decide to stay then you would probably benefit from being in a support group.
how long does it take someone to get out of a horrible depression
Maybe a day, maybe a lifetime. There is no single answer to this.
Thanks for clarifying. It just wasn't clear how the conversation had gone.
People who irrationally and constantly accuse others of cheating have a tendency to be projecting.
Don’t try to get over your resentment! It’s doing you a favor in this case. You’re supposed to feel resentful about an abusive partner and leave. So please, work with an attorney and a trusted friend who sees your husband for who he is and make a plan to leave safely.
Your kids will be happier in a home free of abuse.
Then YOU go away.
They won't.
The break is ongoing, she says she will love me how she did once she isn't stressed at home, She lives out of town but we have been talking about going to the city once her exams are finished for a few nights then go back to mine, she has been telling me stuff like she can't wait to visit ect…
She provided information that he uses violence and explodes. That's in her post. The recommendation for relationship counseling is inappropriate.
You are not wrong and you should dump this guy Sex is a mutual thing and has nothing to do with the time you spend doing other things. Does he ever go down on you??
Also does he ever pick you up from your place?? He is not a keeper
I’m going to talk to him. I’m just so angry with my mother
I'd tell him only if you can be sure that you won't be bullied into doing something you don't want to do. You will be breaking his trust if you don't tell him. But if you tell him and he's pushing you he's not the right guy. It's not his body nor is there any guarantee besides his word that he will stick around and help out. Perhaps I'm a bit jaded but imo, no woman should trust her bf to take care of her if shes pregnant (sister's baby daddy waited a year and a half before making the minimum effort to take care of his kid, all the while showing off as a “fantastic dad”). When it's not your ass on the line, your money or your body, people make more flippant choices. Still I think trusting him enough to tell him is important and taking his input is beneficial even if it just tells you what kind of man he is.
Your boyfriend is an ass.